Have Your Cake and Eat It, Too

A few days ago, I met a woman in Thailand who is familiar with our podcast. It was shocking that she knows who we are - especially on the other side of the world - but her kind words were uplifting and encouraging. One of the things she said struck me. She loves how we continually talk about and teach the importance of being financially responsible……while also living with meaning and enjoyment.

She went on to share how this mindset makes all the difference. It’s easy to put our mathematical hat on and make the ”best financial decision.” Doing so takes no effort and no thoughtfulness. We simply do the math and make whatever decision results in us having the most money. Unfortunately, when we let math guide all of our decisions, we turn into fun-hating robots. We hoard our resources, say “no” to anything fun, and constantly wonder when enough is enough (spoiler: it will never be). Conversely, living financially responsible AND with meaning allows us to disconnect ourselves from constantly making mathematical decisions.

Yes, let’s save, give, invest, and practice frugality in the various areas of life. These are inherently good things and our life will most certainly be better for having done them. However, let’s also take that trip, buy that thing, make that memory, eat that meal, and go to that event. These things add so much richness to our life. It’s about balance and intentionality. When we get it right, we truly can have our cake……and eat it, too.

There's So Much We Don't Know

Yesterday, we wrapped up two days of meetings and said goodbye to our friends. It was a long few days and lots of important work was accomplished. We grew our relationships, created memories, shared food (lots of food!), and told stories. The experience was priceless.

This morning (Thailand time while you were all sleeping), Sarah, me, and a few other friends hopped on a plane to Hua Hin, a beach town on the Gulf of Thailand. As we left the airport and stepped into Hua Hin, it felt like we were entering Florida. Palm trees, humid weather, and countless tourists excited to begin their vacation. So many familiar things, but also quite foreign at the same time. I couldn’t read any signs, the roads and driving patterns were quite different, and I didn’t recognize many of the storefront brands.

One of my favorite parts about international travel is that literally everything we do is new to me. It’s a constant reminder about how much I don’t know. Even a trip to the grocery store unearths new finds and curiosities. Life can feel so repetitive at times. The same roads, the same buildings, the same routines. Then when we travel abroad, every little bit of our day is unfamiliar, maybe uncomfortable, and extremely interesting. As I sit here writing this, I’m watching a sport I’ve never seen (or even heard of). Indoor soccer on a basketball court with a tiny little soccer ball. These players are like magicians, maneuvering this familiar but unfamiliar ball on a court that’s also familiar (but not).

The more I learn, the more I realize how much I don’t know. It’s a humbling feeling, but also exciting. It’s a constant reminder that we’ve only scratched the surface of life. We can choose to fall into what’s normal and comfortable each day, or we can choose to learn something new by putting ourselves in unfamiliar and uncomfortable situations. I need to do that more often in my day-to-day life. If you ever see me in the street, ask me how I’m doing with it. It’s an endeavor worth pursuing.

Does Your Work Matter?

Does your work matter? I’m not going to define what that means for you, but I can tell you it does NOT mean simply getting paid. Getting paid doesn’t mean your work doesn’t matter. I know people who make little who’s work doesn’t matter to them and I know people who make a lot who’s work matters very much to them….and vice versa. It’s not really about the money. With that, I’ll ask again: Does your work matter?

Over the last few days, I’ve met with countless people in Thailand who are aggressively pursuing work that matters. It’s often not fun work, and rarely is it easy work. But wow, their work matters! They feel a unique and powerful call for their current and/or upcoming work. This work can be counter-cultural, volatile, and anything but secure. They share stories of pain, suffering, and exhaustion. But when you ask them how they feel about it, their eyes light up. There’s a passion behind those eyes that’s difficult to put into words.

It’s humbling, honestly. When I hear about their work, it can quickly make me feel less than about my own work. They are heroes to me, while I’m just some dude over here in America talking about money. However, I also realize I’m doing the exact work I’m called to do……and it’s not my job to compare myself to them. We each have our own skills, passions, relationships, and influence. It’s our job to put them to the best use. If they do their work that matters, I do my work that matters, and you do your work that matters, together we will make this world a better place. Have an awesome day!

