Slowing Down?

One of my friends recently asked me an interesting question. First, some context. This friend is in his early 50s, and he’s obsessed with the idea of retirement. His work gives him much dread, and he’s fully living into the often-discussed statistic about how 70% of Americans either dislike or hate their jobs. In his case, “hate” is the appropriate word. His strategy is simple: tolerate the misery, hoard as many resources as he can, and hopefully, by the time he’s in his early 60s, he’ll have enough money to retire and “finally enjoy life.” In other words, his vision is to hate his life for another decade, then ride off into the sunset to live a life he believes will be far superior to the one he’s currently living.

Here was his question: “Do you look forward to slowing down?” This was a reference to my work and to my often-published perspective on doing it for the rest of my life. Short answer: no, I don’t look forward to slowing down. Given my perspective on the topic, the act of slowing down will likely be the result of declining energy and/or fading health. Therefore, no, I don’t look forward to slowing down. This mentality obviously flies in the face of our culture’s view of work and money. The world says we should aggressively pursue a life of leisure, and if we have the financial resources to make it happen, the sooner the better. However, if we are continuously pursuing work that matters, then, hypothetically speaking, we should find ourselves perpetually waking up excited to engage in our work. Our work should ADD to our lives, not negatively impact them. 

What if we don’t enjoy our work anymore? Well, that doesn’t mean we should just quit work! Rather, it means we should seek to change the work we’re pursuing. Life is about seasons. As we grow, evolve, and experience new things, the definition of “work that matters” may evolve as well. I’ve already made many shifts in my work since I left my prior career in 2019 to start my own company. Some of my work is identical, some has morphed, and some is completely different. It doesn’t mean I was wrong; it means I’ve changed. And that’s a good thing!!

I know I’ll need to slow down someday. It’s inevitable. I don’t look forward to that, but I will absolutely embrace it for whatever it is. As long as I’m pursuing work that matters to me at that stage of life, at whatever intensity God allows me to pursue it, it will be a win. That’s what success looks like to me. Perhaps you have a different perspective on the topic. If so, that’s okay! On the flip side, maybe this will give you something to ponder today. If so, I hope you find it valuable. Let’s crush the day. 

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Their Opinions Don’t Matter

Today's post is courtesy of my guy Ryan. I'm not sure Ryan has ever read the blog, but we talk about it often, and he knows me better than most people on earth. So, when he texts me a link and a message that reads "feels like a blog," I know it's about to be good. He sent me a link to the following VIDEO CLIP. The actual video is a bit long, so I'll summarize. It's about how, coming out of high school, Patrick Mahomes was ranked the 22nd best quarterback of the 2014 graduating class. In other words, the experts believed there were 21 other quarterbacks better than who we now know to be one of the best quarterbacks who has ever lived. Well, we know how that worked out.

Other people's opinions don't matter. They just don't. I've watched countless aspirations go up in flames due to the inappropriate, unnecessary, unwarranted, and unsolicited words of well-intentioned people. When our confidence and convictions are already on shaky ground, it doesn't take much from the outside to topple our house-of-cards psyche. It's a good thing their opinions don't matter!

One of the closest people in my life called me a "f'ing idiot" when I left my prior career to start my own company and begin the journey I'm now on. Fortunately for me, when those words were muttered to me, I already knew other people's opinions don't matter. I'm so glad I didn't care. I'm so glad I knew back then that we shouldn't care what other people think.

I'm sure Patrick Mahomes had plenty of well-intended people around him who advised that he hang it up and pursue a "safer," "more stable" career. I'm glad he didn't listen to them. Their opinions didn't matter, and fortunately for Patrick, history will look different upon him because of it.

I often tell my boys that other people's opinions don't matter. When it comes to their callings and aspirations, my opinions don't matter, either. I'll definitely have opinions, and I'll probably share them, but along the way, I need them to know that ultimately, they don't matter.

Whatever you are called to do, block out the noise. Don't listen to people's opinions. Will you succeed? Will you fall flat on your face? Who knows, but at least give yourself the opportunity to find out for yourself rather than taking the advice of people whose opinions don't matter. Sure, Patrick Mahomes could have been an all-time bust. But instead, he has three Super Bowl rings. Remember that.

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Kristian, I Want to Play a Game

Yesterday was my final full day in Colombia. I woke up in a hotel connected to a shopping mall in a city called Neiva. After a productive morning of meetings, we packed our bags and headed into the mall for lunch. I gotta tell you, the energy in that mall was electric! Literally thousands of people were there shopping, eating, drinking, playing, and conversing. It reminded me of America’s vibrant mall culture in the late 90s. Safe to say I was digging it!

