Exhibit #975

I talk often about the hidden psychological forces that influence our daily habits and decision-making. These hidden forces play a much larger role in our lives than we'd like to admit, and most people won't admit it. Today, I'd like to talk about Exhibit #975. Is it really #975? Not sure....I'm just guessing at this point!

I recently stumbled upon a social media video in which a woman asked, "If you were offered a free vacation, but you weren't allowed to post any photos of the vacation on social media, would you still go?" She continued by saying that she would feel that a trip without social media photos would be "a waste," and thus would decline.

My first reaction to her question was, "Of course I’d go! In fact, I'd prefer not to share a single photo of my trip! Double win!"

I saw lots of similar remarks in her comments. However, the vast majority of people agreed with her. If you can't post photos of your trip on social media, what's the point? Thousands of people chimed in, arguing that there's not much of a point in going on a vacation if you can't share content from it. Many people said they'd rather pay to go on the same trip so they can post whatever they want.

Depending on the study, 45%-55% of Millennials and Gen Z care about their vacations looking good on social media. Some even select their travel destinations solely for the aesthetics of the soon-to-be social media posts. In other surveys, approximately 20% of people admit to posting photos to boast, while another 10% admit to posting photos to incite jealousy from their friends, family, and colleagues. Here’s another fun one. 75% of people say they get annoyed when friends and family post vacation photos, yet even so, 75% of those annoyed people will do the same by posting their own photos. It’s a social media arms race of vacation photos!

We, humans, are a weird bunch. Now, regardless of what side of the aisle you land on with this question, this is another piece of evidence illustrating just how much we're being influenced by culture. You and I might not be struck by this particular ridiculous affliction, but we're struck by some other, equally ridiculous afflictions. Somewhere, deep down in our psyche, we're being manipulated by a combination of our culture and our subconscious.

Maybe it's the vehicles we're buying. Maybe it's the houses we're living in. Maybe it's the clothes we're wearing. Maybe it's the clubs we're joining. Maybe it's the technology we're using. I'm not suggesting that we ought to stop being impacted by these forces. If we're human, it's inescapable. Instead, what I'm suggesting is that we become aware of it in our own lives. Once we have awareness, we can take it into account in our decision-making process and make better choices.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

An Accidental Insult

I recently ran into an acquaintance at a local bookstore near my house. To be more specific, I ran into this acquaintance at the local bookstore twice within a month. During our second encounter, this person said to me, "Thanks for supporting this small business." Ugh!

I couldn't hate that phrase any more. "Support." The mere idea that I "support" that bookstore would be an insult to the shop's owner. I don't go to that bookstore to "support" them. I go there because they are excellent at what they do. The shop has a great vibe, the selection is always vast and ever-changing, the owner treats me like family, and the prices are too appealing to pass up. I've purchased hundreds of books from them, and God willing, I'll purchase several hundred more.

The mere idea that I "support" them is an insult, an accidental insult. They don't get my business out of pity, guilt, or some sense that if I don't go there, they won't make it. Instead, they served me extraordinarily well and earned the right for me to come back. Each time I visit, they re-earn the right again. That's how excellence works. They don't lather the pity, guilt, or emotional heartstrings on social media to get people in the door. They just pursue excellence in what they do and let the experiences speak for themselves.

Please remember this when you consider telling someone to "support" a small business. In that message is the presumption that their business isn't good enough without you or other people going there out of pity or guilt. Here's an alternative. If you know a small business that practices excellence, tell that to people. Shout from the rooftops how amazing a business is and how their lives will be better if they engage with said businesses. That's beautiful. It's pure, honest, and deserving. Always point back toward excellence, then let those businesses earn the right for your friends and family to go back again.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Pax: Make Good Choices

It's the middle of the night. We had a marathon night with the kids (and our nieces). An awesome night, full of fresh memories and new experiences. I'm dead tired; the brain is shutting down. Pax is lying next to me. "Dad, you still need to write your blog, don't you?"

"Yeah, bud, I do. Any ideas?"

"I've never written a blog before, so I don't know what to write about."

"Well, I want to help people and encourage them."

"Tell them to have a good day and make good choices. You always tell me to make good choices, so maybe you can tell them that."