Curse of Comparison: Doha Airport Edition

We just spent a 3-hour layover in the Doha airport. As an aside, the Doha airport is a sight to behold. Take the best airport in America, then make it 18x better, and you have the Doha airport. It’s nice in almost every way. It’s clean, it’s pretty, it’s full of amenities, and the service is fantastic. The multiple bathroom attendants in every bathroom show more hospitality and service than some nicer restaurants I frequent. I always love spending time there. But it also has another quirk. It’s jam-packed with high-end retail. Think of it as walking down Rodeo Drive, but in an airport in the Middle East. They have Maseratis and McLarens in the duty-free shop, for crying out loud!

But this post is about something specific I witnessed. There was a lot of this happening, but I’m talking about one particular man. Like us, he was killing a few hours between flights. He was in one of the watch stores, just browsing. A certain watch caught his eye. In his defense, it was a pretty sweet watch. In a snap decision, he decided to buy it……for $20,000!!!! That’s right. A man just burning time between flights was window shopping, and impulsively bought a $20,000 watch, just because. 

These are the moments when comparison hits hard. Sarah and I’s cars don’t even combine for $20,000 of value. And this man just drops $20,000 on a whim? In those moments, it’s really easy to play the jealousy card. It’s easy to immediately feel negative about our own life. It’s easy to wish we could have a different existence. This is where I come back to meaning over money. I don’t know anything about this man. He may be the happiest guy on the planet…..or the most miserable. His life might be full of broken relationships, loneliness, and emptiness. I don’t wish that upon him, but I simply don’t know.

Here’s what I do know. I know I love my life. Even though I can’t impulsively buy a $20,000 watch, I know I wake up every day excited to serve those who I wish to serve. I have a wonderful family that I can financially take care of. I’m blessed in so many ways. I could choose to compare, but instead I’m choosing to not. I need to focus on what I do have, not what I don’t. 

We don’t need to be in a high-end watch store to feel this tension. At some level, we feel it every day. In those moments, big or small, we get to make our choice. Choose carefully.

Adventure (Not) For Adventure's Sake

As Sarah and I embark on our Asia trip, I’m sitting in the airport thinking about how much I missed international travel these past few years. I missed so much about it. The discomfort, the culture, the food, the sights, the history, the experiences……all of it! To be frank, travel is one of my favorite things.

But that’s also when I take a step back and ask myself why I enjoy traveling so much. For some, travel is adventure for adventure’s sake. To an extent, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with this. We should go enjoy life and have fun. I have no doubt about that. I support it, encourage it, and practice it. However, there’s a movement in our culture to make travel a lifestyle. The continual search for the next high. More adrenaline, more Instagram posts, more escapism.

I can see the allure of this approach…..it can be intoxicating. However, it can quickly become another way for us to selfishly hoard our resources and keep the focus on ourselves rather than others. While this type of life may be fun, if we pursue a life that’s simply about meeting our desires, we’re probably missing the meaning part.

What’s the alternative? For me, I try to view travel as something bigger. Yes, I’m going to have fun. Sarah and I have already had a blast on our first day of flights. But my bigger purpose has a few sides to it. The primary objective of this trip is to further an organization I’m involved in. We have some key meetings that will help shape its next chapter. It’s also an opportunity to spend time with our staff and the other leaders. These relationships matter so much to me. These people went from strangers, to colleagues, to friends, to family. I also want to invest in my marriage. Sarah doesn’t get the attention from me she deserves. This will be a good opportunity for her and I to bond, child-free. Lastly, I find that I become better (in many ways) when I experience other cultures. By understanding how people live, the things they value, and how they operate, I can learn, grow, and become a better version of myself. I trust I’ll come back from this trip with new ideas, a clearer sense of my mission, and better equipped to serve those who I wish to serve.

It’s adventure, but not for adventure’s sake.