After realizing that almost every other restaurant and food court was absolutely slammed, the team selected a quieter little restaurant within the mall. Immediately after being seated, we started scanning the menu. 

I have a rule when I travel abroad. I won’t eat anything that I am familiar with or can readily get in America. One of the best ways to learn someone’s culture and build relationships is through shared experiences with THEIR cuisine. 

“Kristian, I want to play a game.” Kristian is the husband of our team leader. He and I had some fun bonding time this week, and I knew our time was coming to an end (which is always sad). I explained to him that I wanted him to order me whatever he was going to order for himself, and not tell me anything about it. I wanted to be surprised, then enjoy. No limits, no rules. 

Every time each of us sits down at a restaurant, we bring our biases, fears, and experiences to the table. Subconsciously, our minds tell us to find something familiar, something comfortable. I would do it, too! But when we treat it as a game and make ourselves uncomfortable by throwing away the rule book, amazing things can happen. 

After a bit, the server delivered the most beautiful-looking dish to me. As was the case with nearly every meal I had in Colombia, it was amazing and it offered a great opportunity to bond over the experience. Kristian won the game, but I was the real winner for having such a special opportunity to learn more about Colombian culture and further build those relationships. 

Nearly every meal this week was a game, an opportunity, a blessing. Yes, this post is about food. But food is never really about food. It’s about connection, experiences, memories, and relationships. Most of us probably won’t be visiting another country this week, but here is my challenge. Next time you have a chance to experience a meal with someone (even your spouse or your children), seize the opportunity to step out of your comfort zone and create a unique memory together. You may or may not like the dish you’re served, but those memories, experiences, and relationships will persist for decades!

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From What We Have

I've talked about this concept many times on this blog over the past four years, but last night I experienced its purest form. We often make giving overcomplicated. We factor in all our bills, obligations, and other financial commitments, then assess whether there's enough remaining to give. Since we are human and our brains are wired a certain way, there's rarely anything left to give, regardless of our income. Thus, we elect not to give.

Put through its proper lens, giving should be much simpler. "What do I have to give?" we should ask ourselves. After all, we are called to give from what we have, not from what we don't have. If I have something, I should give it. If I don't, I shouldn't. This means financial resources, of course, but it should also include skills, experience, passion, relationships, influence, etc.

If I have the skills and experience to help businesses, some of that skill and experience should be given freely to serve others. If I have a relationship that would be valuable to someone else's endeavors, I should give that freely to help others.

In our Palmful of Coffee curriculum, we again go back Biblical to giving in its simplest form. We give from what we have, not from what we don't have. This concept can and will set us free. It allows us to practice generosity regardless of our current life situation. It allows us to stop comparing ourselves to others and simply give, knowing that all blessings matter.

Last night, it came full circle. As I sat in the front row of church in a Colombian village, I watched giving, in its simplest form, play out in real time. Men, fresh out of the fields in the nearby mountains, carried a large sack of green coffee beans to the front of the church and placed it at the base of the podium. Then another man. Then another man. Soon, the base of the podium was lined with some of the world's best coffee. These men might not have had a lot of financial resources, but they had coffee, beautiful coffee.

While we call this program Palmful of Coffee, it's not strictly about coffee. It's about giving from what you have, not from what you don't. Most church members had coffee, but some had milk, yogurt, corn, lemons, eggs, papaya, etc. That's what they brought. They didn't look in the mirror and say, "I don't have coffee, so I guess I can't participate." No, they looked in their storehouses and saw freshly picked papaya, then elected to give from what they had.

We make this too complicated. ALL of us have something to give. And if we would stop comparing ourselves to everyone else, we would recognize the beautiful opportunity we each have to simply give from what we have. Last night was one of the most special nights of my life, and I will surely remember it forever. But this lesson of Palmful of Coffee, give from what we have, can remain with each one of us every day for the rest of our lives as well.

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Gutted….In the Best Way

Have you ever shared a sopping-wet, makeshift charcuterie board with a 9-year-old sitting at the base of an old oak tree in the pitch-black at 10 PM on a weeknight? Me, neither, until a few nights ago.

Please allow me to rewind. The day before I left the country was a whirlwind. Aside from me being swamped with meetings and errands, the boys had an all-day birthday friend party at a local amusement park. Immediately following the birthday party, they had VBS at a friend's church. Finally, after being gone for 11 hours, they returned home with a burning desire to start a bonfire in the backyard.

