Parable of the Oat Milk

We have an oat milk problem at Northern Vessel. For the past four years, we've continually experienced these sharp little moments when we've simply run out of it (or nearly ran out). Considering this ingredient is the base of our most famous and best-selling drink (oat milk cold brew latte), running out of oat milk is a disastrous scenario. As recently as a month ago, TJ and I spent one Saturday afternoon driving to every single Target in the metro, hoping to scoop up as many oat milk cartons as possible. With a lot of time and a little luck, we barely scraped together enough to finish our batch of cold brew lattes.

As I continue to grow into my new role inventory management and vendor relationships, I realize that what we've done in the past is some version of white-knuckling. We see we're running low on product, factor in all the supply-and-demand variables we can think of, mathematically calculate how much end product we'll need, mathematically calculate how much oat milk that necessitates, place an order, and hope the delivery timing is in our favor. There are about 10 factors that go into these calculations, each allowing for the possibility of error, and many of which are contextual guesses. That doesn't even include the delivery timing implications.

In comes me. I have a different idea. A simpler idea. After all, simpler is better......always! Here's the new math:

1. How many cases of oat milk can we store at any given time? 56 (about 168 gallons worth). This is approximately three days' worth of need for us.

2. How many cases of oat milk do we have left today? At the end of each business day, someone counts how manycases we have remaining and reports it to our inventory management Slack channel. Let's say the answer is 20. We have 20 cases left.

3. How many cases are needed to restock us fully? 56 cases - 20 cases = 36 cases. 36 cases would fully stock us again.

4. By 9PM, we place our order for next-day delivery of 36 cases of oat milk. If we are perfect in our execution and our supplier is also perfect, there's 0% chance we ever run out again. If we forget to order or our supplier has an issue, this process still makes it very likely we never run out. No messy math, no brain damage, no forgotten factors.

Simple always wins! It's funny, as I received some pushback on these types of processes internally. Some say it's too simple, lacking the context of all the craziness happening around us. My response to these types of critiques: "Even more reason to keep it simple! We can't afford to let all the changing variables jeopardize our supply chain!"

This really isn't about oat milk. This is a parable for everything in our lives. Our gut instinct is to always make things more complicated, more complex, and more sophisticated. This is ironic, as simpler almost always beats complex. Simple allows us to keep our heads on straight, removes brain damage from all the mental math, and allows for repetition. It's one thing to get something right once, and an entirely other thing to need to repeat it over and over. Find a way to make your life simpler. Then, after executing, find another! Such a great way to approach this crazy life of ours.

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Define “Actually Enjoy Life”

I received split feedback about the recent post titled A Middle Finger to Our Future Selves. Specifically, it was about the following excerpt:

"...the idea that we don't know whether we'll even be alive when we're older, so we might as well "enjoy life" while we're young. And by "enjoy life," he meant spend, spend, spend. He hated the idea of saving, or heaven forbid, investing. If he had it, he was going to blow it on something fun."

One blog reader replied to this post and said the following: "Your friend is right you know. We should actually enjoy life while we're young and healthy."

I think this comment gets to the heart of a really important decision. How do we define "actually enjoy life"? The friend in my previous post, this blog reader, and countless others tend to define "actually enjoy life" as some combination of spending money on wants and not working. Those seem to be our two cultural measuring sticks of "actually enjoying life."

What if enjoying life is so much more than how much we can spend and how little we can work? I tend to look at life through the lens of meaning. Am I living my most meaningful life? If the answer is yes, then there's a strong probability that I'm "actually enjoying life." If the answer is no, then I may have some issues. But how much money I can spend on wants is not a real driver in that discussion.

This is why contentment is so important. If we define our enjoyment by how much money we can spend on wants, then our ability to enjoy life is essentially capped by our income and resources. If we have many resources, we can be happy. If we don't, we can't. That's a really depressing proposition. Fortunately, it's a lie.

Contentment, on the other hand, disconnects the two altogether. The people I know who are the most content live tremendously enjoyable lives despite having limited resources. They don't allow stuff and leisure to define happiness. This disconnect in definitions is also one of the reasons there are so many people unhappy, fantasizing about retirement, while others are still working in their 70s, happy as a clam. This group of positive and optimistic people aren't defining themselves by how much they can spend or how little they can work. They are merely soaking up every bit of meaning they can find in this life.

