The Moment I Knew

One of my commercial clients is comprised of three young, talented, hungry owners. They are brilliant at their craft, but not accomplished business owners.....yet. In the midst of trying to grow their newish business, they lost a key client. Many of their aspirations for near-term growth skidded to a halt, replaced by a sudden need to piece together a few deals to stay afloat.

One of them recently reached out with a question. I immediately called them back and happened to catch them while they were driving across the state for a work project. One of the owners said something to me that quickly caught my attention. They recently purchased a mobile Starlink unit so they have high-speed internet in their vehicle on road trips. Why? "While we're on the road, the two people who aren't driving spend time contacting and pitching everyone. Old clients, warm prospects, cold prospects.....everyone."

That's the moment I knew they were going to be just fine. Being brilliant at our craft isn't enough. Often, it takes a mastery of our craft combined with a relentlessness and humility to just go for it. What makes these three individuals unique is that they are impervious to failure. They could have 1,000 doors violently slam in their face, only to knock on the 1,001st door with full confidence that it will be a "yes."

I wish I had that same relentlessness gear they do. I've been thinking a lot about that conversation, and it's forced me to look in the mirror with my own attitude and approach. For as successful as I feel like I've been, I can't help but wonder what things would look like if I developed a gear like these three have. It's an interesting thought experiment, and it pushes me out of my comfort zone. Maybe you need a similar nudge today. A nudge to develop a relentlessness and motor to keep going, regardless of how many shut doors you encounter. Something to think about as you go about your day. Have an awesome one!

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Whatever Means

A friend recently asked me a very pointed question. Based on some of the things I've said in recent posts about creating and shipping, this friend wanted to know if I think everyone should be publishing a blog or recording a podcast. I've never actually thought about that question before, and I was a bit surprised this person believed that was my position.

While it's true that I often discuss the idea of creating and shipping, I find myself speaking through the lens of writing and podcasting because that's my palette, my canvas. I actually don't think I'm called to write, or podcast, or speak, or (fill in the blank here). Rather, my calling is to serve others with whatever means I can use.

You have the same calling. However, "whatever means" varies greatly from person to person. For some, it's doing plumbing. For others, it's teaching children. For some, it's writing computer code. For others, it's being an accountant. Each one of us possesses skills, passions, and influence that we can choose to use to serve others.

"Choose" is the key word. We have a choice. We all have a choice. Every day we wake up with a choice. Will I use my skills, passions, and influence to make a difference today?

When I left my prior career to serve people in a different way, all I knew was that I was going to use financial coaching as my means for impact. Then came podcasting (which I never saw coming). Then came speaking (which I never saw coming). Then came writing (which I never saw coming). Then came consulting (which I never saw coming). Then came Northern Vesse (which I never, never, never, never saw coming). None of those were my callings. My calling was to serve people with my skills, passions, and influence, and those ended up being the means by which I could bring those things to life.

Be willing to get creative with the means. You have skills. You have passions. You have influence. Be willing to approach your life with a clean slate on how you can use those things to serve people. Your best ways may still be in front of you.

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The 20-Year Reverse Age Gap

One of my friends retired two years ago at 53. He's one of those men who always seemed younger than his age. He had a little extra pep in his step; another gear. Perhaps that's what made him so successful in his career, leading him to a point where he could afford to retire at age 53. Boy, was he ever dreaming for that day to come!!! He couldn't wait to peace out and stop working. For the past two years, he's lived his dream of pursuing a life of leisure. Lots of golf, lots of relaxation, lots of time in his shop.

He and I recently reconnected. I say this with the utmost respect, and he gave me permission to write about it, but he looks terrible! He looks like he has aged two decades in the past two years. No health issues. From all accounts, he's a generally healthy dude. When we talk, that spark he used to have is gone. That extra pep in his step is missing. He admitted that retirement life wasn't what he was expecting. There's something missing, but he can't quite put his finger on it.

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I recently chatted with another friend. She's 75 years old and still fully engaged in her career. She's one of the most joyful, energetic people I know. When it comes to peps in steps and extra gears, she's the definition. I've known her for about a decade, and all I've known is joy, energy, passion, and purpose. The world tells her she should retire to "finally enjoy life," all the while, all she's doing is enjoying life! She and I regularly talk about work. She speaks so highly of her career, proud of what she's built. The little meaning in her day-to-day. The joy of serving her clients well. Getting up in the morning and knowing there's a purpose to the day. Yeah, she enjoys her family, friends, and travel, but her work still provides purpose.

