Some Words Stick

While in Los Angeles earlier this week, I had an unexpected but refreshing interaction. A woman approached me and said, "You're the 12% guy!!!" I had no idea what she was talking about, to be honest. She went on to explain how she saw me speak at an event earlier in the year. It was regarding a story I told about my first meeting with my friend, Gary Hoag. Here was the interaction:

Gary: "Are you generous?"

Me: "Yes I am!"

Gary: "Why do you say that?"

Me: "Because I give 12%, and 12 is more than 10." #facepalm

Gary went on to explain how true generosity isn't a number, but rather the product of giving joyfully and sacrificially.....which contextually looks different for everyone. In my case, 12% wasn't sacrificial at all. I share how Gary's words in this conversation profoundly changed the trajectory of my life.

I often use this story in my talks for a few reasons:

1) To highlight a healthy biblical perspective of giving: joyfully and sacrificially.

2) We need to be genuine and occasionally laugh at ourselves

3) It shows how we all can grow in our generosity.....even naive and selfish people like younger me.

As this woman told me the story, she concluded by expressing how that talk completely changed her perspective on giving. More importantly, she was able to let go of so much guilt and self-talk. Or, as she put it, "For the first time, I was able to give from a place of joy."

Some words stick. Not all of them, and certainly not for all people.....but some do! Words have the power to transform lives. The problem is we never know which will be the right words for the right person. I'm grateful this woman shared her story with me. I often speak or type with the confidence that some of my words might stick, but I rarely know for certain if they do. These little reminders fill me with much joy and encouragement.

Also, notice the multiplication effect of our words. Gary has shared his perspective of generosity with tens of thousands of people. Many have surely disregarded him, but it changed my life forever. Years later, due to his work in my life, I'm sharing similar words with entirely new audiences. Many will disregard me, but it made a difference in this woman's life. That's multiplication!

The same goes for you. Your words are important....oh so important! Many will fall on deaf ears, but some will stick. I pray that somewhere along the journey, you'll get these sweet little reminders from people that your words are, in fact, making a difference. Keep planting seeds. Keep doing the hard work. Keep encouraging. Keep picking others up when they can't pick themselves up. Keep showing up, even when it feels pointless. Keep making a difference, because it matters!

The First Slice is the Best!

On my flight yesterday, I had a front-row seat to a little family struggle. Here's how it played out. Mom, Dad, and 12ish-year-old son sit down right in front of me. They had to hurry from one flight to the next, but they were able to grab some food and bring it onto the plane. After the plane took off, the mother distributed the food. Side note: it looked absolutely delicious. A while later, the son decided he was full after eating about 2/3 of the meal. He looked satisfied and content. The mother, clearly annoyed, chewed him out and said it was wrong for him to waste food. She made him eat the remaining 1/3, after which he seemed stuffed and miserable. 

As I'm writing this, I keep oddly thinking about pumpkin pie. Maybe it's the fact fall is in the air, but I couldn't be more excited to slam some pumpkin pie soon. The correct whip cream-to-pie ratio is 1:1, by the way. Anyway, the holidays are quickly approaching, and soon, that pie will be mine! Eating that first slice of pie is going to be outstanding. That second slice won't be as amazing, but I'll also enjoy the heck out of it. The third slice? That one will start to feel iffy. And the rest of the pie? If I were to put down the rest of it, you'd have to carry me to the hospital.

How can the first slice of pie sound so amazing, but the eighth slice sound absolutely unbearable? It's called the law of diminishing returns. The more we have of something, the less satisfying it becomes. That's where we get the saying, "Too much of a good thing." Whether it's the young guy on the plane or me slamming Thanksgiving pumpkin pie, we're all impacted by this phenomenon. Everyone over the age of 12 intuitively understands this concept, especially when it comes to food. 

However, we have a blind spot. It's called materialism. 

• When we get our first iPhone, it revolutionizes how we engage with people and access information! However, when the newest model comes out next year, and we spend our hard-earned money to upgrade, we're barely getting anything for the money.

• When we take that long-awaited vacation with our family, it's an amazing, creating lifelong memories experience. However, when we take our 6th vacation of the year, it becomes just another trip. 

• When we finally build up an adequate emergency fund to protect our family from a serious life situation, it's a tremendously relieving feeling. However, when we endeavor to double or triple that number, we feel only slightly more secure. 

Without realizing it, we work our way into too much of a good thing. Everywhere we look, the law of diminishing returns is knocking on the door. We can ignore it and keep falling for the trap, or we can open the door, admit we're prone to these psychological influences, and make more intentional choices. 

Now, where's that pumpkin pie?

To Coffee or Not to Coffee

We had a fantastic event last night in Los Angeles. I couldn't have been more grateful to be in that room. One of the points I wanted to drive home was the importance of each person spending their values. Not the values of their neighbors, family, co-workers, or the underlying culture. This seems obvious, but most people subconsciously spend other people's values.

To illustrate this, I used a story I've previously shared on this blog. A young woman comes to me, frustrated with her situation. She's a young adult with a good career, but she’s discontent. Ever since college, her dream was to travel. However, two years into her career, she still hadn't traveled.

She had a fairly expensive car (with hefty payments to go with it), so I asked her about it. She said she didn't really care about the car. Her parents told her she needed something "reliable," which led her down this path. She was also living in a fairly high-end apartment. Again, she said she really didn't care much about it. It's where many of her close friends live, so it seemed the right place for her.