Yes, we should "actually enjoy life." Amen to that! However, I don't think it's as simple as deciding to spend as much money on wants as possible. Instead, I believe it comes from pursuing meaning each and every day. Meaning in our home life. Meaning in our work life. Meaning in our generosity. Meaning.....period. The rest will sort itself out.

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It’s Kinda Like a Blog

Over the past few months, Sarah and I have found random pieces of paper and notebooks scattered around the house containing notes from the kids. The notes are generally around 2-3 sentences each, detailing some part of their day. Many of them are dated.

When we asked the boys about them, they answered very matter-of-factly: "Those are our journals. It's kinda like a blog." Hmmm, where would they get the idea of writing blogs?!?! I'd by lying if I said I wasn't completely touched by this little detail. It's fun to know they see what I do, and in some ways, want to emulate it. Moral of the story: kids are always watching.

It gets more interesting. Without divulging full "blog posts," I'll share a few excerpts I've seen:

• "We played football after Dad got home."

• "Dad took us camping."

• "Dad came to our game."

In a journal entry that may only be 2-3 sentences, it's wild that my mere presence in their lives makes the short list of notable events in their day. Again, I was touched, and again, kids are always watching!

I'm on record of saying I don't care what my kids decide to do in life. I will support, celebrate, and encourage any path they feel called to pursue. However, in the meantime, it feels great knowing that they are watching, taking mental notes, and using what they see as launching points to try new things. I'm so proud of them for that, and it makes me even more convinced that setting these positive examples needs to be one of the most important things in my life right now.

Kids are always watching. Words to live by....in so many different ways. If that's true, and the kids are sincerely watching, please go live a life today that you're proud for them to witness. I will endeavor to do the same.

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Remembered For

One of my friends is nearing the end of his life. We've had some interesting conversations recently. As you can imagine, he's been quite introspective lately. He recently asked me a question that I've been thinking about: "What will I be remembered for?"

It's a fascinating question. In many ways, it's the culmination, aggregation, and consolidation of 70+ years of life. What will I be remembered for?

I'm a big believer in reverse engineering. We take the desired outcome and work backward to determine the steps needed today, tomorrow, and the next day to get there. For my friend, much of his cake is baked. The work is done, and now he's trying to discern how the cards are stacked. For many of us (hopefully), there's so much work yet to be done.

What do I want to be remembered for? I'm not going to answer that yet, as I want to give you time to ponder your own answer. But perhaps today is a great day to reflect on the implications of this question.

Here's an alternative way to look at this question. If you were to die today, how would you be remembered? Do you like your answer? If so, you might be on the right track. If not, it might be time for some major soul-searching. Again, I'll save my answer for later.

Here's one thing I know. I DO want to be remembered, and I DO want those memories to be of the positive and impactful variety. Today, I hope my decisions, words, and actions make that more likely, not less. I hope you do the same.

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A Middle Finger To Our Future Selves

I remember speaking to a colleague nearly 20 years ago. He was probably in his early 30s at the time, several years ahead of me in his career. While I wasn't necessarily the wisest steward with my financial resources back then, he and I shared many conversations that stopped me in my tracks. These conversations usually centered on the idea that we don't know whether we'll even be alive when we're older, so we might as well "enjoy life" while we're young. And by "enjoy life," he meant spend, spend, spend. He hated the idea of saving, or heaven forbid, investing. If he had it, he was going to blow it on something fun.

Fast forward 20 years, and I recently ran into him. He's now in his 50s, visibly older than when we last connected (as a few decades of life will do). This time, though, his attitude was different. He was asking me about retirement, investing ideas, and the worry about likely not having enough.

To his detriment, he lived out the principles he preached way back then. He spent, spent, and spent, giving little regard for his future self. In fact, I'd argue he gave his future self a hefty middle finger. It turns out, though, that one day, our present self becomes that future self. Today, he's the future self that younger him so blatantly disrespected.

He's scared....as he should be. His options are limited.....as expected. He feels trapped.....which is understandable. Now, his 50-something self is wondering how to navigate not only the present, but the future. He lived a lot of life in his younger days, but his current and future quality of life are very much in question.

This is a tough situation. I have so much empathy for people who face these realities. Unfortunately, I don't have a magic wand to wave for them. I can't undo their past mistakes. There's no magic pill or secret strategy to bridge decades of gaps.

No matter how old you are today, future you is depending on current you to make wise choices. Sacrificial choices. Loving choices. Be a good steward, not only with your finances, but with your body, relationships, children, marriage, and mental health. Future us is pleading for us to be better and do better. Their livelihood depends on it, and soon enough, that will be our present self. Be good to him/her.

