They Shot the Elephant
When I'm sitting face-to-face with most coaching clients, there's an elephant in the room. This person (or persons) desires to retire one day. They'll tell me, "We want to retire in 15 years." They might be 40 years old, meaning their objective is to prepare themselves to retire by age 55.
This desire has many implications. First, it means this couple needs to invest like crazy. They need to intentionally and repeatedly set aside large chunks of money each month as they race the clock to accumulate enough resources to meet their objective.
When they elect to set aside massive resources for retirement (you know, to win the race), this, too, has implications. It means fewer financial resources available to the family month in and month out. That may mean less fun, fewer vacations, less generosity, and a more frugal lifestyle. It might also mean they linger in higher-paying, lower-meaning jobs. After all, what's the point in pursuing work that matters if we're busy racing toward the finish line and stop working as quickly as possible? There's a conscious trade-off between finding meaning in their life now (which they might not) and hurrying toward the retirement finish line.
The financial and career pressures begin to build, all for the sake of meeting these age-based retirement goals. Some people enjoy this process, but most don't. In fact, it can turn a frustrating endeavor into a pressure cooker of stress, weight, and disappointment.
Then, there are meetings where I sit face-to-face with a different kind of client. This is the type of couple who, like me, have zero desire to retire. Both spouses are pursuing work that matters, enjoying the journey, and living with meaning every step of the way.
In a recent meeting with one of these couples, I was writing a bullet list of possible uses for their taxable investment account. As soon as I wrote the word "pre-60 retirement," they asked me to erase it. "We don't want to retire. We like to actually live our lives and have purpose." I love it!
The implications of this mindset shift run deep. Immediately, we were able to pivot our approach and create a weird and counter-cultural way to approach this topic. Every ounce of pressure and urgency melts away, as there's no defined race to run. Instead, we can plan more intentionally and weave all the pieces together in a way that creates a cohesive lifestyle (not just someday down the road, but today). There is no elephant in the room; they shot the elephant!
Instead of allocating massive sums of resources to retirement, they can take a more measured and flexible approach. They can allocate more money for memories, travel, and giving. Their investments, instead of needing to fund an ever-earlier retirement, can now feed more meaningful endeavors. Their career decisions can be centered around meaning, not paychecks. More than anything, there's no weight. They are going to be great. They don't feel burdened or heavy. It changes everything!
I shot the elephant years ago, and I'm so glad my client did, too! When we can untether ourselves from the race toward retirement, it literally changes every single aspect of our lives. So beautiful! Is it something you'd consider? Please think about it, and we'll talk about it again soon.
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