Make good choices. Such a simple, yet difficult idea. None of us ventures into our days planning to make poor choices. We don't wake up in the morning looking to sabotage our lives or impair our futures. Yet, we regularly find ourselves doing just that. Why? I think much of this stems from our human desire for instant gratification. We willfully do things to get what we want now, at the expense of what we want most.

I'm sure you can relate. You have a list of things that are important to you, yet through the course of life, you make little decisions in the present that push those important things further into the future.

Make good choices. I love that it was the first idea that came to his little mind when he thought about the blog. Ironic, though, as he frequently makes bad choices. I guess that makes him just like you and just like me. Despite wanting to make good choices, he can't help himself at times. None of us is ever going to get it fully right, but perhaps we can endeavor to make more good choices than poor ones today. Here's my rule of thumb for good choices: Would 10 years from now me approve of this choice? If so, it's probably a good choice. If not, well, perhaps I should reconsider.

Have a good day and make good choices, as Pax would say.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

26 and Dreaming

I recently met with a young 26-year-old man who was interested in having me review his finances and give him a few pointers. Early in the conversation, I asked the same question I always ask: "How about your work? Tell me about your work."

He danced around the point for a few minutes, sharing little details about all the compensation and benefits he receives from his employer. He never really answered my question, so I asked again. "How do you really feel about your work?"

"Honestly, I dream about retirement every day." He continued to share about how he doesn't find any meaning in his job, but it pays well and feels secure, so if he just sticks with it, he'll probably be able to retire by 60 at the latest.

This young guy is just three years into his career, and he's already dreaming about quitting work 34 years from now?!?! As much as I'd like to say this guy is weird, his sentiment is shared by millions. He's already conceded that he's going to hate work for the next 3+ decades, but his longing for an eventual life of leisure will hopefully pull him through.

He asked me if his math about how he can retire by age 60 is wrong. It wasn't. The math is fine. Sure, he can absolutely follow this plan and "finally" quit working by age 60, but I had something else to add: "I think you deserve far better than this plan. I think you deserve to wake up every day for the next 34 years excited for what you're about to do."

He thought that was an absurd idea. He had never considered that to be a viable option. It's interesting what our culture tells us. What will he do? Only time will tell. He can absolutely retire by his mid-to-late 50s if he really wants, but I think burning the next 30 years of his life would be a shame.

I think he deserves better. I think you deserve better. I think I deserve better. The only question is whether each of us will pursue that better.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

If Everything Is Important…..

I received a half-dozen messages yesterday in defense of the family I discussed in yesterday’s post. In short, people defended this family's actions by saying that all of these things were important. Thus, this family was simply a victim of having all these important things stacked on them.

Here's a general truth. If everything is important, nothing is important. Let's say there are 50 different things vying for our time or money, and all of them are deemed "important." If they all occupy the same plane of importance, then none of them are actually important. In a world of relativity, none of them win.

This is the curse that strikes so many of us. Our budgets are living testimonies of this. For example, I'll regularly meet people who are actively saving for 15 different things—$ 25 here, $30 there. When I do the math, I point out to them that it will take years to knock out any of them. That becomes immensely frustrating, eventually defeating.

For this reason, we need to truly prioritize. Are some of these things in our lives needs and wants? Yes. That's totally cool. Allow them to live in our hearts and minds. However, we need to be honest with ourselves when setting priorities. Once we have our list of upcoming needs and wants, do whatever it takes to prioritize them so your values can be lived out.

If everything is important, nothing is important. Therefore, keep it simple, prioritize, and execute. Confidently knock out the most important goal, then move on to the next.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

There’s Always Something

A couple I know has some big aspirations. Their values and goals are clear, and they know what it will take to achieve them financially. One problem: something came up. An unexpected need arose, and they must delay this goal until they address it.

Here's another problem: this is only the most recent in a string of unexpected needs. Truth be told, they've been putting off this big, important dream for more than six years! Why? There's always something!

I'll illustrate for you.

• First, they decided that buying a new vehicle was an immediate need. $27,000 of saving, 15 months of time, and another $35,000 of vehicle debt later, they had their new vehicle and were ready to achieve their dream.

• Second, they decided that buying a house was an immediate need. $20,000 of saving and 12 months of time later, they had their house and were ready to achieve their dream.