While she believed she was spending her values, I showed her how her two most significant expenses in life directly resulted from her living her parents' and friends' values. Shortly thereafter, she sold the car and moved into a cheaper apartment, opening the door for lots and lots of travel (you know, her values).

When we got to the Q&A portion of the night, I asked the audience what expenses in their budget DON'T add value to their life. There were many good answers, but two women almost simultaneously shouted "coffee." One of the women explained how she often goes to Starbucks, and it's always a ripoff to her. It doesn't add nearly as much value as it costs her.

It reminded me of a post I wrote a few weeks ago about a woman who finds tremendous value in her 7-days-per-week $7 lattes. These women have the complete opposite opinion about the very same purchase. One says it's the biggest waste of money, while the other calls it the biggest bargain and value-add in her life.

This is the beauty of how we're all wired differently. It's also a perfect representation of why it's important to lean into our unique values. If we do, it drives meaning. If we don't, it causes discontentment. It's the same $7 purchase, but one adds and one subtracts.

Here's my question today. What's one thing you spend money on that doesn't add value to your life? For me, it's fast food when I'm scrambling from place to place. I love the occasional fast food meal, but I get absolutely no enjoyment from it when it's done out of stress and hurry. I need to cut those from my spending.

That's my answer. What about you? I hope you have a meaningful day, living in accordance with your values!

Earning the Right: Part 2

In yesterday’s post, I discussed the importance of making enough money to pay the bills. If we earn “enough,” we get the right to do it again next month. For this reason, money isn’t irrelevant in the meaning over money dynamic. Earning enough money affords us the opportunity to continue walking down the path of meaning in our day-to-day lives. My inbox has been flooded with responses. The most prevalent feedback is from people who “feel bad” about charging for their work when they love it so much. They would probably do it for free if they could. But that’s the problem. To continue serving others with their beautiful gifts, they must charge enough to keep the financial train on the tracks. Therefore, charging a reasonable price for their work is a good and noble thing. If we believe this, it changes everything!

Today’s post is a different angle on this “earn the right” concept. It’s one thing to charge people for your work, but another for people to want what you’re selling. Just because you say something is worth $x, it doesn’t mean it is. The tell is whether people want to pay you what you say it’s worth. If they do, it is….if they don’t, it’s not. Again, this is an earned privilege. We must add more value to the customer than what we charge them. If we do that, they will likely be happy. That’s only the first half of the equation, though. Let’s say someone trusted us enough to exchange their hard-earned money for our product/service. The next question is, did we earn the right to serve them again? It’s one thing to try something once, but it’s an entirely different thing to go back again, and again, and again. That requires us to add value, exceed expectations, treat them well, and build trust…..then repeat.

Later today, I’ll be delivering a talk in Los Angeles. It’s a slightly different version of the talk I did in June for the same organization. I’m also scheduled to do it a third time in January. I’m tremendously grateful for the opportunity, and I don’t take it for granted. I know for a fact this wouldn’t have happened had I not earned the right to do it again. If I performed poorly the first time, or was difficult to work with, or simply wasn’t perceived as “worth it,” I wouldn’t be here. They know that and I know that. Every time I step up to the plate, whether it’s a talk, a podcast, a blog post, or a coaching meeting, I’m giving it my best in hopes of earning the right to do it again. If I publish crappy blog posts, you’ll stop reading. If I produce lame podcast episodes, listeners will unsubscribe. If I deliver a bad talk, I won’t get invited again. And if I don’t serve my coaching clients well, they will fire me (and rightfully so!).

Every day, we must earn the right to serve them again.

Earning the Right: Part 1

The idea that "money doesn't matter" is naive at best, and misleading at worst. Even in the world of Meaning Over Money, it doesn't mean meaning=100 and money=0. Here's why. At the end of the day, we need to feed our families. We live in a world that requires us to financially care for ourselves. Failing to do so has some pretty dire consequences.

As such, living a life full of meaning, but failing to provide the basic needs for our family, flat-out doesn't work. It's a recipe for disaster. Yeah, I'm all about the pursuit of meaning. However, if we can't figure out how to pay the bills in the process, we lose the right to pursue this path. Completely disregarding money isn't the answer.

Three factors are at play when building a sustainable, meaningful life. We must combine our skills, with our passions, in a way that's profitable. Skills and passion without profit is a hobby. Passion and profit without skills will lead to failure. Skills and profit without passion will result in a job we merely tolerate (or worse). But if we can combine all three? That's a beautiful situation. When I say "profitble," I'm not suggesting we need to be Jeff Bezos or Elon Musk. Rather, I'm suggesting we make enough.

Enough. What does "enough" even mean? To me, it means earning the right to do it again. When I make enough this month, I earn the right to serve those who I wish to serve again next month. This is so important, and this is why so many entrepreneurs, freelancers, and solopreneurs fail. They don't fail because they are bad at their craft. They fail because they didn't earn the right to keep doing their craft.

The meaning over money angle comes into play in the curation of our lifestyle, which determines what enough is. Suppose we lean too much into the materialistic side of things. More debt, more expenses, more obligations. In that case, we raise the financial bar so high that we don't have a chance to combine skills, passions, and profit in a way that's enough. Therefore, our desire for stuff ultimately overpowers our pursuit of meaning. I see this happen again, and again, and again.