This friend redefines our culture's perspective on "enjoying life." She could be sitting on a beach, yet here she is, making more of an impact than ever before. Not at the expense of her happiness and enjoyment, but as one of the primary contributors to her happiness and enjoyment. I never want to use the word "hero" lightly, but she's a hero of mine. I watch how she handles herself, and I aspire to be more like her.

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These two friends have a 20-year age gap, but their ages might as well be reversed. Is it luck? Is it health? Is it genetics? I can't prove it, but I can't help but think about how much their career choices have influenced this counterintuitive discrepancy. Someday, I'd like to conduct a study on this topic, but in the meantime, the overwhelming anecdotal evidence I witness day in and day out continues to affirm that work matters far more than we give it credit for.

A tip of my cap to you, my friend. You inspire me and countless others!

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26 and Dreaming

I recently met with a young 26-year-old man who was interested in having me review his finances and give him a few pointers. Early in the conversation, I asked the same question I always ask: "How about your work? Tell me about your work."

He danced around the point for a few minutes, sharing little details about all the compensation and benefits he receives from his employer. He never really answered my question, so I asked again. "How do you really feel about your work?"

"Honestly, I dream about retirement every day." He continued to share about how he doesn't find any meaning in his job, but it pays well and feels secure, so if he just sticks with it, he'll probably be able to retire by 60 at the latest.

This young guy is just three years into his career, and he's already dreaming about quitting work 34 years from now?!?! As much as I'd like to say this guy is weird, his sentiment is shared by millions. He's already conceded that he's going to hate work for the next 3+ decades, but his longing for an eventual life of leisure will hopefully pull him through.

He asked me if his math about how he can retire by age 60 is wrong. It wasn't. The math is fine. Sure, he can absolutely follow this plan and "finally" quit working by age 60, but I had something else to add: "I think you deserve far better than this plan. I think you deserve to wake up every day for the next 34 years excited for what you're about to do."

He thought that was an absurd idea. He had never considered that to be a viable option. It's interesting what our culture tells us. What will he do? Only time will tell. He can absolutely retire by his mid-to-late 50s if he really wants, but I think burning the next 30 years of his life would be a shame.

I think he deserves better. I think you deserve better. I think I deserve better. The only question is whether each of us will pursue that better.

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A Different Kind of Independence Day

I received a fun message yesterday. One of our blog readers wanted to wish me a happy Independence Day, but "a different kind of Independence Day."

Beginning next week, her husband starts a new job. Beginning next week, they are proclaiming independence from "work that sucks their soul." Not independence from work, but independence from work that lacks meaning.

She shared in her message that there will be consequences. Most notably, this job switch will delay their retirement by 5-7 years. However, as she noted, this brings to mind two different thoughts:

1. It's worth giving up 5-7 years of retirement if those 5-7 years can actually bring meaning, joy, and fulfillment.

2. If this work is as meaningful as they believe it will be, it will be a better life than any life of leisure can bring.

Amazing! Sometimes, when I look in the mirror and ask myself why I spend hundreds of hours per year writing this blog and recording the podcast, stories like this remind me exactly why we do what we do. Our sole objective is to bend the needle for how our culture views work and money. When we hear these types of stories, it gives us a glimpse into the progress being made. Today, I celebrate them. Their lives will never be the same, and for that, I'm grateful.

"A different kind of Independence Day." It has a nice ring to it.

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Choose Your Waste

I recently had an interesting conversation with an early 30-something. Through the course of the discussion, he confessed that he hates his job. This isn't surprising considering 70% of Americans dislike or hate their jobs. Here's the surprising part, though. He said he knew he was going to hate it BEFORE he started his career 10 years ago! That's right. Coming out of college, he knew he was going to hate what was about to unfold.

"Why didn't you do something different?" I asked.

"I paid tens of thousands for my degree. I didn't want to waste it."

Many of you can relate to this sentiment. It's something I hear all the time in my work. Who we are at 28, 38, and 48 is usually different from who we were when we were 18-year-old kids. Life changes.....we change. Therefore, this feeling of not wanting to "waste" our degree hits close to home for many.

Here's what I told him. First, nothing is wasted. While a degree might list a major, it's more than a piece of paper with an industry title. It's the culmination of years of classes, relationships, experiences, failures, and growth. Much of what happened during that season of life will absolutely be repurposed in subsequent seasons of life, even if in different fields.