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The “Dumbest” Person In the Room

There are a few people in my life who share a few similar traits:

1. They continually surround themselves with people they believe are smarter than they are.

2. They position themselves as the dumbest person in the room.

3. They ask countless questions, ridiculous or otherwise.

These are interesting people to me. There's a quiet confidence that comes from someone who intentionally surrounds themselves with rock stars. There's also a humility that comes from not having to say the smartest thing or act impressively. They are comfortable in their own skin, willing to ask any and all questions without fear of embarrassment.

All of these people share a fourth common trait. Want to know what it is? They are actually the smartest people in the room. Perhaps not by education, or pedigree, or title. Rather, they are the smartest people in the room by the sheer fact that they are willing to ask ALL the questions, surround themselves with rock stars, and absorb all context that comes their way. Through experience, curiosity, and a willingness to be humble, they've quietly ratcheted up the wisdom totem pole and now sit above most people. They are the "dumbest" people in the room, yet at the same time, are easily the smartest people in the room.

I love these types of people so much, and hope to one day be more like them. I have a lot of work to do, but over time, I'd like to work my way there. I'm probably better at this than I used to be, but when I see how some of these people approach life and people, I am humbly reminded of how much work I have to do.

Whatever you're doing today, I hope you're the "dumbest" person in the room. Soak it up. Enjoy the process. Absorb it like a sponge. That's how we get better, and in turn, make a larger impact.

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What Is a Memory Worth?

For the past 25 years, I promised myself that if I ever had a chance to attend a World Cup game, I would. Well, we are nearing the fulfillment of my wish and a referendum on my promise to myself. The World Cup is hitting the U.S. this summer, and one of the host cities is three hours from my house (and 30 minutes from my sister-in-law's). Will I do it? Will I follow through on the dream of younger me? We shall see.

Looking at the calendar, I have the opportunity to watch two teams I have no affinity for or allegiance toward. But it's the freaking World Cup!!!! The get-in price is currently $313 per person. That's the worst seat in the stadium.....for $313.

But what is a memory worth? No matter what happens or how the game goes, going to that game will be a lifelong memory. No question about that. Therefore, if this is something I'll remember for my entire life, is it worth at least $313? I think that's a resounding yes.

Will I actually do it? Only time will tell. Perhaps that's one of the reasons I'm writing this post: So hundreds of people will hold me accountable to my own principles!

I think it's an interesting idea, though. It's so easy to get hung up on prices for things that, on the surface, should cost far less than they do. We look at these prospective transactions and try to view them objectively. We put our logical caps on and attempt to do a little cost-benefit analysis in our heads. Ultimately, though, we sometimes have to throw out the normal playbook and understand we're talking about a lifelong memory. That, in my opinion, can trump the normal decision-making process.

What about you? What's something that might not make much sense on paper, but in the long run, you believe is a steal of a deal, no-brainer?

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The Power of Good Work

I don't know if this resonates with you, but there's something profoundly refreshing about a week of good, productive, and mentally grueling work. I'll be at the cattle ranch this week, and I'm ready for an onslaught of 12-hour days filled with challenges, wins, brain stumpers, and needle-moving accomplishments. That excites me so much!

Will this week be fun? Uhhhh, probably not. I'm sure there will be some fun moments, but this really isn't about fun. It's about making a difference, finding meaning, and adding value to others. That's what we so often get wrong about this idea of work that matters. "Work that matters" doesn't mean "fun" work, or "enjoyable" work, or "relaxing" work. It means that by doing the work, it fills something inside us that would otherwise remain empty.

Every time I talk about the importance of work in our lives, there's one particular argument that gets thrown at me. Someone tells me the story of their Uncle Joey, who, after working until the "old" age of 65, died a year after he retired. This story becomes Exhibit A for why Uncle Joey should have retired years earlier so that he could have actually "enjoyed life."

Someday, I'd like to conduct a study to possibly prove this argument, but I think the story of the Uncle Joeys of the world is backward. Passing away shortly after retirement isn't the consequence of tragic luck, but rather, the consequence of lost purpose. Work (the act of adding value to others) is vitally important to our journey. It's far more than a necessary evil. It's far more than a simple exchange of effort for money. Work checks a box deep within us that we don't always even know is there.