So next time you find yourself struggling to charge what you're worth or creating a revenue from your skills and passions, just remember you're not being selfish or greedy. You’re trying to earn the right to continue doing it. If you don't, you rob yourself and those who you serve. So, you charging what is fair and just is a noble, good thing. It's the prerequisite to the path of meaningful work. Don't be scared of that....embrace it!

Spice-It-Up Challenge

When it comes to financial giving, most people fall into one of two camps:

1. It doesn't really exist

2. It's methodical and/or unemotional

I feel for those who don't have generosity in their lives. They don't know what they are missing! There's sincerely nothing better we can do with money than give it away. There are multiple reasons why people don't have giving in their life:

• It was never modeled for them

• They don't believe it's their responsibility to help others

• They'd rather spend it on themselves

• They are jaded because of a negative past experience

• They think they can't afford it

If you fall into one or more of these categories, I implore you to give generosity a chance. Giving will change our lives more than the recipients'. It will rock your world!

On the flip side, many people give, but do so methodically....and largely unemotional. They may have their giving on auto-pilot, or at least know where, how much, and when their gifts will be made. Giving is a regular (or semi-regular) part of their life, but it's not given deep consideration. Some give out of guilt, others out of a sense of obligation, and some for more noble reasons. Whatever this looks like, however, it doesn't usually play a significant role in their day-to-day lives. 

Givers, I think we need to spice things up a little. Giving should be the most enjoyable part of our financial life. If it's not, we're doing something wrong. I love that you give. Props to you for giving in the first place! But, and it's a big but, you deserve better! You deserve to find meaning, joy, and first-hand impact with your giving. You deserve to feel your giving.

So today, I have a challenge for you. Let's call it the spice-it-up challenge. Whatever day you're reading this, I challenge you to take $10 and find a unique way to give it away. It can be more than $10, but it doesn't need to be. How you use this money is up to you. Maybe it's a stranger you see at the grocery store, or the barista at your favorite coffee shop, or someone at church who's been struggling, or even a friend.

It can't be the same giving you always do. After all, this is the spice-it-up challenge......the name alone requires creativity and spontaneity. There are only a few prerequisites:

• It has to be unique.

• You have to care avou the purpose of the gift.

• You must be able to experience the impact of your gift (which may require anonymity). 

• It has to make you smile.

This is a beautiful act to practice. And just like anything else, we get better with practice. This has been a regular part of my life for about seven years. If I'm having a crappy day, I stop what I'm doing and find an opportunity to creatively give to someone. It never fails; that ALWAYS turns my mood around. 

Ready. Set. Go spice it up!

Letting the Wins Add Up

I recently received a call from a friend. He had a question. “I just got a $110k inheritance that’s sitting in my checking account. I need it in about a year for ______. I feel like I should do something with it between now and then. Do you have any good investing ideas?” It was an interesting question, and I had an immediate idea for him. 

I explained that if he opens a Vanguard taxable brokerage account, and deposits the cash but doesn’t actually invest it, he would receive risk-free monthly interest payments of about $500. I was anticipating an excited, dare I say giddy, response. However, he reacted with complete disinterest. “Nah, doesn’t seem worth the hassle.” Not knowing what his hangup was, I responded that I’d be happy to sit down with him to set it up…..it would only take 15 minutes or so. Again, he declined, stating it wasn’t worth the time and effort for “only five hundred bucks per month.” In a last-ditch attempt to change his mind, I reminded him it’s 100% risk-free, and he could take the money out whenever he wants. No bueno. He ended the conversation by saying he has a buddy with some good stock tips he might look into. Put another way, he just gave up $6,000+ of income that would have taken him a maximum of 15 minutes of his time……ouch!

Sometimes we’re so busy looking for the life-changing opportunity that we miss the little wins available to us along the way. Perhaps $500/month wouldn’t change his life, but what if he made this decision, then the next one, then the next one? Wins add up, big or small. Occasionally, I’ll take an inventory of a client’s wins over 6, 12, or 18 months. I’ll take stock of all the little choices they made and the net result of them. Each win, in and of itself, feels small. However, when viewed through a wider lens of cumulative impact, these small wins account for a significant shift in their finances. 

Mind those little wins. They add up fast!

This man’s story doesn’t directly impact you, but perhaps his non-decision raises your eyebrows. Yes, you can get a risk-free 5.25% by simply depositing money into a Vanguard taxable brokerage account. No strings, no commitments, no risk. Here’s how you do it:

• Go to www.vanguard.com

• Open a taxable brokerage account

• Transfer your money into your new Vanguard account

• DON’T invest it. Just let it sit there. 

• Watch the interest payments land in your account on the last day of each month.

• Transfer money back to your bank account whenever you want.

Or you can just shoot me a message and I’ll help you! It’s quick and easy.

We Don’t (Completely) Live on an Island

It sometimes feels like we're living on an island. Whenever we talk about such crazy ideas as pursuing work that matters, not keeping up with the Joneses, and practicing radical generosity, criticism and hate start rolling in. I feel it daily, but I regularly get stories from you about the harsh words and criticism you receive.

One of you left your job to pursue a career that makes a bigger impact, and a family member called you "irresponsible." Another one of you sold your fancy car and downsized your house, and people started asking if you were broke. Another person stopped hoarding money and started giving significantly more, and their colleague responded with, "Your kids deserve better." I could rattle off another dozen of these stories.