Second, let's pretend what I said above is dead wrong and a career change would result in my friend "wasting" his degree. Would he rather waste his degree or waste his life? Waste four years of his life that happened a decade ago, or waste the next four decades of his life?

It's an idea worth pondering today. Millions of people are sitting on degrees, tenure, and industry experience they are afraid to "waste." However, we need to choose our waste carefully. Life is far too precious to allow a decision from years past to sabotage our future.

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Everything Can Be Something, Something Can Be Everything

Yesterday's post struck a nerve with people, both in tremendously positive ways and profoundly negative ways. I expected as much, given how countercultural my perspective on retirement is. If you haven't read it yet, I recommend you check out YESTERDAY'S POST.

I concluded the piece with a snippy little comment, "That's what happens when we choose not to throw away all of our wisdom, experience, relationships, influence, skills, and knowledge. Or he could just keep tinkering in his garage and tending to his garden."

Ironically, I received a fun message from my friend Randy about this. Randy, a retired man himself, pointed out that one of his fellow retiree friends actually has a massive garden. He and his wife find great joy working the land, seeing the product of planting, watering, and caring for their crops. In fact, they yield so much produce from their garden that they give much of it away.

I couldn't love this more. And no, this doesn't contradict what I said yesterday. Randy wasn't intending for it to contradict me, either. Instead, Randy was joyfully pointing out an important concept. Nobody gets to define what "work that matters" is. For many, a garden is simply a garden. It's a way to pass the time; keep busy. For this couple, though, it's so much more. It provides the three key ingredients that define "work that matters": meaning, fulfillment, and impact. They find meaning in the work, sharing the experience together. They feel a sense of fulfillment seeing the fruits of their labor (pun intended). They create impact by giving generously. Everything can be something. Something can be everything. A garden could just be a garden, but to this couple, it's so much more.

This leads to another e-mail I received from my soon-to-be-retired friend, Dave. Like Randy, Dave is one of those people I respect so dang much. When either of these men talks, I listen. Dave recommended that I continue to define what "work that matters" is. More specifically, perhaps we need to define what it's not. "Work" doesn't just mean something we do in exchange for financial rewards. The gardening couple mentioned above works on their big, beautiful garden. That's still work. But to them, it's work that matters.

To many, including my friend Dave, volunteering is "work that matters." Volunteering, as the name implies, is unpaid. But if you've ever served an organization in a volunteer capacity, you know two things: 1) It's unpaid (duh!), and 2) it's work! I've volunteered for so many organizations, including a 10-year stretch as a high school youth group leader. It's work....hard work! But it's so, so rewarding. Work that matters!

Everything can be something. Something can be everything. Collectively, we need to continue bending our culture around retirement. Yeah, we can listen to the prevailing culture and selfishly pursue an inward-facing life of leisure. Alternatively, we can pursue work that matters. The beautiful part of that idea is that everything can be something, and something can be everything. The world is our oyster, waiting for us to find the most meaningful, fulfilling, and impactful work suited for us. Embrace the journey!

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The Lie of Lies

I recently sat down with a newer retiree. It's a man in his early 60s. His kids are young adults, pursuing their own dreams, aspirations, and careers. His wife was a stay-at-home mom for the majority of their child-rearing years. He had an objectively successful corporate job, which he generally enjoyed. After years of discipline, diligence, and patience, he had enough financial resources to ride off into the sunset and fulfill the American dream of living a life of leisure (i.e., stop working).

Uh oh, he fell for the lie! Even before we sat down, I knew how this conversation was going to play out. Sure enough, and right on cue, he shared the same story I hear over and over and over. He followed the conventional wisdom of our society by pursuing a life of leisure. After all, work is bad. Work is a necessary evil. Work is something we do because we have to, and naturally, as soon as we don't have to do it, we should quit doing it. He followed this mode of operation to a T. He knocked it out of the park financially, so he quit.

That's the lie! He fell for it! I don't say that to disparage him, though, because most of us fall for the same lie. He's two years into his retirement, bored and frustrated. He used to have influence, make an impact, be productive, and serve others well. He willingly (and excitedly) exchanged that for sleeping in, tending his garden, cooking more meals, and tinkering in his garage. As he thinks about this trade-off, he feels scammed. He gave up so much meaning, and for what? Leisure. Rest. "Nothingness," as he put it.