Knowing I needed to leave for the airport in the middle of the night, I obliged and enabled their little boy pyromania to run wild. We messed around with the fire for about an hour. Then, Finn realized he hadn't eaten since lunch. Sarah graciously assembled a makeshift charcuterie board on a paper plate and delivered it to the fire pit.

"Dad, will you come sit with me by that tree?" he asked, pointing to the darkest corner of the yard. How could I refuse that invite!?!? We sat together for about 30 minutes, chomping on summer sausage, crackers, and orange slices. He meandered all sorts of ridiculous topics, each funnier than the last.

That moment gutted me.....in the best way. This little boy just wanted to spend time with his dad. That's it. In its purest form, he just wanted me present. He and I both left the elephant in the room unsaid: I would soon leave the country, and there would be thousands of miles between us. But for those 30 minutes, nothing existed but for him, me, and a paper plate of makeshift charcuterie that he would eventually drench with his water bottle (because he's a clumsy little boy). Did you know that butter crackers taste "butter-y-er" when wet? It's science.....believe him. I don't think he's wrong; I sampled the evidence myself.

I felt pretty crappy walking out of the house at 3 AM yesterday morning to drive to the airport. It's a feeling I get every time I travel (especially internationally), as I miss those guys so much. However, at least I knew that I made the most of the precious moments I was granted. I'm so glad I took advantage of those ridiculous opportunities, especially chomping on soggy crackers at the base of a pitch-black tree at 10 PM on a weeknight with a cool little man.

Life is weird. Take advantage of every weird and quirky opportunity it presents. We're not promised an infinite amount of them.

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Comfort Is the Enemy

My favorite line from one of my keynote talks is, "Comfort is the enemy of progress, and failure is the admission price to success." We live in a culture that's obsessed with comfort. We seek comfort at all costs. We use our time, resources, influence, and experience to obtain whatever comfort is available to us. In fact, many facets of comfort have become status symbols for "winning" in this country.

On the flip side, despite my undeniable human attraction to comfort, I detest it. About a decade ago, I realized that comfort was the primary factor in preventing me from living my calling, my purpose. The pursuit of comfort often forces us to make decisions that subvert our ability to make an impact and find meaning. Comfort is a drug that sedates us, medicates us, lulls us into a complacent state.

Today, I'm embarking on a new adventure. I'm going somewhere I've never been, engaging with people I’ve never met. I'm about to be tremendously uncomfortable. I'll be the only person who doesn't know the language. Nearly 100% of my communication will be via translators. Will they accept me? Will they like me? Will they respect me? Will they value my ideas? These are all natural thoughts that stem from aggressively pursuing discomfort. Heck, I've been uncomfortable for a few weeks just thinking about it.

Despite all that, I also understand the flip side. Without discomfort, I have no chance of making a difference. Without discomfort, I'm waiving my right to create impact. Without discomfort, life simply wouldn't be as rich.

In a matter of hours, every aspect of "normal" will turn on its head. I'm not ready for it, yet at the same time, I couldn't be more ready. I crave the awe, wonder, and curiosity that discomfort brings. It will be scary....it will be amazing. It will be trying.....it will be beautiful.

Comfort is the enemy. Discomfort is our friend. I look forward to sharing more about this journey over the next week. Blessed to have you here.

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“What’s In It For You?”

A few weeks ago, I found myself in a fascinating conversation with a handful of friends. The conversation meandered to generosity. Knowing that generosity is one of my favorite topics in the world, one of the men at the table asked me a question: "What's in it for you? Why are you so into this stuff? What are you getting out of it?"

"Nothing. That's the point," I responded. In order for our giving to be true generosity, we can't receive anything in return. If we give and expect something in return, that's a transaction. That's done with motives, not a generous spirit.

"But why?" my friend continued to press. "If you're not getting anything in return, why not just spend it on yourself?"

Ah, now we were getting to the true heart of the topic. There's a cultural thread woven into the fabric of our society that says that if we earn it, it's ours to enjoy on ourselves. While this is legally true, it's not the highest and best use of our resources. When I look at the resources I'm blessed with, there's a tension at play. I can spend on my wants......or spend on other people's needs. If I don't put a pool in my backyard, my kids have to use the public pool. If those starving children don't eat, they might die. If I don't buy another pair of boots, I might not be as color-coordinated. If that family can't get their utility bill paid, they won't have running water. The math feels simple to me. Money spent on other people's needs has a significantly higher ROI than money spent on my own wants. I’m not saying there’s anything inherently wrong with spending money on pools or boots; I’m just trying to paint a picture of how my brain works.