Chaos: The Entry Price to Meaning

As I’m writing this, I’m mere hours from hopping onto an international flight where my wife and I will spend some time in Asia and the Middle East. To be honest, I’m stressed. Between packing, trying to get time with the kids, meeting with clients, running errands, and preparing for some upcoming speaking engagements, it’s been a lot to handle. Probably too much. Strike that…..definitely too much.

If I’m being honest with myself, my life could be significantly less chaotic. I could settle into a more stable job, I could say “no” to the various organizations I serve, and I could hunker down with my family where the schedule would be much more predictable. For better or worse, chaos is the entry price to a life of meaning. I probably don’t help myself at times, but some level of chaos is what we signed up for when we chose this life.

Some days I wish it away. Some days I just want to quit. Some days I yearn for a simpler existence. Then, I have a conversation with a client and remember why I do what I do. Then, I wrap up a board meeting and am reminded why I’m serving that organization. Then, I walk off the stage from a speaking engagement and recognize why I spent all that time preparing. Every step of the way, when doubt seeps in, something happens to affirm why I do what I do. Each time that happens, I realize chaos is the entry price to a life of meaning. It’s hard, but worth it.

Riding a Bicycle is Like Riding a Bicycle

I went bike shopping with my kids the other day. Two years ago, we purchased a couple of used bikes off Facebook Marketplace for maybe $50 total. To be honest, these bikes were nearing the end of their life when we got them. They were great first bikes and they most certainly served their purpose. But I promised the boys brand new, hand-chosen bikes for this coming season. They can now ride fully independently, I too love riding bikes, and we now live two blocks from the best bike trail in the state. Needless to say, I’m pumped!

As we were walking through the store, Pax expressed some anxiety about the whole ordeal. “What if I forgot how to ride a bike? What if I can’t do it?” I quickly responded, “it’s like riding a bike.” He stared blankly at me, clearly not understanding my bad joke. You know the expression! Riding a bike is one of those things we quickly pick back up. We can go months or years without riding one, then the moment we hop back on it’s like we never stopped. Call it muscle memory. Call it instinct. Call it magic.

We don’t study to ride a bike, researching the how-tos and techniques for hours on Google and YouTube. We learn to ride a bike by failing to ride a bike. We get on, pedal 20 feet, careen into a ditch, get up, and try it again. Failure after failure, we learn to stay up. Then just like that, we know how to ride. There’s never a moment where we say, “Oh, 5 failures from now I’ll know how to ride it.” We just keep failing until we stop failing. Then we never look back.

Money, work, and life are much the same way. We can research it until the cows come home, but it won’t teach us how to live it. We need to hop on the proverbial bike, scrape our knees, then try again. Each time, we’ll get just a little bit better……until one day we’re soaring down the bike trail of life with the wind in our face and the sun shining down.

Some of you have a bike you’re scared to hop on. You’re terrified of scraping your knees up. You will. You’re nervous you won’t be very good. You won’t be. You think the process will be uncomfortable. It will be. But if you’re willing to get scraped up a few times, you’ll be soaring in no time!

It’s like riding a bike!

The Dreaded B-Word

I talk about budgeting every single day. It’s a cornerstone of my coaching. It’s not because I especially love budgeting, but rather because of how important it is. It’s so important, in my perspective, that we need to get that right if we want to achieve the other financial goals in our life. People will often tell me they do great without a budget. That may be partially true, but they also don’t know what they don’t know. From my experience, they are driving a 5-speed transmission but only think it has 3 gears. 3rd gear feels really fast if you’ve never experienced a 4th or 5th gear. Something very powerful is unlocked when budgeting is done right.

I get it, the idea of budgeting is terrible. Most people (fairly) assume budgeting will suck the fun out of their life. That’s simply how budgeting is approached by the vast majority of our financial world. Stop spending, be responsible, cut back. We treat it as a crash diet. I think we’re missing the point. The objective of a budget isn’t to spend less, but rather to spend better. It’s a way to live out our values. So through the lens of “spend less”, yeah, I’d hate budgeting, too. But through the lens of “spend better”, budgeting gives us life. It’s a tangible way to execute our hopes, dreams, values, and principles.