His problem wasn't leaving his prior job. His problem was walking away from something without walking toward something else. He wishes he could go back. He desperately wishes he could go back. But he can't. Here was my challenge for him: Pursue work that matters. Whatever that means in this season of life, pursue it with the same vigor, curiosity, and excitement he pursued his work during his 20s. His life isn't over. Heck, in many ways, it's just beginning. He might have 20-25 solid, productive years left in him. After these last two years, he recognizes he still has so much more to give.

I'm gonna go out on a limb and predict that he will make more impact in the next 5-10 years (whatever he ends up pursuing) than he made in the entirety of his prior 40-year career. That's how it works. That's what happens when we choose not to throw away all of our wisdom, experience, relationships, influence, skills, and knowledge.

Or he could just keep tinkering in his garage and tending to his garden. That's what society says he should do. Society says he deserves that. Society says he's earned that. Maybe so.....or maybe, just maybe, he deserves to live with purpose and meaning. Either way, it's time for the next chapter to be written.

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How You See It

I had an experience last night that perfectly exemplifies a concept I talk about often. I was at a steakhouse with a few buddies, and we worked our way into a fun conversation with our server. This dude was fantastic! He showed great hospitality, expertise in the menu, and exhibited an energy that made us excited to be there. Then, in the middle of the conversation, he mentioned something interesting.

His son recently asked him a question: "Dad, why don't you complain about your job all the time like Mom does?" First, ouch! Second, that's a wild observation. His response to his son? "I love my job! I get paid to make people happy!" Based on the context he provided, his wife has a more prestigious job and is considered more "successful." Yet, here he is rocking out his server job with joy, passion, and meaning.

It's how you see it. He could look at his job with a glass-half-empty perspective and say, "I bring people food" or "I wait tables." Some people say those things to themselves and wallow in misery. This man, however, obviously approaches his job with joy and vigor. He understands his role in people's lives, how he can add value, and he executes. I already want to go back to visit with him. I want to take steps to be within his aura. I want to feel the way he made me feel. That's meaningful, and I'm so glad he recognizes that. No matter what society says, that man is ultra successful in my book! He's made it!

Everything is how you see it. You can see things in your life one way.....or another. You can obsess about all the sucky parts of your job......or delight in the good parts. You can dwell on all your crappy co-workers.....or focus your attention and energy on the awesome ones. You can compare your job to someone else's job and look on in envy.....or you can recognize that countless people would love to be in your shoes. It's how you see it.

Perspective is everything, and we all need the occasional wake-up call. Maybe today is yours. One of these days it will be mine. It's all how we see it.

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Slowing Down?

One of my friends recently asked me an interesting question. First, some context. This friend is in his early 50s, and he’s obsessed with the idea of retirement. His work gives him much dread, and he’s fully living into the often-discussed statistic about how 70% of Americans either dislike or hate their jobs. In his case, “hate” is the appropriate word. His strategy is simple: tolerate the misery, hoard as many resources as he can, and hopefully, by the time he’s in his early 60s, he’ll have enough money to retire and “finally enjoy life.” In other words, his vision is to hate his life for another decade, then ride off into the sunset to live a life he believes will be far superior to the one he’s currently living.

Here was his question: “Do you look forward to slowing down?” This was a reference to my work and to my often-published perspective on doing it for the rest of my life. Short answer: no, I don’t look forward to slowing down. Given my perspective on the topic, the act of slowing down will likely be the result of declining energy and/or fading health. Therefore, no, I don’t look forward to slowing down. This mentality obviously flies in the face of our culture’s view of work and money. The world says we should aggressively pursue a life of leisure, and if we have the financial resources to make it happen, the sooner the better. However, if we are continuously pursuing work that matters, then, hypothetically speaking, we should find ourselves perpetually waking up excited to engage in our work. Our work should ADD to our lives, not negatively impact them. 

What if we don’t enjoy our work anymore? Well, that doesn’t mean we should just quit work! Rather, it means we should seek to change the work we’re pursuing. Life is about seasons. As we grow, evolve, and experience new things, the definition of “work that matters” may evolve as well. I’ve already made many shifts in my work since I left my prior career in 2019 to start my own company. Some of my work is identical, some has morphed, and some is completely different. It doesn’t mean I was wrong; it means I’ve changed. And that’s a good thing!!

I know I’ll need to slow down someday. It’s inevitable. I don’t look forward to that, but I will absolutely embrace it for whatever it is. As long as I’m pursuing work that matters to me at that stage of life, at whatever intensity God allows me to pursue it, it will be a win. That’s what success looks like to me. Perhaps you have a different perspective on the topic. If so, that’s okay! On the flip side, maybe this will give you something to ponder today. If so, I hope you find it valuable. Let’s crush the day. 