We do actually get something from our giving, though. Heart change. When we give without expecting anything in return, something inside us changes. A selfish little piece inside of us dies, and something new is born. Each act of giving rips us apart a little more, a little more, a little more. If we're not careful, we might inadvertently undergo a full heart surgery. The old us is gone, replaced by someone new.

"What's in it for you?" Nothing.....and everything.

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70-Year-Old Travis

A blog reader recently reached out with a thought-provoking question. It's in reference to my repeated insistence that I don't believe in the traditional American retirement. The question was quite lengthy, so I'll paraphrase it: "Do you really expect to be working at 70 years old? What does that even look like?"

It's difficult to project what my life might look like 25 years from now, but I'll share some thoughts on this topic. Interestingly, many blog readers are even better qualified to answer, as they are living this reality of pursuing meaningful work in their 70s as we speak. In any event, I'll start. What does work look like for 70-year-old Travis?

I don't suspect I'll be ripping out endless 10-hour days, but the work will probably resemble full-time. It doesn't have to be all or nothing. How I describe this to others is the idea of shifting. Sometimes we upshift, increasing the intensity. Sometimes we make a lateral shift, merely refocusing our energies. Sometimes we downshift, decreasing the intensity. I suspect work in my 70s will be some form of a downshift from my current rhythm.

• Slower mornings, allowing me to enjoy more coffee time with Sarah, get more reading in, and stay physically active.

• A less regimented schedule. The lines between work days and weekend days get a bit blurrier. A day is a day. Life becomes more fluid. I'll work more when I have more energy and more inspiration, and less when I have less.

• More frequent travel. 4 days here, a couple of weeks there. Much of my work is probably mobile.

In terms of what work I'll be doing, it's hard to say. I don't even know what type of work I'll be doing next year, never mind 2+ decades from now. However, if I had to guess, I suspect it will be a combination of a few things:

• Pouring into the next generation of leaders.

• Building or iterating whatever enterprise I'm called to engage in.

• Serving those who wish to be served, at whatever level they wish to be served.

• Creating content and resources that will remain on earth after I depart.

I'm tremendously curious about what that stage will look like, but I don't want to rush to get there. Life is amazing now. The kids are young, I have tons of energy, and my present work matters so much to me. That future will unfold in due time, and when it does, I hope I still have the same level of conviction about always pursuing meaning and work that matters. I think future me will have a blast navigating that journey.

If you're in your 70s and living some parallel life to future me, I'd love to hear from you. What's changed with your work life since your 40s or 50s?

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Parable of the Oat Milk

We have an oat milk problem at Northern Vessel. For the past four years, we've continually experienced these sharp little moments when we've simply run out of it (or nearly ran out). Considering this ingredient is the base of our most famous and best-selling drink (oat milk cold brew latte), running out of oat milk is a disastrous scenario. As recently as a month ago, TJ and I spent one Saturday afternoon driving to every single Target in the metro, hoping to scoop up as many oat milk cartons as possible. With a lot of time and a little luck, we barely scraped together enough to finish our batch of cold brew lattes.

As I continue to grow into my new role inventory management and vendor relationships, I realize that what we've done in the past is some version of white-knuckling. We see we're running low on product, factor in all the supply-and-demand variables we can think of, mathematically calculate how much end product we'll need, mathematically calculate how much oat milk that necessitates, place an order, and hope the delivery timing is in our favor. There are about 10 factors that go into these calculations, each allowing for the possibility of error, and many of which are contextual guesses. That doesn't even include the delivery timing implications.

In comes me. I have a different idea. A simpler idea. After all, simpler is better......always! Here's the new math:

1. How many cases of oat milk can we store at any given time? 56 (about 168 gallons worth). This is approximately three days' worth of need for us.

2. How many cases of oat milk do we have left today? At the end of each business day, someone counts how manycases we have remaining and reports it to our inventory management Slack channel. Let's say the answer is 20. We have 20 cases left.

3. How many cases are needed to restock us fully? 56 cases - 20 cases = 36 cases. 36 cases would fully stock us again.

4. By 9PM, we place our order for next-day delivery of 36 cases of oat milk. If we are perfect in our execution and our supplier is also perfect, there's 0% chance we ever run out again. If we forget to order or our supplier has an issue, this process still makes it very likely we never run out. No messy math, no brain damage, no forgotten factors.

