¿Por Qué?

One of our Palmful of Coffee team members is named Alejandra, from Colombia. Early 20s, ministry background, trained and formally educated coffee expert, with a deep passion for all things coffee. She is a true scholar of the art and science of coffee production, from the plant to the cup. Her role in Palmful of Coffee is to create, uphold, and maintain standards for the quality, treatment, and execution of the coffee collection process. In other words, she's the primary driver of operational excellence. She and I have spent a lot of time together over the past few days and engaged in many (interpreter-assisted) conversations. Eventually, I noticed a trend. After I would talk, she would respond, "¿Por qué?"

Translated into English: "Why?" I'd share a few more thoughts. "¿Por qué?" again.

I joked with her that I knew "¿Por qué?" was coming. She apologized. I told her that I absolutely love it. Before I could share my perspective on her curiosity, she said that she has a deep desire to understand what's really going on, where people's hearts truly are, and why things are the way they are. I couldn't have said it better myself!

Her "¿Por qué?" question took us from the truth to the truth behind the truth. The why behind the why. The real truth. The reason behind the reason. That one question takes conversations and understandings from surface-level to something much, much deeper. I'm so glad she asked, as she prompted me to share much deeper meaning behind some of my actions. Without her curiosity, I suspect I would have let it remain at a surface level. I gave her the reason, but she wanted the reason behind the reason.

"¿Por qué?" "Why?" Regardless of the language we're speaking, this simple but powerful question has the power to force us to a deeper level. Obviously, this applies to relationships, but it also applies to ourselves. When was the last time we stopped to ask ourselves "Why?" or "¿Por qué?"

What's the reason behind the reason? Why are we REALLY making this decision? Why do we REALLY care about this? What hidden motivations are REALLY at play? If we can go one or two levels deeper with ourselves, as Alejandra did with me, we'd be so much better off. We would quit playing games with ourselves, telling the person in the mirror one thing while actually being guided by something (or someone) different. We'd stop making decisions based on others' opinions and judgments and start making them based on what's truly best for our own callings and families. The reason behind the reason is always the reason. We need to listen to that.

I wish I had half as much wisdom in my early 20s as Alejandra does. Good thing it's never too late! I need to keep asking "¿Por qué?" more often, and I encourage you to do the same. Have a great day!

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