No, this won't be an easy week. No, it probably won't be a fun week. But man, I'm excited to be productive, serve my client well, and add value to a wonderful team that values my service. I'll never take that for granted. I hope you feel the same about what you're about to do.

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Two Families, Two Perspectives

I had a few interesting conversations last week that showcase an important concept. It's about two different families. Both families live in the same town. Both families have two kids under the age of 12.

Family 1:

• The husband has a monthly take-home income of approximately $10,000.

• The wife has a monthly take-home income of approximately $5,000

• The total monthly take-home income is about $15,000

This family endures constant financial stress. There's rarely anything left over. The credit cards often come out to play. Most purchases are made with debt. There's very little savings, and giving seems like a pipe dream. Marital tensions are running high. Their overall sentiment is that if they just made a little more money, all of this financial stress would go away.

Family 2:

• The husband has a monthly take-home income of approximately $5,000.

• The wife stays at home with their two small children.

• The total monthly take-home income is about $5,000.

This family's entire monthly income stream approximates the lower-income earner in Family 1. Their total take-home income is 1/3 of the other family's! Yet, they don't feel financial stress. No, there isn't a ton of extra each month, and they need to be diligent with the dollars they do have, but life is good! They consider themselves blessed, save for the future, and ensure giving is part of their monthly rhythm.

Would more money help? Yeah, it probably would. However, more isn't the answer. More isn't what defines our success. More isn't some magic pill that solves all of life's problems. This is a phenomenon I see over and over. Yes, more income can help, but 90% of our problems are the person staring back at us in the mirror, not the dollar amount on our paycheck. The sooner we realize this, the sooner we can take steps actually to improve our quality of life.

Final thought. Just imagine if we could do both. First, we get right with our relationship with money. We have a healthy mindset. We establish solid practices. We make the best use of every dollar we're blessed with.

Then, second, we find ways to increase our income along the way. We put in the work. We practice excellence. We pay our dues. We meet people's needs. We add value to the organization. When we do these things, additional income is a natural byproduct.

Combining these two ideas can literally revolutionize our lives. When we get right with money and put in the work, it's amazing what can happen!

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One Thing We Owe Them

During a recent group conversation, someone said something that surprised me. "My company doesn't pay me enough for me to give my best effort."

I tried not to let my eyeballs pop out of my skull, and assumed others were doing the same. Turns out, I was wrong. Instead, everyone else in the group affirmed this person's perspective. The general consensus was that if a company expects us to work hard, they should pay us more. What does "more" mean? Not sure, but it's more than whatever we're being paid today!

The last time I checked, employment is a two-way agreement. We agree to do our job, and in exchange, the company agrees to compensate us to whatever level agreed upon. Both parties have the freedom to exit the relationship, but there's an inherent understanding.

We don't owe our employers loyalty. We don't owe them our dignity. We don't owe them a boundaryless relationship. We don't owe them the right to abuse us. We don't owe them perpetual employment. But we DO owe them our best work. No matter what we're being paid, we owe the person or entity that pays us our best work in exchange for whatever compensation we've agreed on.

We might not like the compensation structure. That's fair....and valid. We have every right to pursue other opportunities. To go find an employer who will pay us more, treat us better, and/or offer a healthier culture. All of that is great, and I 100% encourage it. However, in the meantime, we still owe them that one thing: Our best work while we're being compensated.

I don't feel like this is a spicy take, but I could be surprised. Let me know. What do you think? Please hit "reply" to this e-mail or drop a comment on the webpage below. We don't owe them much, but I do believe we owe them that one thing. Let's be excellent! Let's honor these relationships.

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Taking It For Granted

A few days ago, I had a question about a project I was working on. It was a question better suited for a conversation than an e-mail or text. As such, I requested a quick meeting. Four hours later, the four of us jumped on a video call to hash through the issue. In 2026, we take for granted just how crazy this is. 25 years ago me would have thought it to be the most insane concept in the world.

One other wrinkle. All four of us were from four different countries in four different time zones. For some of us, it was night, and for others, morning. Again, we live in wild times! With a few clicks on a touch screen, people from all around the world are instantly connected....for free! Again, amazing!!

Yet, we take it for granted. In 2026, this is just called life. Even though I often take it for granted, too, I try to stop and recognize just how special these times are. Sure, modern times present many new, intense, and profound challenges. I never want to gloss over that. At the same time, though, never before have the opportunities been this rich, deep, and wide. We're literally a few clicks from every single person on the planet.