It can feel lonely at times, but community changes everything. Every time I absorb some online hate (which has slowed down in recent months), I immediately get an e-mail from one of you with an incredible story about your own journey. It's easy to dwell on the haters, while simultaneously glossing over the people who are right there alongside you. We're all on this journey together, and I couldn't be more grateful. I was reminded of this fact when a friend texted the name of a song, along with the message, "You write this song?" I had no idea what he was talking about, so off to Google I went. It’s called Bigger Houses by Dan + Shay.

Check out these lyrics:

Used to dream about buying that bigger house

Sitting on top of some hill

Losing sleep about filling my bank account

Wondering if I ever will

But the older I get, I just care less and less

'Bout keeping up with people named Jones

If you don't fill it up with somebody that you love

It ain't ever gonna feel like home

There's always gonna be a higher high

You could chase for the rest of your life

Greener grass in the yard next door

Or a shined up Chevy little newer than yours

You're never gonna fill an empty cup

If what you got's still not enough

The thing about happiness I've found is

It don't live in bigger houses

I can hear the kids making little footsteps

Running down the hallway upstairs

I can see the dogs playing in the back yard

Through the kitchen window right there

Maybe life's kinda more 'bout us swinging on a porch

Holding her while the sun disappears

Why would I wanna be anywhere else in the world

When my whole world is sitting right here?

Wow! It's so fun to know others are spreading the meaning over money message. Here's the fun part. We don't need to be a world-renowned band to have a platform. We all have a platform. We all have people watching us. That's an amazing opportunity.....and a huge responsibility. We can model money, or we can model meaning. If you're one of the hundreds who read this blog literally daily, I suspect you're probably in the meaning camp.

It sometimes feels like we're living on an island. That's probably not entirely true, but if it is, let's invite others to join the party! There's room for everyone on this island!

Get Your At-Bats

I was recently invited to speak to an organization called Ankeny Young Professionals. They are an offshoot of a local chamber of commerce. I’ve been in discussions with their leadership for more than a year, eagerly anticipating an opportunity to speak. Needless to say, I couldn’t be more excited. This is a huge opportunity for me, but not for traditional reasons. It’s not going to be a significantly large audience. The room won’t likely be filled with powerful CEOs. I’m not getting paid a ton of money (unless you consider $0 a lot!). 

Here’s why I’m excited for this one:

• Young professionals are my people! I serve many different groups of people, but for whatever reason, I connect well with them……and vice versa. 

• There will be a lot of familiar faces in the room. Acquaintances, friends, clients, and other people I’ve interacted with at some point. I never take for granted when people in my life take time out of their day to read, listen, watch, or absorb my content. It’s a true pleasure. 

• This opportunity gives me another at-bat. This right here, this is the gold!

It will be the third time formally delivering my new keynote talk. This talk is the culmination of more than 100 non-related talks, thousands of client meetings and conversations, and all my content over the last decade. The first time I delivered this talk, I did it poorly (I know I’m hard on myself). The second time I delivered it, I did it ok. What about this time? There’s only one way to find out!

That’s why at-bats are so important. Each time we step up to the plate, it’s an opportunity to hit a home run, strike out, or something in between. But the only way we can get better is by stepping up to that plate, fear and all. This is the reason I crave opportunities to practice my craft. Will I strike out? Maybe. Will I hit a homerun? It’s possible. But regardless of what happens, I promise I’ll get better.

This is the opportunity we each have today. No matter what you do or what you’re trying to become, nothing can replicate the power of stepping to the plate for another at-bat. Yes, it’s possible you’ll strike out. Yes, you might embarrass yourself. Yes, you might get humbled. Yes, your nightmares might come true. That’s all on the table. But the risk of those things coming true is the entry price to impact. It might be THE thing standing between you and where you want to be.

Are you interested in watching me take my next at-bat? The talk is on October 11th from 12:00-1:00 in Ankeny. If you’re hanging around central Iowa that day, I’d be so grateful and honored if you decide to spend your lunch with us. Tickets are $15 for non-members, which includes the cost of your lunch. So you’re maybe paying $5 to hear me speak…….I’m hoping to add way more value than that!

Cushion is Key

I'm notorious for pitching counter-cultural and seemingly contradictive ideas to my clients. Ideas such as:

• Stopping the use of credit cards makes our finances less risky and more streamlined.

• Creating more savings accounts makes our financial life simpler. 

• Spending more on our wants (with less guilt) creates better control and restraint on our finances. 

Another seemingly contradictive idea came up this week while I was on the phone with a client. We were discussing a separate issue when he said, "Travis, you were right." Whenever someone says, "Travis, you were right," I'm all ears. It always beats "Travis, I told you so."

The idea in question was my insistence that if we do budgeting the right way, we'll never again care what day a paycheck is coming or what day a bill is being paid. For millions of Americans, one of the biggest tension points in their finances is the fear x bill will be paid before y paycheck arrives. Most believe the answer is to make more money. I can testify this is entirely false. It doesn't matter how much money we make if we don't do it well. I've worked with clients making $25,000/month who have this problem, and I've worked with NFL players making 10x this who have this problem. 

If the solution isn't more income, what is? There are two pieces. First, we need a cushion in our checking account. When the month begins, we must have a certain amount in our checking account. Each family is different, but a cushion is key. Some families elect for a $2,000 cushion (where my family traditionally stands), while others aim for $5,000, $8,000, or even $10,000. I've even worked with one client who kept a $250,000 cushion (it's a long story with a fun ending). 