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Their Opinions Don’t Matter

Today's post is courtesy of my guy Ryan. I'm not sure Ryan has ever read the blog, but we talk about it often, and he knows me better than most people on earth. So, when he texts me a link and a message that reads "feels like a blog," I know it's about to be good. He sent me a link to the following VIDEO CLIP. The actual video is a bit long, so I'll summarize. It's about how, coming out of high school, Patrick Mahomes was ranked the 22nd best quarterback of the 2014 graduating class. In other words, the experts believed there were 21 other quarterbacks better than who we now know to be one of the best quarterbacks who has ever lived. Well, we know how that worked out.

Other people's opinions don't matter. They just don't. I've watched countless aspirations go up in flames due to the inappropriate, unnecessary, unwarranted, and unsolicited words of well-intentioned people. When our confidence and convictions are already on shaky ground, it doesn't take much from the outside to topple our house-of-cards psyche. It's a good thing their opinions don't matter!

One of the closest people in my life called me a "f'ing idiot" when I left my prior career to start my own company and begin the journey I'm now on. Fortunately for me, when those words were muttered to me, I already knew other people's opinions don't matter. I'm so glad I didn't care. I'm so glad I knew back then that we shouldn't care what other people think.

I'm sure Patrick Mahomes had plenty of well-intended people around him who advised that he hang it up and pursue a "safer," "more stable" career. I'm glad he didn't listen to them. Their opinions didn't matter, and fortunately for Patrick, history will look different upon him because of it.

I often tell my boys that other people's opinions don't matter. When it comes to their callings and aspirations, my opinions don't matter, either. I'll definitely have opinions, and I'll probably share them, but along the way, I need them to know that ultimately, they don't matter.

Whatever you are called to do, block out the noise. Don't listen to people's opinions. Will you succeed? Will you fall flat on your face? Who knows, but at least give yourself the opportunity to find out for yourself rather than taking the advice of people whose opinions don't matter. Sure, Patrick Mahomes could have been an all-time bust. But instead, he has three Super Bowl rings. Remember that.

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1 Trip, 2 Wins

I recently received an e-mail from a blog reader that encouraged me. So much so that I think it will encourage you, too! Here's an excerpt, word for word:

"I went on my first vacation since changing jobs. 2 things stood out to me.

1. I've never been more excited for a vacation before. For the first time in my life it felt like my vacation wasn't to get away from a job I hated. Instead it felt like a celebration of my recent hard work or "work that matters" as you often say it. It was an actual time of rest and gratefulness, which felt weird to me.

2. I was actually excited to go back to work. I know you talk about this all the time, but I'm not sure I actually believed you. It's true! I was just as excited to go back to work as I was to go on vacation. It was a weird feeling!

Thank you for challenging me and forcing me to see work in a different way. More important, for convincing me that "work that matters" applies to me too."

I don't want to add much to this. I think it's so beautiful to see someone have the courage and conviction to pursue work that matters, even if it means making decisions that may fly in the face of friends, family, co-workers, and our culture as a whole. Work that matters matters, and it's right in front of each of us. This person reached out and seized it. Just one vacation in, and he already sees the truth. Special times for him and his family. I wish him well on this new journey, and I wish the same to you, too.

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From Principal to Janitor

I recently stumbled upon a beautiful story that caught my eye. It was a two-and-a-half-minute story on CBS Sunday Morning. It's about a man named David White, who retired at age 58 after 33 years of dutiful service to his local school district. Much of that time, as a Principal. Not just some average principal, but an award-winning, Atlanta Principal of the Year-level principal.

He did what many of us do. Once he was able to justify it financially, he cut the rip cord and retired. After all, that's what we're supposed to do, right? Retire as soon as we can so we can "finally enjoy life." Turns out, retirement wasn't all it was cracked up to be. He got bored, lonely.

After some soul-searching, he realized he missed his old job. Unfortunately, he couldn't just go and get his old job back. The school had already hired a new principal. A different job opened up, though, and he was intrigued! After submitting his resume and interviewing, he was hired: Janitor and handyman. He cleans the toilets, cares for the landscaping, and makes repairs. It's a far cry from being the high-paid face of the entire institution. He once had income, status, and title. Today, he has blisters, back pain, and dirty clothes. He could be chillin' at home, "finally enjoying life," yet here he is, grinding in probably the lowest-paid job he's had in decades.