Simple always wins! It's funny, as I received some pushback on these types of processes internally. Some say it's too simple, lacking the context of all the craziness happening around us. My response to these types of critiques: "Even more reason to keep it simple! We can't afford to let all the changing variables jeopardize our supply chain!"

This really isn't about oat milk. This is a parable for everything in our lives. Our gut instinct is to always make things more complicated, more complex, and more sophisticated. This is ironic, as simpler almost always beats complex. Simple allows us to keep our heads on straight, removes brain damage from all the mental math, and allows for repetition. It's one thing to get something right once, and an entirely other thing to need to repeat it over and over. Find a way to make your life simpler. Then, after executing, find another! Such a great way to approach this crazy life of ours.

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Define “Actually Enjoy Life”

I received split feedback about the recent post titled A Middle Finger to Our Future Selves. Specifically, it was about the following excerpt:

"...the idea that we don't know whether we'll even be alive when we're older, so we might as well "enjoy life" while we're young. And by "enjoy life," he meant spend, spend, spend. He hated the idea of saving, or heaven forbid, investing. If he had it, he was going to blow it on something fun."

One blog reader replied to this post and said the following: "Your friend is right you know. We should actually enjoy life while we're young and healthy."

I think this comment gets to the heart of a really important decision. How do we define "actually enjoy life"? The friend in my previous post, this blog reader, and countless others tend to define "actually enjoy life" as some combination of spending money on wants and not working. Those seem to be our two cultural measuring sticks of "actually enjoying life."

What if enjoying life is so much more than how much we can spend and how little we can work? I tend to look at life through the lens of meaning. Am I living my most meaningful life? If the answer is yes, then there's a strong probability that I'm "actually enjoying life." If the answer is no, then I may have some issues. But how much money I can spend on wants is not a real driver in that discussion.

This is why contentment is so important. If we define our enjoyment by how much money we can spend on wants, then our ability to enjoy life is essentially capped by our income and resources. If we have many resources, we can be happy. If we don't, we can't. That's a really depressing proposition. Fortunately, it's a lie.

Contentment, on the other hand, disconnects the two altogether. The people I know who are the most content live tremendously enjoyable lives despite having limited resources. They don't allow stuff and leisure to define happiness. This disconnect in definitions is also one of the reasons there are so many people unhappy, fantasizing about retirement, while others are still working in their 70s, happy as a clam. This group of positive and optimistic people aren't defining themselves by how much they can spend or how little they can work. They are merely soaking up every bit of meaning they can find in this life.

Yes, we should "actually enjoy life." Amen to that! However, I don't think it's as simple as deciding to spend as much money on wants as possible. Instead, I believe it comes from pursuing meaning each and every day. Meaning in our home life. Meaning in our work life. Meaning in our generosity. Meaning.....period. The rest will sort itself out.

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It’s Kinda Like a Blog

Over the past few months, Sarah and I have found random pieces of paper and notebooks scattered around the house containing notes from the kids. The notes are generally around 2-3 sentences each, detailing some part of their day. Many of them are dated.

When we asked the boys about them, they answered very matter-of-factly: "Those are our journals. It's kinda like a blog." Hmmm, where would they get the idea of writing blogs?!?! I'd by lying if I said I wasn't completely touched by this little detail. It's fun to know they see what I do, and in some ways, want to emulate it. Moral of the story: kids are always watching.

It gets more interesting. Without divulging full "blog posts," I'll share a few excerpts I've seen:

• "We played football after Dad got home."

• "Dad took us camping."

• "Dad came to our game."

In a journal entry that may only be 2-3 sentences, it's wild that my mere presence in their lives makes the short list of notable events in their day. Again, I was touched, and again, kids are always watching!

I'm on record of saying I don't care what my kids decide to do in life. I will support, celebrate, and encourage any path they feel called to pursue. However, in the meantime, it feels great knowing that they are watching, taking mental notes, and using what they see as launching points to try new things. I'm so proud of them for that, and it makes me even more convinced that setting these positive examples needs to be one of the most important things in my life right now.

Kids are always watching. Words to live by....in so many different ways. If that's true, and the kids are sincerely watching, please go live a life today that you're proud for them to witness. I will endeavor to do the same.

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Remembered For

One of my friends is nearing the end of his life. We've had some interesting conversations recently. As you can imagine, he's been quite introspective lately. He recently asked me a question that I've been thinking about: "What will I be remembered for?"

