The Cure for Self-Pity
If you've been following along the past 30 days, you know that this hasn't exactly been the most magical holiday season of my life. Between my Black Friday neck injury and the constant sickness that's worked its way through my family, we cancelled nearly every meaningful holiday event on our schedule. This trend continued on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, with Sarah being completely bedridden with the flu. She was able to get up long enough to open presents yesterday morning, but that's about it.
Needless to say, our annual holiday traditions were knocked off-balance. Instead of the four of us attending Christmas Eve service and enjoying dinner at a local Chinese restaurant, we shifted gears. The boys and I attended an earlier Christmas Eve service, and after taking an informal vote, we ended up dining at our favorite local pizzeria.
Our lives were in such disarray that I felt more like Scott Calvin taking Charlie to Denny's on Christmas Eve than anything that resembled a happy little family.
I gotta be honest, it's all been terrible. This was easily the hardest holiday season of my life. In some ways, I woke up this morning with a feeling of mourning about what never was. It was all so dang hard.
One thing I realized about 10 years ago is that while I can't necessarily change all the circumstances happening to me, I can change the circumstances happening to others. Generosity always wins, and there's no cure for self-pity better than finding ways to practice generosity.
Every time we were faced with tough circumstances over the past few weeks, I'd try to find ways for our family to practice unreasonable generosity. It was especially fun bringing the kids into the fold, allowing them to be at the center of the gifts. They were able to observe people's reactions when something unexpected happened. They saw the smiles, the tears, the laughs, the gasps, and the thank-you's.
While I still feel a cloud of sadness about all that's happened recently, I can rest comfortably knowing that, even though my own personal circumstances felt terrible, we were able to move the needle in other people's lives along the way. We got over ourselves and our own self-pity, and showed love and compassion to people who might have needed it as much as we did. We may never fully know the impact we had in these moments, but it's not our job to know. Our job is to give, trust, give, trust, and give some more. We'll let God sort out the rest. I hope you do the same.
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