This money isn’t to spend….it’s to hold. This cushion removes most of the fear about the sequence of transactions. If there's an appropriate cushion, it doesn't matter if two large bills come out before that next paycheck. Going from $3,000 to $1,000 is a nothing burger compared to going from $500 to -$1,500. 

However, that's just half of the remedy. Here's the other half. We need to be intentional with our income. For example, if your family has $8,000 of income arriving this month, you need a plan to spend/save/give $8,000. Not more, and not less. Here's how the math works.

Beginning Balance: $3,000

Income: +$8,000

Spend/Save/Give: -$8,000

Ending Balance: $3,000

If done well, you'll end the month with roughly the same amount you started with. Along the way, you'll have funded your needs, wants, giving, saving, and investing with ALL your income. Then, when the next month comes around, you'll get to do it again. If we play this out for 20 years, you'll wake up on the first of the month with the same $3,000 cushion. 

Whoalla! If you follow these two steps, you'll never again think about timing. It's so simple, yet so powerful. Please let me know if you have any questions. I'd love to help!

Don’t Picture Them Naked

My crippling fear of public speaking is well documented. Years ago, I recognized the importance public speaking would have in my career. Speaking in front of clients, colleagues, investment committees, and the like. I didn't want that, but it seemed inevitable. As I started the process of overcoming my fear, I asked people for speaking advice and tips:

• Keep the mic close to my face.

• Don't pace back and forth.

• Don't talk for too long.

• Don't vomit within eyeshot of the crowd.

• Know your audience.

• Make eye contact.

• Picture them naked.

All of that was great advice…..until the whole naked part. Have you ever tried imagining the person you were talking to was naked? Never mind, don't answer that. So many people gave me that advice. Sure, sure, I'll just picture hundreds of people sitting shoulder-to-shoulder, naked, attentively watching me speak. Nothing weird about that. Yeah, that sounds like a perfectly normal and rational scenario. 

It's safe to say I didn't utilize this piece of advice. However, a slightly different version of this advice significantly altered my perspective while on stage. It has nothing to do with the garments the crowd is or isn't wearing. Rather, it's about why they are there and what they are thinking. 

Here's what someone once told me. The audience WANTS the speaker to succeed. The audience is cheering for them. Why? Nobody wants to be part of a train wreck. Nobody wants to personally endure the unwinding of someone's reputation and dignity. Further, the audience WANTS to experience something powerful and impactful. Otherwise, they are just wasting their time. In other words, most people in those seats are our advocates. It's simply our job to deliver well and affirm what they are already hoping for.

When I learned this, and actually believed it, it changed everything! In the years since hearing this perspective, I started adopting it in other areas of my life. Sure, there will absolutely be people in our life who get jealous. There's no way around that. However, I've found most people in my life want me to succeed. They want to cheer me on. They want to be part of something cool, not a dumpster fire. On the flip side, I feel the same way about people in my life. I get even more satisfaction and joy out of watching my people thrive. I'm one of their biggest fans, and I want them to know it. 

Knowing people are on our side can change everything. First, know you aren't alone. People are rooting for you. Let them rally around you and hold you up when you can't hold yourself up. Second, be sure to let people in your life know that you have their back, believe in them, and are their biggest cheerleader. It makes a world of difference!

You Have Two Choices Today

It's scientifically proven that 4PM on Sunday afternoon is the most depressing hour of the week. We've had a fun weekend, had lots of good food, spent time with people we care about, and haven't thought too much about work. But the weekend is winding down, and we realize tomorrow is quickly approaching. Considering 70% of Americans dislike or hate their jobs, the reminder of tomorrow is a sobering moment! Thus, 4PM is the most depressing hour of the week.

As you begin your Monday, you have two choices. First, you can choose misery. I get it. You don't like your job, you don't feel adequately paid, your boss is a jerk, you don't feel like you're making a difference, and/or it bores you to death. Most people can relate to some combination of those feelings. Your mere presence at work feels depressing. You'd rather be anywhere but there. You count down the time, find ways to distract yourself, and do whatever it takes to numb the feelings until it's time to go home. That's option 1.

Here's the second option. You can choose to be grateful for your work. Whatever you're getting paid, you can be grateful for the opportunity to make a living today. Instead of dwelling on how much the job sucks, you can consider the value you add to other people's lives. Your customers, your co-workers, and your bosses. You can think about the broader mission you're helping to accomplish, and the lives being impacted.

It's about whether the glass is half full or half empty. Our perspective of the glass can be a massive driver of how we feel about our jobs. If we believe our work is good, even if the job kinda sucks, it will provide some level of fulfillment. A slight shift in perspective can change everything. Alternatively, we can dwell on the negative and spin ourselves into a hole of pity and misery. This is where many live.....and I've been there! These are the choices you have today. Two choices with two vastly different outcomes.

Taking a step back, you have bigger choices to make. Do you really want to wake up in that same job tomorrow? If not, you have a different sort of choice to make. Remember, not making a choice is still a choice. If you really hate your work, today is a great day to start finding something different. Put yourself out there. Risk getting ignored. Risk having a bad interview. Risk getting turned down. Risk starting a new job that also sucks. Risk it, because the risk is worth it.

But today? Today, you have two choices. You can approach your day with a positive attitude, and possibly have a good, fulfilling, productive day. Or you can approach your day with misery, all but guaranteeing a terrible, empty, and exhausting day.