Think about a living person you'd most like to meet one day. Could be a celebrity, or an author, or an entertainer, or a politician, or an entrepreneur. Anyone. Think of that person. Now, think about the reality we're living in, where if you had the courage and gumption, you could essentially reach out to this person today. Send a DM, leave a comment on their post, write them a note, share a story with them, ask for a meeting. Everything is on the table.

I once had a youth group kid who obsessed over a particular music artist. One of the biggest names in the world. His songs were constantly on the radio. Millions of followers. This kid often talked about how he dreamed that one day he could meet this artist. "Why don't you just message him?" I asked. This young man looked at me like I had arms growing out of my ears. That idea was absurd! But I keep pushing him. "Do it!" "Just send the message!" "Quit being scared." "What's the worst that could happen!?!"

Tired of my prodding, he actually did it! About three days later, this massive celebrity responded to him with a thoughtful and contextual message, thanking this young man for listening and reaching out. They've periodically messaged back and forth over the years.

Everything is on the table. Nothing is impossible. That means something different for each of us, but please don't take our opportunities or technologies for granted. Everything is on the table, so we ought to act like it.

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Nothing Left Over

I had a wonderful chat with a young couple yesterday. They are an awesome young couple, but I'm biased. One of the spouses is a former youth group kid; I've known her since she was 15. Therefore, it's safe to say I'm tremendously honored to spend time with her now that she and her husband are living their full-on adult lives.

It was a similar conversation I've had with hundreds of couples. And just like every other time I have this chat, there's one part that stands out like a sore thumb: When I discuss the concept of having no income left over at the end of the month. If a couple starts the month with $4,000 of cash sitting in their checking account and has $7,000 of income coming in, they should end the month with $4,000 of cash sitting in their checking account. None of their income should be left over. All of it should be gone.

Here's why. We humans don't do well with "extra." Extra either gets squandered or hoarded, rarely an in-between. If there's extra, we'll impulsively spend it somewhere we didn't intend, or we'll squirrel it away for no specific purpose (which subconsciously incentivizes us to repeat and grow that behavior next time).

Here's how this could/should manifest itself in our monthly finances. Every dollar should have a home. We spend it, give it, or save it. If we get to the end of our budget and there's $500 left, we must go back up and find a place to spend it, give it, or save it. No dollar left behind!

I don't even care what people do with this extra money, so long as they are intentional about its destination. This one principle can revolutionize the way we perceive and handle money. Every bit of our income now has a purpose. Intentionality runs through our entire budget. The most important categories get love, not the most impulsive ones. This allows our personal values to shine through and become truly prioritized in our monthly finances. Things that should get funded actually get funded. Things that shouldn't, don't. It's simple. It's pure.

I started following this principle more than 20 years ago, and after teaching it to hundreds of families, I can positively testify that it's a real game-changer. Something to consider adding to your arsenal. Have an awesome day!

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Once You See It

I recently found out that one of my friends is taking her family abroad this summer. Not some fancy adventure to Europe, but a deeply cultural experience in a place most Americans will ever see. "This will change your kids' lives forever!" I exclaimed. She wholeheartedly agreed.

Something powerful happens when we see parts of the world that are extremely foreign to us. When we leave our little bubble and get a glimpse of the bigger picture, it has the potential to melt our minds. Everything we know and believe can be turned upside down in a matter of days.

I didn't have one of these experiences until my 30s, but when I did, it permanently shifted my life forever. It's one of the reasons my family lives in a one-bathroom house and drives aging vehicles. No matter how we live here in our bubble, we're rich. Period. There's no way around it. Once you see it, you can't unsee it.

People are hurting. People are sick. People are hungry. People are cold. People are hot. People are unsafe. Yet, here we are, whining that our house isn't big enough, our cars not new enough, our clothes not sylish enough, and our technology not fast enough.

Here's a thought that often crosses my mind. If I had the choice between improving my family's standard of living and helping hundreds (possibly thousands) of people attain a livable standard of living, which would I choose? It turns out, we have that choice every day of our lives. It's easy to think we don't actually make that choice, but not making a choice is still making a choice.

This isn't meant to elicit guilt. Guilt is a terrible master. Rather, this is my encouragement for each family to seek out new perspectives. Let's step out of our bubbles and truly see what's going on around us. Let's get uncomfortable. Let's challenge ourselves to open our eyes. Let's get an up-close view of how the rest of the world lives. Then, and only then, can we be in a position to make some of these difficult choices (without guilt!).