• Third, they decided that a dream Disney vacation was an immediate need. $18,000 of saving and 11 months of time later, they took their trip and were ready to achieve their dream.

• Fourth, they decided that finishing their basement was an immediate need. $40,000 of saving and 18 months of time later, they had their new basement and were ready to achieve their dream.

• Fifth, they decided that buying the other spouse a new vehicle is an immediate need. They are currently saving for this. But once they have this new vehicle, they will be ready to achieve their dream......

There's always something! When asked why they haven't pursued their huge dream yet, they will cite not being able to afford it. But when you look at the items above and how many resources they put toward them, it's easy to see that they could have done some amazing things over these past six years......they just chose to do something else instead.

Just remember, there's always something. Some things are in our control, and some aren't. However, far more is in our control than we'd like to believe. Please don't allow yourself to be a victim of your own life. Seize control of these decisions and prioritize your time, resources, and actions in accordance with your true values. Future you deserves it.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Pursue Failure?!?!

In yesterday’s post, I talked about the concept of “pursuing failure.” I think about this idea so much that I forget how weird and controversial this topic is. First, let me clarify. I don’t advocate pursuing intentional, known failure. That would run afoul of another frequently discussed concept on this blog: the relentless pursuit of excellence.

We should strive to be excellent at everything we do. We should strive to achieve every dream, goal, and objective we aspire to. Here’s where the failure part comes into play. If we’re willing to shoot higher, dream bigger, and get uncomfortable, failure is inevitable. Anyone can avoid failure. The only prerequisite for avoiding failure is to refrain from doing difficult things. Therefore, if we never fail at anything, it’s likely a sign that we’re not pushing ourselves hard or far enough.

I’m leaning into things that are so ridiculous and audacious that failure is almost inevitable. Even if I’m as excellent as I can possibly be, there’s almost no way to fully avoid failure. Sometimes, soul-crushing, publicly embarrassing failure. It’s a tremendously uncomfortable concept to wrestle with, but once we come to terms with that reality, it presents us a critical fork in the road: play it safe or go for it. After years of basking in the play-it-safe camp, I took a hard turn and realized life is better lived in the go-for-it camp. Does it always go well? No, not at all. Sometimes, it feels like a big ball of flames. Other times, however, it’s glorious.

The bigger question we have to ask ourselves is what regrets our future selves will or will not have. When I look back on some of my biggest failures over the past decade, I definitely wish I could get some do-overs or second chances. However, I don’t think I’ll look back with regret. Conversely, I have some deep regrets for the things I was too scared, too safe, too timid to pursue. I’ll never get those opportunities back, but I don’t have to make those same lame decisions in the future.

Therefore, when I talk about pursuing failure, that’s exactly what I’m talking about. Pursue big things with a posture of excellence, and let the cards fall how they may. Sometimes we will achieve glorious wins, and sometimes we’ll suffer humiliating failures. We can’t have one without the other.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Humiliation Ritual

Two nights ago, many of us witnessed a humiliation ritual known as the World Cup. Team USA was publicly and brutally embarrassed by Belgium on the world's grandest stage. For the rest of their lives, those players will forever be associated with the frustrating and unforgettable events that unfolded that night.

They aren't alone, though. For the past few weeks, hundreds of players representing their countries have subjected themselves to a similar humiliation ritual on equally grand stages. The World Cup isn't for the weak of heart. It brings the greatest joys and the darkest lows.

Why would players put themselves in those positions? The "greatest joys" part! The only way to attain the grandest of achievements is by risking failure. As I love to say, failure is the admission price to success. Almost nobody who wins the trophy has done so without first being subjected to soul-crushing humiliation. It comes with the gig.

Despite that, most of us non-footballers will spend our entire lives trying to avoid failure at all costs. Why? Because failure sucks. It's easier to live a life without risking failure than to put ourselves out there and ultimately be subjected to that twisted ritual.

If failure and embarrassment are terrible things and we ought to avoid them at all costs, why do soccer players spend their entire lives trying to make a team that will likely cause much pain and suffering? Because the pursuit of meaning MUST involve the risk of failure. It's a prerequisite.