"Why doesn't that bother you?" asked the interviewer, pointing out that David went from the top of the ladder to the bottom. "I still feel like I'm contributing meaningfully to a place I really care about." Yes, David, yes!

All work matters. What a beautiful example of this idea. You can find the full video clip below.

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70-Year-Old Travis

A blog reader recently reached out with a thought-provoking question. It's in reference to my repeated insistence that I don't believe in the traditional American retirement. The question was quite lengthy, so I'll paraphrase it: "Do you really expect to be working at 70 years old? What does that even look like?"

It's difficult to project what my life might look like 25 years from now, but I'll share some thoughts on this topic. Interestingly, many blog readers are even better qualified to answer, as they are living this reality of pursuing meaningful work in their 70s as we speak. In any event, I'll start. What does work look like for 70-year-old Travis?

I don't suspect I'll be ripping out endless 10-hour days, but the work will probably resemble full-time. It doesn't have to be all or nothing. How I describe this to others is the idea of shifting. Sometimes we upshift, increasing the intensity. Sometimes we make a lateral shift, merely refocusing our energies. Sometimes we downshift, decreasing the intensity. I suspect work in my 70s will be some form of a downshift from my current rhythm.

• Slower mornings, allowing me to enjoy more coffee time with Sarah, get more reading in, and stay physically active.

• A less regimented schedule. The lines between work days and weekend days get a bit blurrier. A day is a day. Life becomes more fluid. I'll work more when I have more energy and more inspiration, and less when I have less.

• More frequent travel. 4 days here, a couple of weeks there. Much of my work is probably mobile.

In terms of what work I'll be doing, it's hard to say. I don't even know what type of work I'll be doing next year, never mind 2+ decades from now. However, if I had to guess, I suspect it will be a combination of a few things:

• Pouring into the next generation of leaders.

• Building or iterating whatever enterprise I'm called to engage in.

• Serving those who wish to be served, at whatever level they wish to be served.

• Creating content and resources that will remain on earth after I depart.

I'm tremendously curious about what that stage will look like, but I don't want to rush to get there. Life is amazing now. The kids are young, I have tons of energy, and my present work matters so much to me. That future will unfold in due time, and when it does, I hope I still have the same level of conviction about always pursuing meaning and work that matters. I think future me will have a blast navigating that journey.

If you're in your 70s and living some parallel life to future me, I'd love to hear from you. What's changed with your work life since your 40s or 50s?

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The Power of Good Work

I don't know if this resonates with you, but there's something profoundly refreshing about a week of good, productive, and mentally grueling work. I'll be at the cattle ranch this week, and I'm ready for an onslaught of 12-hour days filled with challenges, wins, brain stumpers, and needle-moving accomplishments. That excites me so much!

Will this week be fun? Uhhhh, probably not. I'm sure there will be some fun moments, but this really isn't about fun. It's about making a difference, finding meaning, and adding value to others. That's what we so often get wrong about this idea of work that matters. "Work that matters" doesn't mean "fun" work, or "enjoyable" work, or "relaxing" work. It means that by doing the work, it fills something inside us that would otherwise remain empty.

Every time I talk about the importance of work in our lives, there's one particular argument that gets thrown at me. Someone tells me the story of their Uncle Joey, who, after working until the "old" age of 65, died a year after he retired. This story becomes Exhibit A for why Uncle Joey should have retired years earlier so that he could have actually "enjoyed life."

Someday, I'd like to conduct a study to possibly prove this argument, but I think the story of the Uncle Joeys of the world is backward. Passing away shortly after retirement isn't the consequence of tragic luck, but rather, the consequence of lost purpose. Work (the act of adding value to others) is vitally important to our journey. It's far more than a necessary evil. It's far more than a simple exchange of effort for money. Work checks a box deep within us that we don't always even know is there.

No, this won't be an easy week. No, it probably won't be a fun week. But man, I'm excited to be productive, serve my client well, and add value to a wonderful team that values my service. I'll never take that for granted. I hope you feel the same about what you're about to do.

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One Thing We Owe Them

During a recent group conversation, someone said something that surprised me. "My company doesn't pay me enough for me to give my best effort."

I tried not to let my eyeballs pop out of my skull, and assumed others were doing the same. Turns out, I was wrong. Instead, everyone else in the group affirmed this person's perspective. The general consensus was that if a company expects us to work hard, they should pay us more. What does "more" mean? Not sure, but it's more than whatever we're being paid today!