It's a fascinating question. In many ways, it's the culmination, aggregation, and consolidation of 70+ years of life. What will I be remembered for?

I'm a big believer in reverse engineering. We take the desired outcome and work backward to determine the steps needed today, tomorrow, and the next day to get there. For my friend, much of his cake is baked. The work is done, and now he's trying to discern how the cards are stacked. For many of us (hopefully), there's so much work yet to be done.

What do I want to be remembered for? I'm not going to answer that yet, as I want to give you time to ponder your own answer. But perhaps today is a great day to reflect on the implications of this question.

Here's an alternative way to look at this question. If you were to die today, how would you be remembered? Do you like your answer? If so, you might be on the right track. If not, it might be time for some major soul-searching. Again, I'll save my answer for later.

Here's one thing I know. I DO want to be remembered, and I DO want those memories to be of the positive and impactful variety. Today, I hope my decisions, words, and actions make that more likely, not less. I hope you do the same.

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What Is a Memory Worth?

For the past 25 years, I promised myself that if I ever had a chance to attend a World Cup game, I would. Well, we are nearing the fulfillment of my wish and a referendum on my promise to myself. The World Cup is hitting the U.S. this summer, and one of the host cities is three hours from my house (and 30 minutes from my sister-in-law's). Will I do it? Will I follow through on the dream of younger me? We shall see.

Looking at the calendar, I have the opportunity to watch two teams I have no affinity for or allegiance toward. But it's the freaking World Cup!!!! The get-in price is currently $313 per person. That's the worst seat in the stadium.....for $313.

But what is a memory worth? No matter what happens or how the game goes, going to that game will be a lifelong memory. No question about that. Therefore, if this is something I'll remember for my entire life, is it worth at least $313? I think that's a resounding yes.

Will I actually do it? Only time will tell. Perhaps that's one of the reasons I'm writing this post: So hundreds of people will hold me accountable to my own principles!

I think it's an interesting idea, though. It's so easy to get hung up on prices for things that, on the surface, should cost far less than they do. We look at these prospective transactions and try to view them objectively. We put our logical caps on and attempt to do a little cost-benefit analysis in our heads. Ultimately, though, we sometimes have to throw out the normal playbook and understand we're talking about a lifelong memory. That, in my opinion, can trump the normal decision-making process.

What about you? What's something that might not make much sense on paper, but in the long run, you believe is a steal of a deal, no-brainer?

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Taking It For Granted

A few days ago, I had a question about a project I was working on. It was a question better suited for a conversation than an e-mail or text. As such, I requested a quick meeting. Four hours later, the four of us jumped on a video call to hash through the issue. In 2026, we take for granted just how crazy this is. 25 years ago me would have thought it to be the most insane concept in the world.

One other wrinkle. All four of us were from four different countries in four different time zones. For some of us, it was night, and for others, morning. Again, we live in wild times! With a few clicks on a touch screen, people from all around the world are instantly connected....for free! Again, amazing!!

Yet, we take it for granted. In 2026, this is just called life. Even though I often take it for granted, too, I try to stop and recognize just how special these times are. Sure, modern times present many new, intense, and profound challenges. I never want to gloss over that. At the same time, though, never before have the opportunities been this rich, deep, and wide. We're literally a few clicks from every single person on the planet.

Think about a living person you'd most like to meet one day. Could be a celebrity, or an author, or an entertainer, or a politician, or an entrepreneur. Anyone. Think of that person. Now, think about the reality we're living in, where if you had the courage and gumption, you could essentially reach out to this person today. Send a DM, leave a comment on their post, write them a note, share a story with them, ask for a meeting. Everything is on the table.

I once had a youth group kid who obsessed over a particular music artist. One of the biggest names in the world. His songs were constantly on the radio. Millions of followers. This kid often talked about how he dreamed that one day he could meet this artist. "Why don't you just message him?" I asked. This young man looked at me like I had arms growing out of my ears. That idea was absurd! But I keep pushing him. "Do it!" "Just send the message!" "Quit being scared." "What's the worst that could happen!?!"

Tired of my prodding, he actually did it! About three days later, this massive celebrity responded to him with a thoughtful and contextual message, thanking this young man for listening and reaching out. They've periodically messaged back and forth over the years.

Everything is on the table. Nothing is impossible. That means something different for each of us, but please don't take our opportunities or technologies for granted. Everything is on the table, so we ought to act like it.