Last time I checked, none of us will get out alive. Therefore, let's live. Be uncomfortable. Pursue failure. Stretch in ways that will most certainly result in some form of pain or embarrassment. It never feels good in the moment, but one day, we'll be talking about how it was all worth it.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Don’t Let the Sequence Fool You

A young man asked me to look over his finances and help him get some control. Included in this conversation was a review of his most recent bank statement.

"Dude, you spent $700 more than you made last month!" I exclaimed.

"I had to buy groceries at the end of the month. What, you expect me just not to eat?"

"No, I expect you not to implode your finances by plunging yourself into debt."

"I had no choice, Travis! Either I buy groceries, or I don't eat."

"The sequence of your purchases isn't what matters here. That $700 of overspend doesn't just get credited to the last $700 you spent in the month."

"Again, I HAD to buy groceries."

"Did you need the other $1,200 of impulse purchases you made before that?"

“……….”

This young guy fell into the same trap so many do. Instead of viewing his money as a giant puzzle, he viewed it as a sequence of transactions. Then, when he had known and tangible needs, he acted (even though he had already exceeded his budgeted income for the month). This is how we end up in debt. This is how we never have funds for wants. This is how we can't afford to invest. This is how we justify not giving. We spend, spend, spend, then when a NEED arises, we flippantly meet that need without regard for the consequences.

It's a psychological phenomenon that often strikes us humans. If you're human, you're subject to it. What's the solution? Have a plan for the month. The WHOLE month. We know we need groceries. We know the rent or mortgage has to get paid. We know we'll need to put fuel in the vehicles. These are known expenses. Therefore, plan accordingly. While we're planning, we should also plan for the fun stuff. Plan for the dining out. Plan for the date nights. Plan for the concerts. Plan for the plane tickets. Plan for the new clothing. The keyword is "plan."

Let's remove the bias toward sequence and replace it with a bias toward intentionality. Oh, you really, really want a new Blackstone grill? Great! Is it in your plan? If not, then don't do it. Put it in your plan next month. Then buy it! The goal here isn't to demonize spending, but to demonize unplanned, impulsive, destructive spending. Let your plan be your plan, then execute. If it includes a fun trip or a Blackstone grill, go for it! But we can't constantly buy things that aren't in the plan, blow past our budget on buying true needs, then blame the needs.

We can do better! We deserve better. We'll thank ourselves for giving ourselves better!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

The Fork After the Fork After the Fork

While having coffee with a buddy last week, he brought up an interesting idea. He was talking about one of his college student sons. This particular son is still trying to determine where/how he will start his career. My friend mentioned that he's at a fork in the road. Several options are on the table. None of those will likely be THE option, but once he decides on this fork, another fork will open.

I thought that was such a beautiful metaphor for life. If we think about it, every aspect of life offers us forks in the road. Then, after we make a decision, we're presented with another series of forks to choose from. Where we are now at x area of life (whether it be career, school, relationships, parenting, etc.) is the product of each fork we chose. Some forks produce positive results, some neutral results, and some disastrous results.

Whether it's my financial situation or current career setup, I can trace my path backward through each decision at each fork. For the most part, I'm pleased with the decisions I made. However, there are most certainly forks I chose that were harmful to my life. Purchases I made. Debts I accepted. Investments I made out of pride. Clients I said "no" to. Clients I said "yes" to.

When I look back at my forks and watch others work through their forks, I don't think the goal is to completely avoid missteps. Rather, when we misstep, we have the level-headedness and wherewithal to make a wise choice at the next fork. It's so easy to compound mistakes. The compounding can happen for a number of reasons, whether it's that we're in a heightened state of stress, chasing to get on the other side of the ledger, or denying we made a poor choice to begin with. Needless to say, it's imperative that we approach each fork for whatever it offers. Reality on reality's terms.

In a way, I think viewing life through the lens of forks makes it easier, more approachable. Instead of having a million options before us, we can narrow it down to a handful of key options. Then, after confidently making a decision, we can move on to the next. Approaching our decisions this way allows us to act with intentionality and under control.

I'm currently at a fork in the road on many fronts, and perhaps you are, too. If so, I hope you embrace each opportunity for whatever it is. Then, once you do, you approach the next fork in the same way. Let's get back to basics and simplify the tasks before us.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

A Different Kind of Independence Day

I received a fun message yesterday. One of our blog readers wanted to wish me a happy Independence Day, but "a different kind of Independence Day."