The last time I checked, employment is a two-way agreement. We agree to do our job, and in exchange, the company agrees to compensate us to whatever level agreed upon. Both parties have the freedom to exit the relationship, but there's an inherent understanding.

We don't owe our employers loyalty. We don't owe them our dignity. We don't owe them a boundaryless relationship. We don't owe them the right to abuse us. We don't owe them perpetual employment. But we DO owe them our best work. No matter what we're being paid, we owe the person or entity that pays us our best work in exchange for whatever compensation we've agreed on.

We might not like the compensation structure. That's fair....and valid. We have every right to pursue other opportunities. To go find an employer who will pay us more, treat us better, and/or offer a healthier culture. All of that is great, and I 100% encourage it. However, in the meantime, we still owe them that one thing: Our best work while we're being compensated.

I don't feel like this is a spicy take, but I could be surprised. Let me know. What do you think? Please hit "reply" to this e-mail or drop a comment on the webpage below. We don't owe them much, but I do believe we owe them that one thing. Let's be excellent! Let's honor these relationships.

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She Did It

11 years ago, during a run-of-the-mill youth group discussion, a young lady told me her dream was to be a stay-at-home mom one day. Her face lit up when she made this declaration; so confident, so excited. She was a gifted athlete who would eventually go on to play at the D-1 level in college, and then transition into a very successful young career in the professional world. All the while, though, her stay-at-home mom dream persisted.

Last week, I received a text message out of the blue: "Today was my last day of work!!! Tomorrow, I'll be officially working my dream job of full-time stay at home mom. YAY!"

So beautiful! I haven't had a chance to chat with her verbally yet, but I can't wait for that conversation. I'm so happy for her. I'm so excited for her. I'm so proud of her.

None of this was by accident, though. She didn't luck into it. Good fortune didn't strike her. She and her husband worked for it. They planned for it. They sacrificed for it. This has been the plan for so long, and now, they get to reap the rewards for all the discipline and dedication that led them to this moment. I'm so happy for this couple, these new parents, and this dream career my friend is about to pursue.

Our culture says it's not possible. Our culture says we're all victims of bad timing and tough economic conditions. Our culture says a single-income life is unattainable....especially for young people. Yet, dedicated, disciplined, and sacrificial couples are doing it all the time. It IS possible.....if we're willing to pay the price to make it happen.

I'm grateful my young friends are willing to pay this price, and they will undoubtedly thank their younger selves for bringing this dream to life.

Whatever your version of this is (whether being a stay-at-home parent or some other dream), do it. Don't let other people or our prevailing culture rob you of your hope, aspirations, and dreams. Fight for it. Stay persistent. Pay the price. Make it happen.

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The Flourless Cake

Have you ever baked a cake? I've baked a few in my life, and fortunately, it was under the watchful eye of my mom. As a kid, I remember using her cookbook to determine the exact ingredients in the exact ratios. My favorite ingredient was the sugar, of course. After all, that's what made the cake actually taste good. If I had my way, I probably would have elected to replace the gross-tasting flour with even more sugar. If sugar is what makes it taste good, then why not let the sugar dominate!?!? Can you imagine how bad that all-sugar, no-flour cake would have tasted? It would have been a disaster.

During a recent conversation with a client, I asked both spouses what they wanted. They both shared a similar answer. In short, their objective in life was to retire as early as possible (late 40s or early 50s) and spend more time with family.

Curious about where this was going, I asked, "And what else?"

The husband looked confused, so he cleared the air: "Nothing else. We're just going to spend time with friends and family."

Wanting to be sure I understood, I asked one more follow-up: "But nothing else?"

"Nope, we're going to relax and just spend our time with friends and family. Travel, too.....probably with family"

Perhaps this is an unpopular opinion that will be met with a violent backlash, but this seems like a flourless cake. Relaxing and spending time with loved ones is the sugar. It tastes good! It's fun. It's enjoyable. It gives life flavor. But if all we're adding to the batter is sugar, like my childhood baking example above, that's going to be one disaster of a cake.

Work. Purpose. Impact. Service. These are the flour. They don't always taste as good as the sugar, but they are what make a cake a cake. They balance out the ingredients to create something beautiful.....something delicious.

Just as we shouldn't have a flourless cake, we also shouldn't have a sugarless cake. While it might come out of the oven actually looking like a cake, it probably tastes dull and bland. Nobody wants that cake, either! We gotta have the sugar, too!

Our obsession with and idolization of retirement is turning us into a bunch of flourless cakes. We glorify a life of leisure so much in our culture that we forget to add all the ingredients to the bowl in healthy ratios.