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Traditions Compound

It’s the middle of the night. 50 degrees. The sound of silence. I’m in a small tent with two little boys snuggled up to either side of me. I only have my phone to write. The battery is down to 10% and I have somewhere between zero and one bar of cell coverage. Will this post even upload?

I once had a friend give me two pieces of advice:

• Don’t be afraid to start new traditions.

• Let your traditions compound.

Whenever we lean into our traditions, we aren’t adding a new experience. We are multiplying impact. Each rep builds on the last. Something special starts to form.

The boys and I go on the same camping trip every year. We started when they were four; today they are nine. We do similar activities, live a similar schedule, and eat a predictable menu. However, each time is uniquely different. Each time is experienced through the lens of the persons we have grown into, and with the context of the past adventures.

The legend grows. The stories multiply. The reminiscing hits new levels. We all crave this trip, and the anticipation is sometimes as meaningful as the actual experience.

I love finding ways for our traditions to compound, and this trip is a constant reminder of just how real and powerful that concept is. I hope you, too, have some traditions in your life that can compound on you. It makes for a beautiful journey.

Even More Reason

I ran into a buddy at the gym yesterday, and the first thing he said to me was about yesterday's post: "What if you don't have $50,000?" It was a reference to my story about the pile of cash test, where I challenged a client to withdraw $50,000 from the bank and set it on their kitchen table before officially deciding to put $50,000 toward a vehicle.

"What if you don't have $50,000?" It's a logical and realistic question, as $50,000 is a lot of money and many people simply don't possess $50,000. My answer?

"Even more reason not to do it!!!!"

"What, so if you don't have $50,000 in the bank, you shouldn't buy a car?" my friend asked.

"No, if you don't have $50,000 in the bank, you most certainly shouldn't be spending $50,000 on a car," I replied. His eyes got big, and he looked visibly agitated.

This isn't really about cars, though it's framed through the lens of a car purchase. At the heart of the matter is our modern-day assumption that we all deserve to buy whatever we want, regardless of context or reality. And debt allows that to happen.

I reminded my friend that the most money I've ever spent on a vehicle was $20,000. Why? Because that's how much money I had allocated and saved for said purchase. I suppose I could have pulled the trigger on a $50,000, $60,000, or even $80,000 vehicle had I wanted, but sabotaging my family's finances, freedom, and future with large debt payments isn't on my wish list of life. Instead, we buy what we can afford. That applies to cars, sure, but it's also a blanket statement of life. No debt.....period.

I know this is a weird way to approach life, and for many, it might seem limiting. However, there's something beautiful that happens to our psyche when we live in reality. It's powerful to know what's on the table and what's not. I don't think about buying luxury cars because it's simply not in my family's budget. Thus, I don't want. I don't covet. I don't fantasize. Instead, I try to live a meaningful life and embrace whatever beautiful reality we've created for ourselves. I encourage you to do the same.

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The Line

Yesterday's post drew the ire of many. Well, one excerpt, anyway: "I don't care to sell things that can be shared. Several of these possessions have added value to my life, and now they can add value to someone else's. That's how we're created to live, not peddling our used stuff for cents on the dollar."

That one comment fired up the comment train. I partially saw this coming, as the mere idea of not selling our possessions when parting ways with them is a countercultural approach. Several people applauded this mentality, while many others criticized it. One curious reader asked a really thought-provoking question:

"Where's the line? How far do you take this? At what point would you stop giving something away and sell it instead?"

I haven't thought about this question, specifically, but I do have a very clear answer: a house. For Sarah and me, the line is a house. We will sell a house. Everything below that shall be given away. The last two cars we parted ways with were given, not sold. Well, in the case of Sarah's previous vehicle, the recipient insisted on paying us $500, which we honored. No trade-ins. We have something of value, and it served us well for a season of life. Now, we get to share it with someone else; the cycle continues.

When we sold our four-bedroom house and moved into a small two-bedroom townhome, nearly everything was given away. 2/3 of all our furniture. All the lawn equipment. The patio set. My home office. Most of the decor. Each of those interactions with the excited recipients was a gift. I remember the looks on their faces. The relief in their eyes. The gratitude in their voices. That's worlds better than selling something on Facebook Marketplace for pennies on the dollar.

I get it, this is a weird way to live. It's a stretch. It feels like we're leaving money on the table....because, well, we are. However, it's not about money. It's about carrying a posture of possession, not ownership. I possess objects in my life, but I'm not the ultimate owner. He is. That's what it looks like when we actually live in faith. We are called to give from what we have, and uniquely enough, what we have is what we have. Therefore, give it. Give it freely. Give it joyfully. Give it sacrificially.