I encourage you to choose optimism.....then get about the business of finding something that better suits you. You deserve it!

The Years Are Indeed Too Short

"The days are long, and the years are short."

This phrase was said to me multiple times when my kids were infants. I definitely understood the "days are long" part. With newborn twins, just the 16 bottles per day part felt long. On the other hand, I didn't fully understand the "years are short" part. Everything just felt long....and exhausting.

The boys turned seven yesterday, and we had a great day celebrating. Soccer game, roller skating, ice cream cake....lots of fun stuff. Wow, the years are indeed short. The twos and threes stage felt brutally slow, but they went from four to seven in what seemed like a month. I once read that 75% of all the time we spend with our kids will happen by the time they turn 12. Yikes! That's a staggering statistic. And a depressing one, at that.

Money can buy a lot of things, but it can't buy back lost time. It can buy houses, cars, and technology, but it can't give us back the time, memories, and moments we lost. Over the last few years, as I began to realize the years go by far too fast, I thought I had a solution. I thought if I just tried really hard to live in the moment, it would make time slow down. Turns out it doesn't work like that. Therefore, I eventually conceded that time will fly by no matter what we do, so we might as well embrace it for its rapidly moving beauty.

Happy birthday to Finn and Pax, and I'm excited to experience whatever time I'm blessed to have left with them. It's days like yesterday when meaning over money becomes even more glaring and obvious. Leaving my prior career and starting over 4.5 years ago was one of the scariest decisions of my life. I felt reasonably confident in my decision when I first made it, but that decision has been affirmed over, and over, and over again through the years. Not because it's been easy (it's actually the hardest thing I've ever done), but rather because it matters.

If you're ever teetering on the fence of meaning vs. money, look your children in the eyes. It only takes about 0.2 seconds to realize which side of the fence we should land. Meaning. Always meaning.

Have Your Cake and Eat It, Too

Meaning doesn't pay the bills, or so I'm told. When I advocate for pursuing meaning over money, I typically receive criticism. I get called privileged, naive, short-sighted, and sometimes stupid.

However, I think there's a misunderstanding about this entire meaning vs. money conversation. We don't have to choose between meaning and money. I'm just asking people to choose meaning. If we choose money, there's a chance we find it. If we choose meaning, we will absolutely find it.....and we may even find some money along the way. Here's why. When we pursue meaning, we're likely pouring our blood, sweat, tears, gifts, passions, and energy toward something we believe in. If that's true, we can't help but have some level of success.

This is a significantly better outcome than waking up each day to tolerate or despise what we're about to do. In other words, most people who pursue meaning will ultimately make more money (in the long run) than those who simply chase the money. It's one of the greatest ironies of work and money. Choosing meaning does NOT condemn us to a life of poverty. Choosing meaning does NOT mean we're neglecting our family. Choosing meaning does NOT mean we're going to live a difficult life. I'd argue the opposite, actually.

There's a reason I brought this topic up today. Just this week, two of my clients experienced major job shifts. In an effort to pursue meaning, both accepted jobs that better align with their values and definitions of meaning. Oh yeah, they both received $20,000+ annual increases from what they previously made. So they both have more meaningful work AND make more money doing it.

Fear. Fear is typically the biggest obstacle in pursuing meaning. Change is hard. A known terrible is still better than a likely (but uncertain) good. It's like drinking semi-rotten milk. It tastes awful, and the alternative is probably much better, but there's also a chance it could be completely rotten. People would rather sip on their tolerable semi-rotten milk, and know what they're getting, than take a small risk that it could be worse. That's the funny thing about us humans. We fear a negative outcome far more than we get excitable for a positive outcome. The fear of the unknown is always worse than the reality of the known.....even when the known absolutely sucks.

I'm thrilled my clients were willing to take that chance. They had the courage and the conviction to make a drastic change, and they are mightily blessed because of it. They wake up each day excited for what they're about to do AND make more money for their families. It's a beautiful outcome to a very intentional decision. The decision to simply choose meaning. I couldn't love it more!

How To Get Rich

One of my former youth group kids had a question for me. It was a very clear, direct, and commonly asked question. "What's the best way to build wealth?" I get this question all the time, so I gave him my absolute best answer. Two answers, actually:

1. Pursue meaningful work

2. Always be generous

Confused, he asked a follow-up question. "How will those things help me build wealth?"

"They won't, but they will give you a rich life. That's what you're looking for, right?"

This was the beginning of a wonderful conversation. Without rehashing the entire thing, it led us down a fun road about the purpose of money. He, like so many, equate more money with a better life. In other words, if he can create wealth for himself, he'll have a great life. If he doesn't, he might not.

What I wanted him to take away was this. Wealth is just that, wealth. In and of itself, it provides nothing. I know many wealthy people who live poor lives. On the flip side, a rich life is a rich life. Living a rich life doesn't necessarily require lots of money. A rich life is accessible to all, regardless of education, income, age, or status. Even better, the prerequisites to living a rich life are simple: pursue meaningful work and always be generous. There are obviously more components to a rich life, but if we practice just those two things, there's a high likelihood we'll lead a rich, fulfilling, meaningful life.

Before I close the book on this post, please hear me out. I'm NOT advocating for us living a life of poverty. We must find a way to provide for our family and pay for basic needs. Without that, it will most certainly be a challenging and laborious road. What I'm speaking about here is the choice between having enough and having more than enough. Having enough unlocks the possibility of a rich life. The pursuit of more than enough will often sabotage our ability to live the rich life we are seeking. 