Beginning next week, her husband starts a new job. Beginning next week, they are proclaiming independence from "work that sucks their soul." Not independence from work, but independence from work that lacks meaning.

She shared in her message that there will be consequences. Most notably, this job switch will delay their retirement by 5-7 years. However, as she noted, this brings to mind two different thoughts:

1. It's worth giving up 5-7 years of retirement if those 5-7 years can actually bring meaning, joy, and fulfillment.

2. If this work is as meaningful as they believe it will be, it will be a better life than any life of leisure can bring.

Amazing! Sometimes, when I look in the mirror and ask myself why I spend hundreds of hours per year writing this blog and recording the podcast, stories like this remind me exactly why we do what we do. Our sole objective is to bend the needle for how our culture views work and money. When we hear these types of stories, it gives us a glimpse into the progress being made. Today, I celebrate them. Their lives will never be the same, and for that, I'm grateful.

"A different kind of Independence Day." It has a nice ring to it.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Not Perfect, But….

One of my favorite parts of this World Cup season is seeing all the international fans experiencing America for the first time. The TikTok videos are amazing, and I thoroughly enjoy each one. There is discourse about the food, the people, the cultures, the geography, the freedoms, the scale, and the quirks. One overarching message is clear: America isn't like what they've been told all these years. People are viewing America through the lens of curiosity, wonder, and openness.....and they love it!

America isn't perfect, but it's pretty great. We have our failures, shortcomings, and baggage. You know who else does, too? Everyone! Every country carries failures, shortcomings, and baggage. I've been to nearly 40 countries over the past 20 years. Every country has amazing qualities. Every time I experience a new place, I revel in the little nuances that make it different, special. Whether it's the food, culture, people, or sights, I try to capture in my soul what makes it special.

There's a mourning that happens every time I leave a country. I know I'll miss it. I know I'll leave a piece of me there. I know that for decades, I'll have flashbacks to memories, moments, tastes, people, and sights. At the same time, though, it's always so good to return to U.S. soil. Each time I experience this cycle, I'm reminded that while America isn't perfect, it's pretty great.

I wish we could see America as these international fans have over the past few weeks. I wish we could take a step back and see our home with the same childlike wonder and awe. It's a pretty amazing place that we too often take for granted. Here's my encouragement to you. Leave America. Go see another culture. Embrace it, savor it, enjoy it. Soak up the food, the culture, and the awesomeness. Then, through that process, be reminded of what makes America great as well.

Happy 250th birthday, America!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Choose Your Waste

I recently had an interesting conversation with an early 30-something. Through the course of the discussion, he confessed that he hates his job. This isn't surprising considering 70% of Americans dislike or hate their jobs. Here's the surprising part, though. He said he knew he was going to hate it BEFORE he started his career 10 years ago! That's right. Coming out of college, he knew he was going to hate what was about to unfold.

"Why didn't you do something different?" I asked.

"I paid tens of thousands for my degree. I didn't want to waste it."

Many of you can relate to this sentiment. It's something I hear all the time in my work. Who we are at 28, 38, and 48 is usually different from who we were when we were 18-year-old kids. Life changes.....we change. Therefore, this feeling of not wanting to "waste" our degree hits close to home for many.

Here's what I told him. First, nothing is wasted. While a degree might list a major, it's more than a piece of paper with an industry title. It's the culmination of years of classes, relationships, experiences, failures, and growth. Much of what happened during that season of life will absolutely be repurposed in subsequent seasons of life, even if in different fields.

Second, let's pretend what I said above is dead wrong and a career change would result in my friend "wasting" his degree. Would he rather waste his degree or waste his life? Waste four years of his life that happened a decade ago, or waste the next four decades of his life?

It's an idea worth pondering today. Millions of people are sitting on degrees, tenure, and industry experience they are afraid to "waste." However, we need to choose our waste carefully. Life is far too precious to allow a decision from years past to sabotage our future.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Two People to Make Proud

I recently stumbled upon a quote that lives rent-free in my head: "There are only two people you should strive to make proud: 10-year-old you and 80-year-old you." Let that sink in. See, it messes with your head!

When I read the quote, I didn't see any other context. It was thrown at me completely unfiltered and without additional structure. Here's how I interpret it:

• To make 10-year-old you proud, go for it. Don't lose that childlike wonder, curiosity, and dreams. When we're finally of age to actually do something about it, do something about it!