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Lessons From the Dodgeball Court

Do you remember playing dodgeball when you were a kid? I loved P.E. class dodgeball oh so much! I have vivid memories of epic competitions in my old, tiny elementary school gymnasium. The games were ruthless! I recently attended a father-kid event in which old-school dodgeball was heavily featured. Hours of ruthless, chaotic dodgeball!!! It was like jumping into a DeLorean and going back to my elementary school days.

I remember thinking this 35 years ago, but the idea sat clearer on my mind as adult me dove back into the art, science, and madness of dodgeball. You can tell a lot about a person by how they play dodgeball.

With dozens of people on the court, along with another dozen-plus balls whizzing around the room, dodgeball relies on the integrity of its participants to run smoothly. It's a game of inches, angles, and reflexes. Did that ball graze my shirt? Did it make contact with the ball in my hand, or my arm? Did it hit the ground before striking my foot? Did I make a clean catch, or did I trap it before it hit the ground?

During my recent game, I watched kid after kid after kid cheat their little brains out. They would take a 70mph fastball to the chest, then brush it off as if it missed them completely. Other people would get frustrated, tensions would rise, and then they would cheat again. As I watched this unfold, it spoke volumes to me about that person's character.

They were just kids, though! Cut them some slack! Just kids being kids. The little voice on my other shoulder encouraged me to give them grace. After all, my kids aren't perfect, either. I kept watching......

Since it was a father-kid event, dads and their kids often occupied the same space. The kid would float just behind his dad. Dad would feed balls to his son. That's when I noticed something else. The kids who were rampantly cheating had one thing in common. Their dads also had a proclivity to cheat. That's right! Grown men acting with the same lack of integrity. "That ball didn't hit me!" exclaimed one dad who got smoked in the hip.

You can tell a lot about someone by watching them play dodgeball. Character matters so much, even when there aren't refs present to blow their whistles. How we play this game of life matters. Conducting ourselves with high character and integrity is essential for a smooth society, healthy relationships, and living with meaning. And as the cherry on top, the next generation is watching. Every time we act, whether in public or in private, those around us see how we conduct ourselves.

I've always thought about these ideas, but as a father, I can't stop thinking about them. Most of society tells our children the best way to win is to bend the rules, find loopholes, or flat-out cheat. Every ounce of me wants to combat that in my own kids, and that starts with the guy I see in the mirror. We gotta do better; be better; model better. They're all watching.

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Systems and Standards

One of my friends, a fellow business owner, recently asked me what our goals are at Northern Vessel. We've never actually set any goals. In fact, we never discuss goals. There's no set of expectations for what we'd like to accomplish. Instead, it's more aspirational, directional. Continue to push the boundaries of excellence and find ways to exhibit hospitality in new and unexpected ways. To what end? No end. We're seeking the journey, not the destination.

This entire conversation reminds me of a quote I heard about a decade ago. "We don't rise to our goals. We fall to our systems and standards."

The NFL is a great example. All 32 teams start the season with the same goal: to win the Super Bowl. However, only one team will accomplish that goal. It's not that one team has a better, more cemented goal. Rather, a handful of teams simply have better systems and standards. Eventually, through the ebbs and flows of the season, each team falls to its systems and standards, and the team with the best systems and standards (plus a little luck) prevails.

Systems and standards. That's something we obsess about at Northern Vessel. It's an ongoing discussion with our team. It's a never-ending pursuit that impacts every guest interaction and every drink we prepare.

Saturday was the second week of the Des Moines Farmers' Market, the country's second-largest market. I heard there were north of 25,000 people present. Our team was excited and well-prepared. After spending three years obsessing about our systems and standards (including building our wonderful team), they are clearer now than ever.

I've attended many market Saturdays, and it never ceases to amaze me how locked-in and excellent the team is. Despite a seemingly unending line stretching 100+ people deep, our team strives to meet each guest with enthusiasm and hospitality. This week, the team served one drink approximately every 13 seconds for 5 hours. It's a pace that still boggles my mind, and I'm continually grateful for every person who decides to spend part of their market Saturday engaging with us. It's never lost on me, nor do I ever take it for granted, when a market patron decides to get into a coffee line (for a vendor that sells just one drink option) that wraps around the block.

I still feel like I need to do a better job at setting goals, but every time I feel that wave of guilt, I come back to the idea of systems and standards. The relentless pursuit of excellence. I don't know where we'll be a year from now, but regardless of what that looks like, I hope the systems and standards are higher than ever, we pursue an even grander version of excellence, and the hospitality pushes the boundaries more than ever.