Hope this gives you something to think about today. Have an awesome day!

I Don’t Deserve Anything

I have a confession to make. Something recently triggered me. In my line of work, I bring empathy to the table. I have a ton of grace for people and endeavor to walk alongside them, no matter what they are going through. I've worked with couples teetering on homelessness, and couples with tens of millions of dollars. No matter where someone is in their journey, my mission is to serve them well, with compassion. For this reason, it's rare for me to get worked up. But it recently happened with a close friend. I regret getting triggered, so I thought the best way to process it is in front of thousands of people on a blog. So here we go!

It was a discussion about whether or not this Christian man (and his family) should sell their house and buy something better. By better, I mean 5,000+ square feet, indoor basketball court, amazing pool, private movie theater, and a myriad of other bells and whistles. Here's the part that triggered me: "She deserves it." By "she," he was referring to his wife, and by "it," he was referring to one of the nicest houses you'll ever see. 

"She deserves it." Does she? Really?!?! Does he? They can absolutely buy this house if they want to. There's nothing inherently evil about doing so. But where does deservedness come into play? 

When I think about my life, my family, and my journey, I don't think I deserve anything. I'm grateful for everything we have, but never in a million years would I take the posture that I deserve any of it. Yes, we work hard....but that doesn't mean I deserve it. Yes, we've made wise choices.....but that doesn't mean I deserve it. Yes, I can afford some things.....but that doesn't mean I deserve it. 

This isn't even my money to begin with. As a Christian, I believe everything I have is His. It's my job to manage it on His behalf. It's a responsibility and opportunity I don't take lightly. While I'm here, it will be managed well. When I'm gone, it will be given away for a greater purpose. 

But to deserve a massive house nicer than 99% of people in this country (or 99.99% of people worldwide)? That one triggered me. While we're on the topic of deservedness, I have a few alternative ideas. Here's a short list of people who deserve something:

• People all around the world who barely get enough food to survive. 

• Single moms fighting to make ends meet, barely hanging on. 

• Abused, neglected, and abandoned children who don't have guardians who love them.

• Traffic victims who are ripped away from their lives and forced into a sick and twisted reality.

• _______________ (your example here).

We have options. Sure, we can buy that huge house we want but absolutely don't deserve. That's on the table. Or we can use the resources we're blessed with to serve others. It's a weighty decision we each must make.

Puzzle Pieces

This is a puzzle piece from one of Finn's puzzles. What do you see? 

Here's what the full puzzle looks like:

Did you get it right? Were you even close? That's the fun part about puzzles. Each piece, on its own, means something different (or perhaps nothing at all). But when all the pieces are arranged together, it creates something beautiful. 

Yesterday, I posted about a woman I know who buys a $7 latte each morning. I explained why she does it and how it's about something bigger than a cup of coffee to her. I can usually tell when my posts will be controversial and/or cause pushback. I didn't smell this one coming. When I finished a string of meetings, I was met with an inbox full of responses (I always love your feedback, by the way!). The replies were entirely one-sided.....veering hard negative. Sentiments such as how wasteful she is, how selfish she appears, how materialistic she's behaving, and how bad of a steward she is with her money. 

What I gave you was a single puzzle piece. Many looked at that single puzzle piece and drew their own conclusion about what the entire puzzle looked like. Just like my example above, it's difficult to ascertain the beauty of this puzzle from just one piece. Here's what I'd like to do. I'm going to let you see a few more pieces of this puzzle, then give you a second chance to guess what the full puzzle looks like:

• This woman works in full-time ministry, serving single mothers and their children.

• This woman and her husband have been fostering kids for over a decade.

• This woman is actively engaged in her local church, serving in various areas.

• This woman and her husband drive older cars and live in a very average house. 

• Based on my limited knowledge, I suspect this family gives at least 15-20% of their annual income. 

• This woman is adored by many, which likely stems from how much love and encouragement she constantly pours out to others. 

• Oh yeah, and she buys a $7 latte each morning. 

We're quick to judge others through the lens of our values, our interests, and our limited visibility of their life. But that's the problem. We're looking at it through our lens, not theirs....and we only get to see a few pieces of their puzzle. This woman lives quite conservatively, yet buys a nice coffee each morning. That doesn't make her evil. That makes her unique. This is what makes meaning over money so special. It looks different in every person's life. 

I think the message today is two-fold. First, we should resist the urge to judge people (or their decisions) when we can only see a few pieces of their puzzle. Without proper context, we have no idea what's truly going on. Second, it's ok if your puzzle pieces don't all look alike. It's not until they get fully assembled that they create something beautiful. 

The World’s Greatest Bargain

One of my friends buys a $7 latte every day. When I say every day, I mean every day. During the week, it's usually in the morning. On the weekends, it's either late morning or early afternoon. When she talks about her $7 lattes, her face lights up. She can go on and on and on about her lattes and how much value they add to her life.

Sounds pretty odd, eh? Yeah, I'd have to agree with you. Super weird. Except she's not actually talking about lattes. Sure, she does get a $7 latte every day, but it's not really about the latte. For her, it's about far more than a shot of espresso, milk, and syrup. To her, it's a ritual that signifies the blessing of another day to live. It's the relationships she's built with the staff and other customers. It's spending time in an environment that's uplifting and life-giving. It's finding the little joys in life, and then leaning hard into them. It's spending time with people she cares about and sharing her journey with them. It's meeting strangers and making new friends. It's showing generosity to others through simple acts of kindness.