• To make 80-year-old you proud, don't leave regrets on the table. None of us will sit there at 80 years old thinking about how we should have played it safer, taken fewer risks, or pursued more comfort. Don't let yourself sit in regret when you're old, wrinkly, and grey.

Is this true? I wonder. I've been thinking about this a lot. After all, this totally seems like something I would think. Do I agree? After much contemplation, I couldn't agree more.

Here's where the rubber meets the road. Assess your life. Take stock of your journey. What would 10-year-old and 80-year-old you think of the journey you've lived so far? Would they be proud? Would they be disappointed? Don't answer me, answer the person in the mirror.

I still need to think about my answer, but today, I encourage you to think about yours. Have a great day; for current you, 10-year-old you, and 80-year-old you.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Leaning Into Your Failures

I had lunch with a hungry young college guy yesterday. He's a finance major, exploring what he wants to do with this degree. I met with him at the recommendation of his high school business teacher, who is a buddy of mine. It was fun spending time with him, and I wish him a ton of success and meaning in the season ahead.

He asked me one specific question that I thought was gold. In reference to trying to bolster his resume and find more internship opportunities, what things should he specifically be trying to highlight? That's when he gave me a little gold nugget. He and a buddy used to have a t-shirt company in high school.

By the phrase "used to," I gathered it ultimately failed.....he confirmed that notion. Perfect! Talk about that! Use that! I've interviewed hundreds of college business students over the years, and I frankly couldn't care less about grades, clubs, or awards. I wanted to know about real-life experience. It's fun and easy to talk about things we've succeeded in. However, it's an entirely different story when it comes to the times we've crashed and burned. I want to hear about those!

My advice to this young man was simple. Share what you did. Explain why you believed you failed. Communicate what you learned from it and took away from that experience. That's the gold. That's the real beauty of the journey. We often learn and grow far more from the failures than we do from the wins.

I'd rather hire or work with someone who has failed two dozen times than someone who has never put themselves in a position to fail in the first place. Failure builds character; it derives humility. Allow that character and humility to shine. Own it. Embrace it. USE IT!

Please don't ignore or hide your failures. Understand how they made you better and grew you into the person you are today. Then, use them to be better than ever. Advice for a college kid, advice for you, advice for me.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

“Have I Been Conned?”

"Have I Been Conned?" read the subject line of an e-mail I received last month.

The long e-mail I received was a hard one to digest, as evidenced by the month it's taken me to write about it. It was a deeply personal e-mail, so I'm going to paraphrase.

This man, we'll call him Steve (mid-40s), said he first stumbled onto my content about 4 years ago after randomly catching one of our Meaning Over Money podcast episodes. He was drawn in by the production quality of the show, and stayed because, unlike most podcasts, our show was short and to the point. "No fluff, no filler, just compelling, thought-provoking ideas."

He said that for several years, he disagreed with more than half of my content, especially anything relating to the idea that our work should provide meaning. His mission in life has been to make as much money as possible so he can retire as quickly as possible. And if you've been a follower of my content for any period of time, you know how much disdain I have for that mode of operation.

Here's where Steve's story gets interesting. One day, earlier this year, he woke up with a pit in his stomach. As he prepared for his day, he wondered to himself, "Is this really all life is about? Work, money, sleep, work, money, sleep, work, money, sleep." In an instant, he felt like everything he had been told about life revealed itself as one giant lie. What's the point, he wondered. After spending more than 20 years in his career, it just dawned on him that he was "playing a loser's game."

"I fell for the lie that life is about making money. I lost sight of what was really important to me. As I look around, I realize almost everyone is doing the same thing. I think that's why I so frequently disagreed with your content. Until now!"

Steve isn't alone. In fact, I hear from people just like Steve every week. It feels like an awakening is happening. The wool is being pulled from over people's eyes, and they are recognizing that our culture's perspective of work and money is deeply toxic. It's led to a place where 70% of Americans dislike or hate their jobs. On top of that, mental health issues are rising quicker than ever. We are running on this hamster wheel of money, consumption, and misery, picking up steam every step of the way.