Last week, one of my 6-year-olds approached me and asked, “Daddy, when is the end of the month?” When I asked him why, he responded, “because I want to go to Chuck-E-Cheese and thought we could put Chuck-E-Cheese in the new budget.” “Yeah, bud, let’s put it in the budget next month. That will be a lot of fun. What else should we put into the budget?”

Even at 6, he’s realizing this money stuff shouldn’t suck. It shouldn’t rip the fun and enjoyment out of life. It shouldn’t hinder our ability to live a quality life. He’s already learning that it’s a way that we can intentionally plan for fun things and live out our family’s values.

As this week begins, I encourage you to look at money through the lens of “spend better”, not “spend less.”

Hopping Into the Delorean

Nearly every time I start working with a new client, they make the statement, “I wish someone would have shown this to me when I was younger.” This comes out of the mouths of people in their 50s, 40s, 30s, and even late 20s. Almost without fail, people have this moment when they realize how much better their financial life or career would be had they implemented some of these ideas earlier in life. My moment came when I was 28 years old. I was still pretty young, but I had already made multiple life-altering financial mistakes. If only I could get a do-over!

Unfortunately, none of us can hop into our Delorean, accelerate to 88 MPH, and tell our younger selves the secrets of a better way. On the other hand, we actually do! We all have young people in our lives who we love. I think about my youth group kids, nieces, friends’ children, and other friends who are (much) younger than me. “I wish someone would have shown this to me when I was younger.” We may not be younger, but these other people are! Each of us has an opportunity to help shift the life trajectory of the young people in our lives. Even just one little conversation could be transformational for their journey. Words are free and words are powerful.

I’ll leave you with one story. Several years ago, I was paddling a canoe in the Minnesotan wilderness with a young man I had just met the day before. We used that opportunity to get to know one another. We talked about sports, family, passions, dreams, and probably a whole lot more. I really enjoyed that time with him, but I don’t have any significant memories of that particular conversation.

About 12-18 months later, out of the blue, I received a thank you card in the mail. It was from that same young man! in it, he explained how that conversation in the canoe changed his life. I shared ideas, encouragement, and advice that would go on to fundamentally shift the way he perceived his money and career. The rest is history, as they say. To me, it was a casual conversation. To him, it was so much more. I love that guy and I’m so proud of him! He’s now like a little brother to me and one of the great blessings of my life is to watch him thrive. Words are powerful and words are free.

Hop into the Delorean and bless those young people in your life! It will change their lives…..and possibly yours as well!

The Relentless Pursuit of Better

My guy Alex Prins was just featured on the Creatives POV podcast. As a general rule of thumb, if someone I know is on a podcast, I’m listening. Having been in that world for some time now, I know there’s something about that particular medium that brings a bit extra out of people. Perhaps it’s the intimacy of a podcast setting, or the storytelling nature of the format, but people usually share some interesting tidbits about their life that I didn’t already know. Alex’s episode was no different.

As I’m listening, all I could think about was Alex’s relentless pursuit of better. At every step of his young career, he could have said, “yeah, this is good enough.” Then, he could have promptly taken his foot off the gas and coasted for as long as possible. That could be a safe, comfortable, secure, and very normal way to approach his career. Truth is, it would have eventually made him miserable. Had he taken the easy way, he may have settled for an industry he wasn’t meant for. Or, he could have locked into a comfort zone and merely tolerated the work, constantly dreaming about the day when he could finally retire and “enjoy his life.” Either act would have equated to him sacrificing meaning and purpose for indifference and mediocrity.

To be honest, Alex has no idea how hard this path will be for him. It will most certainly be brutal at times. There will surely be days when he wishes he would just settle into “normal.” On the other side of the coin, Alex has no idea how amazing this journey is yet to become. He has 40-50 good years left in him, so he’s only midway through the first quarter of the game.