I dare you to give it a try. Start small. Find something you value, and give it to someone else. It will mess with you in the best of ways. Then, watch how it changes you.

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The Purge

I recently did something I've been dreaming about for quite some time: I hired a company to drop off a dumpster in my driveway for a week. The last few days have been glorious. I methodically worked through my garage, finding anything and everything that needed to go. Then, I searched my house, room by room. A little of this, a lot of that.

I can't even describe how cleansing this process has been. Years of build-up, melting before my eyes. Figuratively, it feels like I've lost 75 pounds. I'm lighter on my toes. My mind is clearer. The stress is declining.

Maybe this is a good idea, but perhaps we should all practice this ritual from time to time. I've dabbled in this subject on the blog, but minimalism intrigues me. I'm certainly not anywhere close to that, yet, but I aspire to move in that direction.

Pax even made a "free" sign, and we placed a bunch of good stuff on the curb. It was fun watching countless people stop to grab things: a grill, old bikes, tables, and various toys. One of my friends called and said he saw my treasure trove of free stuff. "Why don't you sell that? You could make decent money from it."

I don't care to sell things that can be shared. Several of these possessions have added value to my life, and now they can add value to someone else's. That's how we're created to live, not peddling our used stuff for cents on the dollar.

I gotta tell you, it's been such a refreshing experience purging these last few days. I'm not sure this resonates with you, but if so, perhaps it's something worth trying in your life. In the meantime, I'll be working to fill the rest of this dumpster and finding other items for other families to enjoy.

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Breaking Brains

While I'll probably be a lifelong Michael Jordan GOAT advocate, I've always been a fan of LeBron James. His longevity and consistency will surely be studied someday. Not only should he not even be playing at this point in his life, but to see him be the best player on the court game after game is shocking.

As I watched the first quarter of last night's Lakers vs. Rockets playoff game, something dawned on me: None of the five Rockets starters were even alive when LeBron made his NBA debut. Not babies, not toddlers. Unborn! Not in existence.

It breaks my brain. I've watched this guy play since I was a college kid, and it never ceases to amaze me. What I love most about his story is the fact that he actively and continually does things he's not supposed to do. He takes conventional wisdom and turns it on its head. He and his son are teammates, for goodness sake! He's breaking people's brains, day after day. Even the most staunch Michael Jordan GOAT advocates should be amazed by LeBron's continued journey.

Regardless of the area of life, I love when people do things that break people's brains. I love it when people take the path less traveled. I love it when people make decisions that make others uncomfortable. I love it when people turn their backs on conventional wisdom and seek a better way.

From a personal perspective, I savor the moments when people ask me why I do such dumb things. Or when people ask why I wouldn't do xyz instead, as those things would be far more financially lucrative.

My encouragement is for you to find moments in life that might break people's brains. Not for the sake of shock and awe, but because doing things like that is often a sign that you're on the path toward meaning.

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Oops, Wrong Highway

I recently met with a mid-40s couple who live a great life. By all accounts, they appear to have won the lottery of life. The keyword is "appear." Don't get me wrong, they are sincerely doing very well, and by many people's definition of success, they would get an A+ grade.

However, when I asked them what their dreams are in life, they shared goals that are somewhat (or largely) perpendicular to their current actions, decisions, and direction. In other words, they say they want one thing, but they are actually pursuing another. They are driving on the wrong highway!!!

I visually drew this dynamic on a whiteboard, and their jaws dropped. Not because I said something profound, but because it immediately struck them how obvious it was when a light was shone on it. Their immediate reaction was something along the lines of, "Well, we know what changes we need to make!"

I loved that for them. They are so clear about their dreams and callings, and now, for the first time in nearly two decades, they will start making intentional decisions to drive down the right highway (instead of hoping they accidentally get there someday).

This is a topic my wife and I talk about a handful of times per year. Are our choices (work, money, parenting, relationships, etc.) aligning with our vision for what we want in the future? If yes, amazing. If not, we have some difficult choices to make.

I think these are fantastic questions to ask ourselves:

• What do I want my life to look like in 10, 20, or 30 years?

• Are my current decisions and behaviors leading me toward or away from that desired destination?

• What changes do I need to make to reorient myself to my mission and/or accelerate my progress toward it?

Give it a shot! I hope you find it as enlightening (and humbling) as we do.

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