Systems and standards. Whatever you're jumping into this week, please keep this in the back of your mind. We'll all eventually fall to our systems and standards, so we ought to raise them in the meantime.

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The Confrontation Awaits

One of my kids has a fear. To me, it's a silly fear, but to him, it's crippling. Over the past few days, he's spent much time trying to avoid facing this fear. Heck, if he had his way, he could simply avoid it altogether for the next 80 years and die a happy man.

Secretly, I'd love to find ways, organically or not, to create opportunities for him to face his fear head-on. The moment he conquers this fear will be the moment he unlocks something powerful inside him. It reminds me of a conversation he and I shared a while back:

"Dad, what are you most scared of?"

"Public speaking."

"That's weird, you speak all the time. Don't people pay you money to speak?"

"Yeah, they do!"

"Why do you do that if it's your biggest fear?"

"Why do you think I started? I did it BECAUSE it was my biggest fear."

I won't sit here on my high horse claiming to be the most courageous person in the world. I'm just a dude with a bunch of silly fears who has a track record of getting better and more impactful each time I face these fears head-on.

As I see it, our fears are often one of the few barriers between us and our dreams. Between us and our callings. Between us and our meaning. If that's true, why are we going to let a silly little fear be what stops us?!?!

On most days, I spend time with people who are trying to decide whether to let their fears hold them back from living their best life. Sometimes, the person on the other end of those conversations is the person I'm staring at in the mirror.

Fear is inevitable. It won't go away. We won't grow out of it. Instead, it shifts. It takes different forms. It manifests itself in new ways. But it's here to stay. If that's true, we might as well face it head-on!

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Traditions Compound

It’s the middle of the night. 50 degrees. The sound of silence. I’m in a small tent with two little boys snuggled up to either side of me. I only have my phone to write. The battery is down to 10% and I have somewhere between zero and one bar of cell coverage. Will this post even upload?

I once had a friend give me two pieces of advice:

• Don’t be afraid to start new traditions.

• Let your traditions compound.

Whenever we lean into our traditions, we aren’t adding a new experience. We are multiplying impact. Each rep builds on the last. Something special starts to form.

The boys and I go on the same camping trip every year. We started when they were four; today they are nine. We do similar activities, live a similar schedule, and eat a predictable menu. However, each time is uniquely different. Each time is experienced through the lens of the persons we have grown into, and with the context of the past adventures.

The legend grows. The stories multiply. The reminiscing hits new levels. We all crave this trip, and the anticipation is sometimes as meaningful as the actual experience.

I love finding ways for our traditions to compound, and this trip is a constant reminder of just how real and powerful that concept is. I hope you, too, have some traditions in your life that can compound on you. It makes for a beautiful journey.

Even More Reason

I ran into a buddy at the gym yesterday, and the first thing he said to me was about yesterday's post: "What if you don't have $50,000?" It was a reference to my story about the pile of cash test, where I challenged a client to withdraw $50,000 from the bank and set it on their kitchen table before officially deciding to put $50,000 toward a vehicle.

"What if you don't have $50,000?" It's a logical and realistic question, as $50,000 is a lot of money and many people simply don't possess $50,000. My answer?

"Even more reason not to do it!!!!"

"What, so if you don't have $50,000 in the bank, you shouldn't buy a car?" my friend asked.

"No, if you don't have $50,000 in the bank, you most certainly shouldn't be spending $50,000 on a car," I replied. His eyes got big, and he looked visibly agitated.

This isn't really about cars, though it's framed through the lens of a car purchase. At the heart of the matter is our modern-day assumption that we all deserve to buy whatever we want, regardless of context or reality. And debt allows that to happen.

I reminded my friend that the most money I've ever spent on a vehicle was $20,000. Why? Because that's how much money I had allocated and saved for said purchase. I suppose I could have pulled the trigger on a $50,000, $60,000, or even $80,000 vehicle had I wanted, but sabotaging my family's finances, freedom, and future with large debt payments isn't on my wish list of life. Instead, we buy what we can afford. That applies to cars, sure, but it's also a blanket statement of life. No debt.....period.

I know this is a weird way to approach life, and for many, it might seem limiting. However, there's something beautiful that happens to our psyche when we live in reality. It's powerful to know what's on the table and what's not. I don't think about buying luxury cars because it's simply not in my family's budget. Thus, I don't want. I don't covet. I don't fantasize. Instead, I try to live a meaningful life and embrace whatever beautiful reality we've created for ourselves. I encourage you to do the same.