If Alex came to me tomorrow to tell me he’s joining the circus, I wouldn’t be surprised and I probably wouldn’t doubt him. He’s one of those people who practice the relentless pursuit of better. That’s never a straight line, and rarely goes how we think it should. It’s exciting, terrifying, and sometimes messy. It won’t always be pretty, but it will always be worth it.

Investing in Memories: Reader Edition

I often talk about the idea of investing in memories. I cover it in my speaking, podcast, and in this blog (including HERE, HERE, HERE, and HERE). Investing our resources in memories, I believe, is one of the keys to living with meaning. Our stuff ends up in a landfill, but our memories last a lifetime.

With that in mind, something fun happened this past week. Three different readers shared a recent situation in their life pertaining to this very topic. One took their grandkids to a fairly expensive event, one attended the NFC championship game, and one splurged for Hamilton tickets on Broadway while in NYC. I absolutely loved hearing each of these stories. All three included a similar sequence of events:

• The price tags gave them sticker shock

• It wasn’t something they would normally do

• There was some anxiety about the decision

• They went for it!

• It was amazing

• Zero regrets

• “I will remember that forever”……..or some variation of that comment

Beautiful stuff! I’m so glad they said “yes” to memories. What memories have you invested in lately? If you haven’t, what are you waiting for!?!? Make some plans, big or small, and go for it!

Creating Margin for Impact

I talk a lot about the idea of creating margin in our finances. We do this to provide peace, flexibility, and contentment. However, there’s a piece missing from the typical narrative of margin. All these positive consequences of creating margin are about me, me, and me. One of the hidden benefits of creating margin in our own lives is the opportunity to lift others up. When we live with financial margin, we can provide financial assistance to the struggling single mother. When we live with time margin, we can serve in our local church or a local non-profit. When we live with career margin, we allow ourselves the ability to say “yes” to new opportunities to put our talents to use.

Herein lies the problem. We humans don’t do a great job living with margin. Some of the highest earners I know give very little in the form of generosity. It’s not that they are greedy, selfish people. Rather, despite their high incomes, they’ve created a life for themselves with little margin. Some of the most servant-hearted people I know don’t serve. It’s not because they don’t care. Rather, despite their passion to help others, they are simply too busy to make it happen. Some of the most talented people I know don’t use their gifts outside of their primary vocation. It’s not that they don’t want to make a difference. Rather, despite their hyper self-awareness of their gifts, they’ve overcommitted to their jobs and there’s simply no more energy or time in their lives to use the gifts elsewhere.

Put another way, our ability to be generous and impactful is far less tied to our resources and talent than our willingness to create margin in our lives. Margin = service. Margin = impact. Margin = love.

Wanna Be Like Mike

When I was a kid, I remember watching and re-watching an epic Gatorade commercial featuring Michael Jordan. Here’, I’ll jog your memory:

Everyone wanted to be like Mike, and so did I! After all, he IS the GOAT! Eventually, though, I realized I probably wouldn’t be all that much like Mike. My growth spurt stopped at 5’9”, I entered my 40s, and my jumper is a tad (ok, a ton) rusty. I suspect my NBA dreams died before they had a chance to flourish. I’ll take that one up with my therapist.

I have so many fond memories of that Mike, but today I’m talking about a different Mike. This Mike is a high school teacher with a passion for young people. He spends his livelihood equipping teens to be good stewards with their money and careers. He’s a connector, a leader, and an encourager. The last part is where I want to focus today. Mike is a masterful encourager. I’ve seen it with his students and I’ve experienced it first-hand. This guy went from stranger, to acquaintance, to friend, to brother in a matter of about six months. Every time I see him, he’s exploding with energy, has an insightful idea for me to consider, and somehow lifts me up. Even a 30-second interaction with him makes my day better.