At some point, we must jump off the wheel. We need to catch our breath and realize what game we're actually playing. We live in a system that's built around keeping us obsessed with money, stuff, and status. More than ever, one of the key status symbols that we worship is an earlier-the-better retirement. That's the flex. That's the mission.

My new friend Steve sees the con now. Fortunately, his eyes have been opened. As he puts it, he's never been richer, never been more miserable, and never been this lonely, and never been more ready to stop working.....and he's still only in his 40s. It's time for Steve to start playing a new game.

I'm on Team Steve. I love this new game that Steve is opting into. Meaning over money. Impact instead of consumption. The pursuit of work that matters. It's a wild game; it's an amazing game. Maybe you can play it, too.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

Mazzulla Has a Good Point

I recently stumbled upon an interesting video clip of Joe Mazzulla. Joe Mazzulla is the head coach of the Boston Celtics, known for his sharp comments to the press. Sometimes, his responses seem a bit unreasonable and impatient. However, there are times when he responds in profound and thoughtful ways. Today's video clip is of the latter.

Reporter (asking Joe about how he's dealing with the brutally difficult stretch his team is going through): "Is there something you're doing in the last 48 hours to keep yourself away from just being consumed with this? Are you watching different movies?"

Joe (with a shocked look on his face): "Honestly, I met three girls under the age of 21 with terminal cancer. I thought I was helping them by talking to them, and they were helping me. And so having an understanding about what life is really all about, and watching a girl dying, and smiling, and enjoying her life.....that's what it's really all about. And having that faith. You know, the other thing is you always hear people give glory to God and say thank you when they're holding a trophy. But you never really hear it in times like this. And so for me, it's an opportunity to just sit right where I'm at and just be faithful. That's what it's about."

Perspective matters. We need to remember what's really important as we live our days. It's so easy to get caught up in the small, ultimately meaningless nuances of life. The person in front of us didn't accelerate when the light turned green. Someone at the coffee shop cut in front of us in the line. Our co-worker gave us a snooty attitude when we asked for a favor. One of those dumb speed cameras caught us going 57 in a 45, and now we must send some rando a $97 fine. We didn’t get the promotion we so desperately wanted.

But then, there's Joe's perspective. Man, we're so blessed. Most of us will wake up today more blessed than the vast majority of people who have ever lived on this planet. Yet, many of us will wallow in self-pity and frustration today, looking for reasons to feel negative about the journey. We lose perspective.

I hope you live today knowing just how blessed you are. Not a perfect life. Not a life void of baggage, pain, and suffering. But blessed nonetheless. Remembering that fact has the potential to re-frame our entire day, allowing us to focus less on ourselves and more on others. That's the ticket to meaning and impact.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

And the World Shall Be Better

I received a fun little surprise yesterday when I opened my e-mail account. I was met with a piece of writing by one of my best friends, Dan. In his message, he shared that he's long been contemplating sending a monthly e-mail to a large group of people.....with yesterday's e-mail being the first. He vulnerably shared what prevented him from doing it until now:

"But if I'm honest, fear held me back.

• What if it's not good enough?

• What if nobody reads it?

• What if people think less of me?

The more I thought about it, the more I realized those aren't the right questions. The answers to those questions will always be changing. They're dependent on opinions, circumstances, and things we can't control."

Dan is a tremendously impactful and influential man. His experience, wisdom, and gifts have changed countless lives (mine included!!!). However, now that I think about it, outside of random texts, I've never seen his influence in written form. I liked it!!! Strike that, I loved it!

Dan is one of those people I envision never being scared, never backing down, never faltering. He's stronger than me. He's wiser than me, too. So when I see his vulnerable words about fear, it struck a chord in me. It's a topic I write about often, and Dan is evidence that even the strongest of us are sometimes afflicted by it.

But the fact that Dan is facing this challenge and opportunity of writing head-on tells me that his influence in the world is about to multiply. Thousands of people who haven't had the privilege of being impacted by Dan now have the opportunity to learn, grow, and be encouraged by Dan's gifts and insights.

Dan decided to step through the fear.......and the world shall be better.