Money is never about money…..it’s always about something bigger. To this woman, she's not buying a coffee. She's investing in something deeper. Yeah, it adds up to a relatively large expense each month. But if you were to ask her (which I have), she'd tell you her coffee ritual is the world's greatest bargain.

This isn't me advocating for everyone to go buy $7 lattes every day. Far from it. Rather, I'm advocating that we find the little joys in life and lean as hard into them as my friend leans into hers. I'm advocating that we look past the surface level of simply exchanging money for a product. I'm advocating that we focus on the meaning, not the money.

My friend is joyfully and confidently living out an important principle when it comes to life and money. She understands it at a deep level. The irony is that most people look at her and silently judge her as being irresponsible, superficial, and short-sighted. I don't think she cares, though. She's just living her best and most meaningful life.

Jumping Off the Treadmill

I experienced a very profound moment in my life around 2015. It was a few years after paying off our $236,000 of debt. Sarah and I were still in the midst of our fertility battle, but optimistic about possibly adopting a child soon. My career was thriving. And I was making many multiples of income from what I previously made. Reflecting on how blessed my life was, I couldn't help but feel it wasn't enough. It was all just, well, normal. 

This is the season of life where I started pondering what would eventually become Meaning Over Money and my new career. It's also when I started digging deep into the behavioral science of money, work, and happiness. 

The Hedonic Treadmill. I talk about this concept in my keynote, but it also leaks out in many other areas of my work. You may have heard it on the podcast, read it here, or caught it during an interview I gave. The topic comes up often, as it plays a critical role in our lives. In short, the Hedonic Treadmill is a phenomenon by which anything that happens to us, good or bad, becomes normal. We experience up-front pain or euphoria, but in a matter of weeks, we're back to being normal (albeit a new version of normal).

I've experienced the Hedonic Treadmill many times in life. Also, I watch many clients work through it in their own lives. What's interesting is how people interact with it differently IF they recognize it's happening. 

This leads me to a few recent observations:

• I was meeting with a young couple who make around $75,000 combined. Through the course of the conversation, they reveal their desire to get that number to $100,000. Why? Because that's the number that will allow them to feel confident financially.

• I was having a drink with a friend. He mentioned he makes around $120,000 per year, but it feels tight. In his opinion, if he could get it closer to $150,000, they would be set. 

• I spent some time with another couple who frustratingly vented that their $200,000 income wasn't enough anymore. They didn't know the appropriate number, but it's definitely more than $200,000.

• One of my friends proclaimed a family can't survive in this town with an income of only $335,000. 

Several studies have been done over the years around the question of "What is enough?" Well, what is enough? In the overwhelming majority of cases, it's more than whatever their current situation looks like. It's the Hedonic Treadmill in action! 

Back to that profound moment I experienced in 2015. One of the revelations I had during that season was this. Despite making many multiples of my younger self's income, I didn't feel any happier. My younger self wouldn't have believed what older Travis was making, yet it was just "normal" for me as I was living it. The Hedonic Treadmill was kicking my butt.

I had to jump off the treadmill. Do you, too?

___ Months For the Rest of Your Life

Though I share a lot of stories on this blog and on the podcast, not all stories are created equal. Some stick with me, or dare I say, haunt me. One such story involves a couple I met with nearly a decade ago. This couple had been struggling with debt for the entirety of their marriage. You could cut the tension with a knife. The financial stress of the debt altered their life decisions and impaired their marriage. In short, they were miserable.

By the end of the meeting, I had created a clear, simple, and achievable plan to get them debt-free in about 18 months. It wouldn't be easy, but I knew they could do it. I assumed they would be excited about the prospect of freeing themselves from these financial handcuffs, but there was a silence in the room. After a few moments, the wife chimes in, "I'm not giving up 18 months of my life." "It's 18 months for the rest of your life! You'll have more than 50 years on the other side of the debt," I replied. She simply wasn't having it. They weren't going to cut back on their lifestyle.....period. They eventually walked out of the room, discouraged and defeated.

Five or six years later, I ran into them in public. It was the first time we had a real conversation since they left that meeting. When I asked them how things were going, they opened up about how things had only worsened. Not only had they not freed themselves from the debt, but they were in deeper and even more miserable. They both hated their jobs and felt stuck in many areas of life. They didn't want to "give up" 18 months of their life, but what they were subjecting themselves to was a far worse sentence than a little sacrifice and discipline for 1.5 years. I think about them a lot.

I was reminded of them a few nights ago when meeting an awesome young couple. This couple also has a bunch of debt. It feels intense, overwhelming, and life-altering. However, there's a different kind of energy about them. They are approaching it with determined excitement. When I said, "It's ____ months for the rest of your life," they responded with genuine excitement. What they are about to do will be so simple, yet so hard. But they are up for the challenge. Please pray for this young couple and their journey. I have a feeling they are about to write an amazing story. It will be a grind for this season of life, but that good work will unlock the next 60+ years in a way they can't yet understand. I'm grateful to play a small role in their journey.

Encourage the young people in your life. They need it, and they deserve it. They aren't victims of circumstance. They aren't condemned to a less-than-life. They aren't slated for failure. They just need to know it's possible.