When I’m feeling fatigued, doubtful, or defeated, Mike seems to pop out of nowhere with the best encouragement. He often seems like my biggest cheerleader, but I suspect others would say the very same thing about him. That’s why I wanna be like Mike. He has a gift, and he uses it to make this world a better place. In some ways, I feel like I do some of these things, too……but someday I hope to do them as well as Mike does. That’s the impact people like Mike can have. Their mere presence in other people’s lives has the power to multiply that very spirit of love and generosity. What a gift!

When I used to wanna be like Mike, it meant hitting a soul-crushing buzzer-beater over Craig Ehlo’s dome. Today, when I wanna be like Mike, it means I want to make an impact on those around me, creating a multiplying and lasting difference in this world.

Slow Down or Get Burned

We recently made a bad decision in one of my businesses. It’s not a life-threatening mistake, but it was serious enough to cause some heartburn and consequences. We haven’t made many bad decisions in the past, but this one was a doozie. In the moment I kind of knew there would be regrets, for one specific reason. We rushed to make a decision and did so under pressure.

Us humans rarely make good decisions when we’re under duress or facing time constraints. It’s a concept I talk to clients about all the time, yet here I was falling for the same trap. This topic is so, so, so important. Think back to the financial and career decisions you regret. Were you under stress or experiencing pressure to make a quick decision? The answer is probably “yes” in most cases. Common examples of bad financial decisions revolve around the following situations:

• When we’re faced with a car accident or significant repair needs, which often leads us to quickly buy a vehicle we can’t afford.

• When we’re house shopping and the seller’s agent tells us there are a few other offers on the table already, forcing us to make a snap decision.

• When we experience a major medical or relational situation, resulting in us making impulsive financial decisions to self-medicate the pain.

• When someone offers us a job but they need to know by the end of the day.

One of my primary objectives when working with clients is getting them to slow down, take their time, and be intentional about their decisions. It’s a simple concept, but it’s easier said than done when life is moving fast and feeling chaotic. There are probably 10-20 decisions made (or not made) each year that have the power to significantly alter our financial journey. If we can slow down and get those right (or at least not get them wrong), our future selves will be grateful.

Have an awesome and intentional day!

"They Only Care About Money"

I thoroughly enjoyed watching the AFC and NFC title games yesterday, especially the AFC game. The way the Chiefs won was as equally euphoric as the Bengals loss was crushing. Sometimes I get so overwhelmed by these moments that I can’t sleep when lay my head on the pillow. Last night was no different. I had so many thoughts running through my head.

“They only care about money.” These are words that are often spoken about professional athletes…..and most other wealthy people. Perhaps it’s our culture’s way of demeaning someone who has something we don’t, but we love to put a superficial, materialistic label on people who have achieved financial success. Truth is, I think we have it backward. Instead of looking at them through the lens of only caring about money, perhaps we should consider their massive success (financial and otherwise) is because they actually care so much. After all, when we’re talking about the top of the top of the top echelon of achievers, the allure of money can’t propel one to get to that level. Money isn’t a motivator, but rather a product of the motivation put into action.

This was on full display immediately following the Chiefs/Bengals game. Players on both sides were sobbing. Some were sobbing from the devastation of defeat, while some were sobbing from utter joy. But we’re collectively going to label them as only caring about money?

We see contracts, cars, clothes, houses, and commercials, but rarely see the tens of thousands of hours of practice, studying, and repetition that got them here. We see their masterful achievements, but we don’t see the sacrifice behind closed doors. We see the fame, but we didn’t see everything they went through before they were household names.

Instead of demeaning successful people, maybe we should learn from them. Instead of criticizing them, maybe we should be inspired by them. Instead of telling ourselves they only care about money, maybe we should realize their financial success may be a result of how much they truly care about their craft.

There is No Impact Without Failure

During yesterday’s keynote address at a high school FBLA conference, I stressed the importance of failing. We live in a culture that tells us to avoid failure. Even parents protect their children from failing these days. Not only do I dislike this mindset, but I actually think we should pursue failure. In my talk, I shared two primary reasons why failure is important on our journey:

1. There’s nothing worth doing that doesn’t involve the risk of failing. I jokingly mentioned there was still a chance I would botch my talk and completely humiliate myself. However, there was one surefire way I could have avoided the risk of failure. I could have simply stayed home, which would be much safer and ensured nothing bad could have happened to me. On the flip side, staying home also meant I had a zero percent chance of making an impact. You can’t have one without the other.