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$50K On the Kitchen Table

More than three years ago, I wrote about something I call the "pile of cash test." It's a little behavioral hack that can help us combat the psychological warfare caused by debt. You can read the original piece at the link above.

Well, I've used the pile of cash three times in the past month. Most notably, I have one particular story to share with you. One of my clients wanted to purchase a new vehicle, around $65,000. After accounting for their trade-in, the remaining amount due was $50,000.

I think we can all agree that $50,000 is a lot of money. Therefore, they naturally decided to finance it. Whoa, whoa, whoa!!!! I was walking alongside them while they painfully and frustratingly paid off a ton of debt, and now they want to go back into $50,000 of debt to buy a vehicle?!?!

"I don't care if you buy this vehicle," I told them. "However, if you decide to buy it, use cash. Please don't fall into this trap again."

"I don't think we would feel comfortable taking $50,000 out of savings to do this," they responded.

"I guess you don't want the vehicle that badly, then." That comment didn't go over well.

They were still waffling when we left the room. That's when I gave them the pile of cash test challenge. Go to the bank, withdraw $50,000, set it on the kitchen table, then decide how important that vehicle is.

It wasn't easy for them to withdraw $50,000 from their bank, but they did it!!! They even joked that it felt like they needed to hire armed bodyguards just to have it in their home.

The result? Here's what they wrote back: "It was an eye-opening experience. To be honest I'm not sure we could ever spend $50,000 on a car ever again after doing that. It puts much in perspective. I think we need more contentment or more humility. Maybe both."

The pile of cash test never fails. Put this one in your toolbelt for a rainy day. It just might come in handy if you're ever in need of a fresh perspective.....or a fun behavioral science experience.

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For What?

I received a question from a blog reader after yesterday's post. I don't know this man personally, but based on my handful of e-mail interactions, I respect him a lot. He's very insightful and always brings wisdom to the conversation. I also know by now that his intentions are always honest. Therefore, when he asked me a fairly intense question, I received it with the utmost respect and care.

In short, he asked why I'm so personally interested in my investments. It would appear to be an obvious answer, culturally and financially speaking, but he added some additional context based on my prior content:

• I don't believe in retirement.

• I don't plan to leave my children a large inheritance.

• I believe and practice joyful and sacrificial generosity.

• I'm anti-hoarding

• I don't care to "build wealth."

• Money, stuff, and status don't interest me.

Therefore, his sincere question has so much merit. If all that is true (and I testify that it is), why do I personally care about having investments? He didn't say this, but based on the fact pattern I shared above, it's possible that I'm a liar, a hypocrite, or don't quite follow the principles I teach. Again, this is me saying this (not my friend!). Why, then, do I personally care about investments?

I responded to his message, but after pondering it more, I thought it might make for an interesting blog post. Why do I believe all those things above, yet still have personal investments?

It's a two-part answer:

• A day will come when I'm no longer physically or mentally able to do good work. I hope that time doesn't arrive until my 80s, but it will most certainly arrive at some point. When that happens, I want to ensure we can financially care for ourselves.

• A day might come when I leave this planet before Sarah does. Statistically, men typically die sooner than women. As such, I want to make sure Sarah will be financially cared for after my passing.

Both of these factors lead me to pursue investment assets that can someday achieve one or both of these objectives. Something interesting happens along the way, though, when we perceive retirement investing through this atypical lens. The math looks different, easier. When you won't need retirement funds until later in life, the math says we need to contribute less money for a shorter period of time (since the wonders of compounding have more years to cook).

What that means in my household is that nearly eight years ago, we realized that if we are good stewards and ensure our investments are well managed, we might not need to contribute much more (if any) to meet our two long-term goals stated above. In other words, we're probably going to (eventually) be fine with what we already have invested, so investing more would only serve our own materialism, pride, or selfish endeavors.

Therefore, we made a very odd but definitive decision approximately eight years ago. We will commit to never investing again. No more contributions. No more pushing. No more building. No more more. Enough is enough because enough is enough.

It's a weird journey to follow, and oftentimes difficult given my strong bend toward finance and "winning," but living life with an external focus rewires our souls. It connects us to people unlike anything else I can compare. I'm not necessarily advocating that people try to adopt this way of viewing life, but perhaps it will give you something interesting to ponder today.

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