Dan is a special dude, for sure! But everyone reading this has something to offer, too. In many cases, our impact and influence are just on the other side of stepping out of our comfort zone. It's on the other side of our fears. It's on the other side of doing the hard thing. Like Dan, many of you probably have things you've been considering for a long time. Today, please allow Dan's action to inspire your action. Step into what you're called to do.....and the world shall be better.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

The Pillow Test

There was a time in my life when I defined my day's success by how much money I made. And by "a time," that means 10+ years. For more than a decade, the measuring stick of success was measured in income, investment balances, titles, and net worth. After all, those are easy-to-read measuring sticks. It's easy to open an online bank portal and see a number in black and white.

Then, something changed within me. I realized none of that mattered. All of the measuring sticks I had been using for the past 10+ years were futile. They were something, but ultimately, nothing. That's when I developed "the pillow test."

Here's how the pillow test works. When I go to bed at night and lay my head on that pillow, I reflect on my day and determine whether I did everything I could to make an impact on the world and on others. If my answer is yes, I succeeded. If my answer is no, then I might not have. It's clearly not as objective as a black-and-white number on the screen, but it sure does make for a better assessment of my day.

I've had a few days recently where I made very little money, but through the lens of the pillow test, they were massive successes. Those days were filled with needle-moving encounters, and I'm prayerful that I served people in the ways they needed to be served. What's in it for me? Well, nothing, I suppose, but that wasn't the point. The point was to lie my head on the pillow at night and, hopefully, believe I had done everything I could to make an impact.

It's a different way to look at life, but I'll testify a better way. Does the pillow test pay the bills? No, not always. Sure, we need to pay the bills. We need to financially care for our families. That's true. Two thoughts on that:

1. When we serve others well, money usually follows. That doesn't necessarily mean a ton of money, but serving people well is the prerequisite to creating an income. They often go hand in hand.

2. When the dust settles, and we take our last breath, we most certainly won't be adding numbers in our head, trying to determine how much money we made. On the flip side, I think there's a strong chance we WILL be thinking about the possible impact we made on this world during the years we were blessed to be here. That distinction is worth considering.

I hope you think about this when you go to bed tonight. Regardless of how much or how little money you made today, did you make an impact? Did you serve others well? Did you move the needle in someone's world? If so, I don't care how much money you made; you won!

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.

D, R, or Not Important

I recently received an interesting first-time e-mail from a blog reader: "I've been reading your blog religiously for more than 2 years now and I still can't tell your politics. I feel like I know your values but you never tip your hand about politics. Is that intentional?"

I think this is a very insightful observation, and yes, it's intentional. We live in a culture that defines people by the letters "D" and "R." Many people define themselves with these designations. It almost becomes people's entire identity and personality. It's interesting to me that for many Americans, the letter they attach to themselves has more bearing on their life than their chosen faith.

Therefore, I'm quite pleased that this blog reader has been reading my content for years, but still cannot paint me into a political box. Here's my favorite part of her e-mail, though. She feels like she knows my values. Yes!!! My values. Values matter so much more than letters, candidates, and bumper stickers. Every day, I seek to communicate my values, ideas, and perspectives. That's one of the reasons why so many people come back again and again. I DON'T jam politics down people's throats. Now, some people might ascertain my leanings based on certain shared perspectives, but it's not a concrete correlation.

Why? Why don't I share my political leanings more openly? In our culture, we decide whether we fully agree or fully disagree with what someone says the moment we know the letter in front of their name. Even if it's the best idea ever, we despise it if the person has the wrong letter. And even if it's the worst idea ever, we love it if the person has the right letter. Therefore, I opt out of that stupid game and instead allow people to judge my values, ideas, and perspectives on their own merits.

I propose we chop up the letters. Nobody needs to know what letter sits before each of our names. D or R? More like not important. I don't care what letter you wear. I care about the ideas you bring to the table. If you bring good ideas, I'm in. If you bring dumb ideas, well, probably not. Politics shouldn't need to play a factor.

I'm so glad my new blog reader friend shared her observation with me. I'm grateful she noticed, and I hope others do, too. You are more than your politics, far more! In fact, I'd argue that almost everything about you is more important than your politics. Please remember that, and let's create a world where people know more about our values, ideas, and perspectives than the letter we wear.

____

Did someone forward you this post? We're glad you're here! If you'd like to subscribe to The Daily Meaning to receive these posts directly in your inbox (for free!), just CLICK THIS LINK. It only takes 10 seconds.