2. When we fail, we learn. Failing is never fun, but it stretches us and helps us grow. When we put ourselves in uncomfortable situations and force ourselves to figure it out, we will absolutely fail from time to time. Simultaneously, we’ll also learn, adapt, and stretch ourselves. That’s exactly why something that may be uncomfortable at first eventually becomes comfortable. In the absence of failure, there’s an absence of growth.

I’ll leave you with the wise words of the GOAT, Mr. Air Jordan. “I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. And 26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life, and that is why I succeed.”

Delayed Gratification

Later today, I’ll be delivering the keynote address at a Future Business Leaders of America conference. It will be comprised of 150-300 high school students interested in pursuing business careers. I’ll be talking about three myths I believed when I was younger, and why overcoming them can be transformational for their journey.

One topic I’ll bring up is delayed gratification. As humans, especially as young adult humans, we want what we want…..and we want it now. We also live in a culture that is tailored to give us the instant gratification we desire. Unfortunately, the important things in life rarely provide instant gratification. It’s a slow burn of patience, discipline, persistence, and maybe a bit more patience.

As I reflect back on some of my successes, it dawned on me just how patient I was (even if it didn’t feel like it at the time):

• I offered financial coaching as a free ministry for more than six years before someone paid me to do it. Those years allowed me the opportunity to serve people well, learn my craft, carve out my approach, and discern my desired client base.

• I gave 95 talks before someone paid me to speak. I suspect the first 30+ were terrible! Every repetition allowed me to get comfortable on the stage, try new techniques, and find my voice.

• We’ve produced nearly 200 podcast episodes and haven’t made a single penny in revenue. That’s more than 60 hours of free content, available to the world. Maybe someday we’ll decide to create an income from the podcast, but until then our goal is to find our audience, add a ton of value to people’s lives, and start to bend the culture when it comes to work and money.

Patience isn’t easy, but it does get easier if we remember our why. My why is to make the deepest and broadest impact possible over the next 40 years. When I remind myself of this, it’s far easier to remain patient and keep my eyes focused on what truly matters (and what doesn’t).

The Problem With More

We have a “more” problem in our culture. In nearly every facet of our lives, it becomes about having, getting, making, and doing more, more, and more. The problem with more is that every time we get more, more is still, well, more.

Once we set ourselves down the path to more, there’s no natural endpoint. It’s an infinite game with no real winners. No matter the job we possess, there’s always one that pays more. No matter the phone we buy, there’s always a shinier, faster one coming out next week. No matter the restaurant we go to, there’s always something trendier. No matter the vacation we take, there’s always something more exotic.

Then, there are cars and houses. People can’t get enough when it comes to their vehicles. Newer, bigger, sleeker vehicles with enough high-tech features to launch a man to the moon. Then, the mother of all more, our houses. When people are looking to buy a house, one popular phrase they throw into the mix is “our forever home.” Every time this is proclaimed, I’m quick to say, “no, it’s not.” Why? Because more is always more. Inevitably, in most cases, these “forever homes” become former homes in just a handful of years, as the goal post of what satisfies shifted upwards mere months after moving into the so-called “forever home.”

This is the problem with more. There’s no way to psychologically combat this very human quirk. However, we do have a choice on the table: step out of the madness and choose not to participate in the pursuit of more. It’s a simple, yet profound idea that can fundamentally transform people’s lives. It changed mine, it’s changed countless families I work with, and it can change yours.

Even Robots Know My Weaknesses

There’s nothing quite like the pain of having to listen to your own voice or watch yourself on video. Every word, motion, tone, and nuance gets put under a microscope. And not just any microscope, but an unfair, distorted, and brutally critical microscope. Can we all just admit it sucks to watch and listen to ourselves?