My goal isn't to turn an entire generation into a bunch of work-obsessed robots. Rather, I deeply desire for people to see the good in their work. Further, if people understood how much value work adds to their lives, they would quit racing to the finish line (i.e., retirement) and instead pursue work that actually matters to them. Lots of sugar for taste, a healthy amount of flour to give it body, in a ratio that makes it light and fluffy. That sounds like an absolutely delicious cake!

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Back Against the Wall

There's an interesting theme I've noticed over the years. I think about this often, and it was brought up to me by a friend yesterday. When successful business owners or entrepreneurs are interviewed about their origin stories, they don't usually say, "Yeah, life was pretty good, and I was really content where I was, but I threw it all in the trash so I could start over and significantly increase the stress and risk in my life."

Rather, it's usually something more along the lines of, "I lost my job, my girlfriend broke up with me, and I was living in a dump, so I figured, 'why not give it a shot?'" I might have exaggerated that a bit, but there's usually an inflection point of pain that precipitated the career move.

Why is that? Why is it that people who built something amazing didn't start until life punched them in the face? That's a rhetorical question, as I have my own theory: OK is the worst place to be. When we're OK, we're just good enough not to want to rock the boat of life. OK means we're probably not overly miserable, overly impoverished, or overly hungry for better.

I'd argue that OK robs us of a thirst for meaning. OK allows us to say, "It could be worse," and then take steps to prevent "worse" from happening. Sure, I might not be happy, but at least I'm not miserable! Thus, we hold on to "not miserable" like our life depends on it.

On the flip side, I'm watching person after person who experienced profound pain, loss, suffering, and uncertainty pursue a much different path. A scary path. An unknown path. A non-linear path. It's the hardest thing they've ever done, yet at the same time, they report it's the most meaningful they've ever lived.

It's also funny how this group of people wouldn't wish away their painful inflection points, as that would mean wiping their eventual decision to pivot in life. Looking back, the worst thing they ever experienced led to the best.

And all it took was for their backs to be put against the wall. I don't feel bad for people who were put in absolutely terrible gut-wrenching back-against-the-wall positions. I feel bad for the people who have experienced a lot of OK without the pain. Perhaps it's time some of us put our own backs against the wall and use it as an opportunity to live the life we're meant to live. I’m not saying everyone should turn their lives upside down and abandon their jobs, but for those of you silently suffering in the discontent of OK (you know who you are), I’m talking to you!

Whether you're OK, living in deep meaning, or have your back against the wall as we speak, keep fighting for it! It's worth it. I hope you have an amazing day!

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Here

Sarah and I recently stumbled upon a fascinating film. I was scrolling through Netflix while Sarah vetoed movie after movie. Nothing sounded good to her, and she wanted me to know that. Eventually, frustrated by her unwillingness to commit, I picked something and said, "This is the one! We're going to watch it, and we're going to enjoy it." It indeed was the one.

The movie is called Here. Released last year, it stars Tom Hanks and Robin Wright, and was directed by Robert Zemeckis (the creator of Back To The Future and Forrest Gump). It's one of the most unique films I've ever watched. For example, the entire movie is set at a single camera position, and the screen never fades out; one continuous shot for 1 hour and 45 minutes. See, fascinating!

Photo Credit: IMDB

It's been nearly two days since we watched it, and I can't get it out of my head. At its core, the movie is a reflection on so many of the ideas shared in this blog:

• The pursuit (or not) of meaningful work.

• How deeply our relationships are woven into the quality of our life.

• The cultural and financial pressures to abandon our dreams.

• The struggle and joy that comes with parenting.

• The impacts (both positively and negatively) our sacrifices make in our journey.

• The haunting power of regret.

• The fleeting nature of time.

• Our inescapable need for meaning and fulfillment.

• The relational and emotional impact of debt and financial tension.

• Our human desire to establish roots.

• The beauty of the simplest and most mundane parts of our lives.

• The humbling reality of our own mortality.

• The miracle of forgiveness and redemption.

• The bonding qualities of sharing a meal together.

• The importance of celebrating major milestones in life.

It was simultaneously the saddest and most joyful thing I've watched in a while. I can't help but reflect on my own journey as a man, a husband, and a father. Life is indeed fleeting, and I ought not waste it.

If you enjoy this blog, I highly recommend you check out this film on Netflix. I can't promise you'll like it, but I can promise it will make you think. I hope you have a wonderful day, filled with beauty in both the big things and the small things.

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