When we started producing content for Meaning Over Money, I played a strong role in the editing process. Cole eventually kicked me out of that role, citing my need to trust him and his need to not deal with me. But those days of editing were telling for me. Watching myself and listening to myself helped me clearly see where my deficiencies were. I learned so much from that experience, and it honestly helped me get better every step of the way. Though I don’t watch or listen to all my own content anymore, I do absorb most of it at some point. A funny thing happened along the way. Now, when I’m absorbing my own content, it’s not me. It’s just some other guy who I’m experiencing as a consumer. It almost feels like a different person. It sounds weird - and it is - but it’s helped me become constructively critical instead of toxically critical.

Here’s the thing with our weaknesses. We may not always know them, but everyone around us does. If you’re ever brave enough, ask someone to share what yours are. It can be a brutal experience, but just like my story above, it can help us grow. A few nights ago, I was messing around with ChatGPT and trying to generate some ideas. Out of curiosity, I fed it my most recent blog post and asked it to “tell me how I can improve it.” The following is what the AI robot spit back out at me:

Here are a few suggestions on how you can improve the text:

1. Use more active voice: The text is written in passive voice in certain parts. Use more active voice to make the text more engaging and direct.

2. Use specific examples: The text could benefit from more specific examples of how the author's skills, experience, influence, and relationships from their previous career have helped them in their new career. This will make the text more relatable and convincing.

3. Be more concise: The text can be made more concise by eliminating unnecessary details and focusing on the main points.

4. Use transitions: The text may flow more smoothly if you use transitions between paragraphs and sections to guide the reader through the story and the author's thought process.

5. Be more specific in the end: The end of the text is a bit generic, it could be more specific if the author provides some tips or examples of how someone else can take the same approach to their own career shift.

Keep in mind that these suggestions are based on the text you provided, and the final decision on how to improve it is yours. These are just suggestions that you can use to make your text more engaging and effective.

Ouch! My gut reaction was, “What do you know? You’re just a stupid robot!” Then, I looked back and forth between its feedback and my article. If I’m being honest with myself, that feedback was 100% accurate. The truth hurts, but we have two options: 1) ignore it and be defensive, or 2) accept it and use it to grow.

I don’t always choose route #2, but my prayer today is to do it more consistently each day.

Confronting Fear Head-On

I’m scheduled to deliver two talks this week. One is at a high school youth group and the other is a keynote address at a high school leadership conference. I couldn’t be more excited about these opportunities. They also kick off a series of speaking engagements I have lined up for the spring.

Confession: public speaking is my biggest fear. Ironic, I know. Several years ago, I had a strong desire to combat my fear of speaking. I knew I would be doing some level of public speaking in my career, and didn’t want to bomb, so I looked for opportunities to speak to other audiences as practice. I was a mess the first time I spoke on stage. Vomit was involved…..and sweating….and shaky hands……and stuttering. Did I mention it was a mess? I hope no footage exists of that first one.

Then I did it again, then again, then again. Each time, I performed a little better and I was a bit less terrified. Before I knew it, it went from my biggest fear to something I get excited about. For me, there’s nothing quite like the rush of knowing I have 30 minutes of people’s attention to possibly make an impact. Equal parts responsibility and opportunity. I still get nervous, and I’d definitely still call public speaking my greatest fear (well maybe #2 after snakes).

I don’t do it as much as I should, but I’m a big believer in confronting fear head-on. I have a list of things I’m scared to do, and hopefully I’ll get the courage to attack each one soon. I’ll end by sharing one. I don’t do well being in the wilderness, especially if it involves being wet and cold. I’ve addressed this fear somewhat through a men’s ministry trip I take each fall to the Boundary Waters. I used to be terrified of that trip. But now, I actually enjoy it (sort of). That means it’s time to step it up. Sometime soon, I’m going to do a solo trip into the wilderness. Just me, a canoe, whatever is in my pack, and three days of isolation. Just typing that scares me to death. That’s a good sign I should probably get to planning.

What about you? What fears do you want to confront?